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Ayeshah Nov 2019
He promised*  to take me away to a place - where he could  *love me.

*Each time he touched me I believed in his words; in his world I felt safe


I was held in place with a promise ; with his touch.

His eyes witnessed the most vulnerable parts of me;
the me I hide from the world
.

Why?

Why didn't he stop himself; why did he say the most ****** up **** to make me weak;

what's wrong with all this
;  what's
wrong with me???

He doesn't forsake me.

Least not  in the middle of the night in those sweet moments.
He's stolen my mind;

it's filled with thoughts of him & images of us; us in the chair; us on the counter;

us up against the wall;

I'm delirious, my minds failing me just as my body betrayed me.

*
With images of him - lifting me up; all the way up, my ; legs wrapped around his neck
;

he stand there holding me as if I weight nothing - as he drinks his fill of my essence.

I moaned ;  he whisperers he loves me ,  he loves my body;  he tells me I'm  beautiful.

Why?

Why did he make this ugly...

His laugh resonates in my heart ; I hear it all the time ; he's not here though.

I don't know what to tell myself
and I know

now
*He was never here
.

It's all just an illusion.

Because;

He promised*  
to take me away to a place- where he could
  love me.
( But I'm still here & he's not)
© 2015-2077 by Ayeshah K.C.L.N.
All rights reserved.®
No part of this may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means,without prior written permission of Ayeshah K.C.L.N
Clay Face Oct 2019
Halted and tainted.

Discoloration,

Derived from isolation.

Shameful resent, and painful lament, birth exploration of the intimate.


So...

Desperate to drown out the desolate.

Ethereal vitality, lonely and vestal.

Accept all without stall.


Vulnerable and platonic.

In need of deep loving clasp.

An invite to settle my weariness upon thy shoulder.

Someone to open my neck toward without smolder.


The moon reflects upon me.

Truth is intimacy.

If overpassed, you’re in infancy.

Simple and faded, adorable, but deplorable.

Let’s inundate our emptiness together.
Taciturn Oct 2019
I love when you ignore what I say
When you twist my words
till they are beyond recognition.
When you hug me,
even if I say no.

But what does no mean
coming from my mouth?

As I have no worth;
As my words
do not hold any weight.

At least not to you,
who has charmed everyone
with his arrogance
and ignorance.

Who's words are so dear
and sweet
and full of hope.

But I taste only bitterness
as I breath in your religion;
Your morals.

When you tell me
I am like you
My stomach turns.

It's as though
you are calling me
a snake,
just because we share blood.

But I have been taught better.
As the blood in my veins
turned cold;
As it spilled on the tiled floor;

I learned
that blood has no meaning.
Not to me.

Like my words
have no meaning,
to you.
I am really tired and very restless. Still.. the comments in my last post were surprisingly encouraging.
Tori Danielik Oct 2019
The words I say might trigger
Heavy, lead-coated feelings
Taste of bitter copper
Straining of the soul

Nothing will be good
When I utter honesty
And dust is swept off of skeletons
Hidden by- guess who?

Quiet could blanket
But what’s the fun in leaving things be?
What’s the point without my finger
Extended in your direction

Be careful with your next choices
In my mind circles the knowledge
Of your ***** little secrets
Wrapped up in craft-grade twine
blackbiird Oct 2019
Love’s dead.
Love’s dead.
I’ll say it again.
I’ll sing it from the rooftop
'Till these old bones stop breathing.

I’ll take a knife to
My pulmonary arteries and watch
My undeserving heart lose its ruby-colored dressings.
Before I let love
Fool me again
With its deceptive tactics.  

Am I a product of my environment?
Or do I just
Lack the basic capacity
To understand love’s cruel semantics?

Only time will tell what becomes
Of this defective love
That plagues my soul.
ja Oct 2019
My mind gets nowhere
Whenever I talk, deal, and work
The trauma - being so jumpy
Feeling down in the mouth

Why people are so rude
They got me thinking that I’m fake
It’s crazy, can’t change it
It stresses me out

Love expects you to change
I’m tired of myself
Girl it’s true, I want to fast forward
As I can’t sleep tonight
Brie Pizzi Oct 2019
Life has made me bitter

Every proposal
Every instagram post
Every brag by a friend

I ignore the bitter taste in my mouth
swallow it instead
jealousy hides in my stomach
it tries to escape but I somehow force a smile

from the outside I look happy, hopeful
but my smile is masked by gritting teeth
my eyes start to glaze over
I pray no one notices that I'm no longer present in the conversation
because as they speak my jealousy begins to build
it builds so high I have two choices
change the subject or walk away
anything can be better than someone else's perfect relationship
especially when you're convinced you'll never find yours

life has made me bitter
it's my least favorite attribute
memoona kazmi Oct 2019
Let's leave the world behind.,
And meet in silence,
Where the words are no longer required,
To express what we feel...
kain Oct 2019
Like coffee
You taste bitter on my tongue
Slightly sweetened
By the glaze of your eyes
When you wet your lips
And press them to mine
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