Take me back to the South?
I rubbed a puppy but you made it live,
I held your hand and ego as a ghost rode *****,
I tasted your mouth
Your deep addictive kisses were salty ripe with hidden tears, expectations and confessions of fears,
You pressed me for affirmation with one foot out the door,
My supposition acquiesced to passion
Then, you disappeared

Now you’re here
Pressing me,
Asking me what do I want?
I need consistency, presence, commitment, and time.

What do I feel?
What I feel is
Soul mate attraction,
Unconfined by silence,
Driven, diving, biding
Ineffable, inexplicable, unconstrainable
Uncontainable love and lust
Intertwined and unbound
How do you feel?

Do you have clarity?
For me, it’s taking its sweet time
Dragging and compartmentalizing
The inner unraveling of the unforgiven knot of the unacknowledged
The unpolished
And unabolished.

What do I want?
Excuse me as I try to unpack the dusty boxes,
On my neglected shelves.
I’m not a stranger to love or lust,
But, I’m not a friend either.
I’m not an enchantress,
No siren here my friend.
Nor, am I an open book,
My closest companions are the choir of thoughts,
Who sing songs of loyalty, doubts and declarations,
I’ve wandered but
I want a true partner to walk hand in hand the path of a life mundane,
Stealing moments of hungry happiness, exquisite.

You break down my defenses
Despite all logic and suppression,
Fingers press into mind’s flesh,
Nails rake down your neck.
My heart pounds and my mouth rounds,
Warm wet worship,
Down the base of your inspiring ****.
Your groaning and growing elicit my complete attention,
And, focus my irreverent intentions
To unraveling the bead formed on the cusp of your tip,
Your palms trace the strands of my hair,
Your pleasure drives sated completion
Is it plans or preoccupations of hands?
Are you practicing yet?

For now, as you lament love lost
I’ll sit quasi patient,
Outwardly immobile and facetiously engaged
Damp wanting but waiting,
Quietly watching the two flames in my candle
As they melt and burn the wax around its’ wicks,
Hot but constrained
Destructive but contained.

I’ll be externally reverent for the life carefully molded,
Grateful for familial serenity
But, ever mindful of the calling,
Forged by sound, touch and taste
To an internal dereliction sung by our blue flame.

In the beginning, the universe was simple
hydrogen adrift, uniform, featureless.
No spark. No shape. No meaning.

Then came gravity. the invisible hand that pulled atoms toward each other.
Not out of need, but out of attraction.
It didn’t shout. It didn’t rush.
It simply drew things closer.

And in that closeness? Friction. Heat. Fire.
Stars were born.
Inside those stars: gold, carbon, diamond, uranium, the rare, the radiant, the necessary.
Then came life. Then came us.

Without gravity, the universe would have remained cold. Silent. Pointless.
With it, it sang.

So too with love.

We, too, begin as scattered selves.
Drifting. Guarded. Independent.
Then someone enters our orbit
not violently, but undeniably…
and we feel pulled.

And when love is real - not forceful, but fundamental - it becomes gravity.

It creates heat where there was indifference.
It forges meaning where there was monotony.
It makes the rarest things - trust, sacrifice, ecstasy, forgiveness… possible.

Without love, we remain inert.
With it, we combust into something bigger than ourselves.

Not every force is loud.
Some reshape the cosmos… quietly, persistently - one touch at a time.

When everything in sight bursts with colors bright
You anticipate sensations that excite
How you shake my body like ripples through the ground
How you make my head spin as if on a merry-go-round
Shots of whiskey soaking through my skin
Was it a glimpse of heaven or one step away from sin?
You said I am worthy of celebrating what's underneath my clothes
Fantasy manifested
Hair down to my toes
Does ever it captivate your mind with memories?
How it mattered to trace my curves with ease?
It is not intoxication causing my cheeks to flush
Hard finding words to correctly describe this rush
And never got another chance to repeat our brief interaction
Well I hope I was able to reciprocate the same level of satisfaction
I did my best being a version of myself I believed you'd desire
Amidst laughter realized sparks in my center had grown into fire
And I will cherish warmth even if I never see your face again
In veins your name flowed as effortlessly as ink from my pen
Unlike you and simplicity and perfection
Scars are too deep
Too afraid of rejection
And you pointing out reasons I had to love myself
For the first time in a long while seemed to truly help
I wish you could have cradled me in that tent forever
Of course every tie must eventually sever
In your presence I no longer was haunted by ghosts from my past
Potential palpable
Hours ended too fast
When our lips met pretended it would never stop
Unable to control way my stomach flip-flopped
You had this personality that made me feel good
I showed you my favorite spots around my neighborhood
It was obvious you were handsome
To have your interior match?
Already knew better than to get too attached
That night I was happier than I'd been in quite awhile
Surprised how easily you coaxed out my smile
I loved your tattoos and intelligent brain
Plus the method you used your hands made me go insane
We took dab hits staying up most of the night
Until we fell asleep conversing still holding each other tight
For two friends who had so recently met
Admit I sure felt close
*** was like a drug and I couldn't help but crave another dose
I yearned to be better
For you tried to be enough
With so much distance between us
Quitting too tough
So continued living
Stumbling the dark
The hunger shifted to somewhere in the back of my heart
I should have realized from the beginning you were too good for me
Did
Couldn't help but long for what couldn't be
These emotions will stick with me wherever I may go
When I seem sad I look back and recall the gentle glow
I felt when you hugged me
Oh I miss your embrace
In return I hope you sometimes also miss my face

the phosphorus beat of hearth and lap and love
of ambrosia made mother sung
the phosphorus beat of snug lure
and depth inviting

Night,
cold, dark,
in Copenhagen.

Beer,
a friend,
a bar.

We talked about life,
broken loves,
and new seductions.

There were many **** women
in that place,
but none like her.

It wasn’t her body,
it wasn’t what she didn’t say,
she hadn’t even spoken to us.

It was what she radiated,
her gestures,
her gaze,
her harmony.

All the others, full of signals,
red lips,
high heels,
but you, just the simple waitress.

We didn’t know what was happening,
it was magnetism,
a universal energy,
something spiritual.

Maybe it was your presence,
sweet goddess,
disguised as a servant.

A goddess,
one we longed to worship.

You walked up to us,
"Another drink?" you asked.
That sweetness
was a dose of a drug
we craved more of.

He was charged with ecstasy,
an energy,
inviting you to talk,
but saying, I don’t need you.

An energy,
of here I am,
and this is who I am.

That passion,
of being herself,
of acceptance.

That night, I went home
without knowing what happened,
without knowing what had struck me.

What could have been,
was strange,
was magnetism.

What was it?

He admires my shoes,

unaware of the beauty --


of my tempting toes.