Cherry on top
Cherry on bottom
My heart is sinking
Straight to the bottom
The crickets say
They are ashamed of me
And the mosquitos take their aim at me
Cherries are crushed
No longer sweet
Rotten and bitter
False retreat
Writing at night
Gives me strange thoughts
Cherry on bottom
Cherry on top
Outside
At night
Is messing
With my mind

When I seek to be normal
I feel ashamed
of what I am actually being;
But when I seek my joy and happiness
and allow myself to be my unique authentic self
I feel joyful and happy
just being me
even if I am different than the norm.

I didn’t hide it this time
I didn’t bundle up my mess
I didn’t  disguise it in cloth
I did leave it there
Open in the trash for people to see
Knowing the twisted necks and judging faces that will follow  
I did acknowledge how women it is to be ashamed
But I remind myself
not all blood comes from wounds

If I’m always ashamed of the things I’ve done
Should I always be ashamed of the things I do?

in a crowded room,
why won’t you say you love me?
are you too ashamed?

They hide you because they love you!
They hate you because they harm you!
Oh, Little boy!
Everyone feels ashamed of you!

In a drunken stupor
The glass wracks with guilt
Under pressure of a gaze
Willing for them to shatter

--People below carry on
The graying sky a signal  
To the viewer's thoughts,
thoughts about a perished soul

Room full of old confessions
Dreary with a taste of venom
Held in the palm of a sinner’s hand
Stuck out waiting for someone to eat off it

No one could take the weight,
The burden of being an iniquitous man
Before, his hands were occupied  
Holding two different hands in each  

One let go too soon
The other held on too tightly
And now they were both gone
Slipping out of these deceitful fingers

I try to pray to you,
Oh God,
I try to pray.

I yearn to hear from you,
Oh Lord,
Hear what you say.

There's much to talk about,
My God,
Too much to say.

But how can I step to you,
Knowing how much I've strayed?

How do I kneel before you,
With this weight?

I judge me,
more harshly than you judge me.
More than one ought to be judged.

For I see the missteps that I take,
And the mistakes that I make.

Deliver me,
Oh God,
From my unforgiveness.

Save me from my personal hell.