My kisses must be toxic, poisonous.

Starving for love, they **** every chance.

I'm longing for affection, pure love.

I wonder if my eyes give it away.

The fear of being hard to love, toxic.

I lean in.

His lips feels cold on mine.

Am I as good as her?

Or will I never beat her?

How much do I matter?

I can't help myself..

When he looks at me does he think of her?

Wishing she was the one in his arms?

It's a dangerous game I'm playing.

Comparing myself to someone in his story.

Teary eyes, heavy chest.

Burning anxiety, trouble breathing.

Hours feel like days, days feel like years.

He's close, yet so far..

His eyes, so hard to ignore.

My cries to be understood, failing.

Am I asking too much?

A moment alone, and I wonder..

Summer's on it's end, are we too?

Underlying tension in the air.

Is a breakup near or is it just fear?

You're starting to peel my layers, coming closer to the truth..

Can you handle it?

Can I?

I can feel the darkness inside me again.

Fighting so hard to stay in the light where I wanna be.

Even if I can't win this battle,

please don't leave me..

Our bodies were shivering.

We held each other.

Surrounded by water, out in the lake.

The thunder and rain crashed around us and I felt your lips on mine.

Our feelings for each other were so real and intense in that moment.

The memories and moments we have will be my favourite movie to watch.

I lied.

I am afraid, like for real.

The empty promises from the past are haunting me.

Destroying this.

Biting my tounge, to not question.

A constant battle in my head.

The insecurities are there to remind me.

That no one ever stayed..

Soft songs playing from inside and I think about him.

How safe I feel in his strong arms.

How his hands feel playing with my hair.

I think about that night, up high on a climbing frame.

Like in a movie he went to the other side, just to hold me and protect me.

I noticed then and there that the way he looks at me feels like home.

I wonder how we've missed each other before.

Our paths have crossed but we didn't notice each other.

Maybe I wasn't ready for someone like him?

Someone who doesn't feel like butterflies and chaos,
someone who feels like a loving home.