Think I understand more than you give me credit for
Faces constantly changing, where is the one I adore?
Hands and heart try to hold you in the same place
Make you warm again, your fire I cannot replace
Hunger you selfishly follow around
Has you chasing heated urges, areas unfound
Hear you talk but never speak
The shivers say unspoken needs so weak
I love when you need my protection
You hate it, build a wall to guard imperfection
Abruptly attempting to cover up flaws
Our bodies fail, your effort has earned applause
It is too early to end the show you started
But beauty can be discovered in what's departed
I'd attempt one last time to say farewell if I were you
In cold weather lose words to feelings so blue
Locked in the past by mistakes you keep making
They've added up, now you're broken, aching
Time will repair, but can never rewind
Find strength to leave beloved memories behind
Your body may be a ****** battleground
Don't have to hide it when it's just me around
Wonder if you hide from my sight or your own
I dream of glimpsing the guilt and shame unknown
We both harbor a large reserve of regrets
Not totally hating eachother as good as it gets
Which one of us will come to our senses first?
I gave you my best, you treated me the worst
Like many others have done
You made me cry, used me for your fun
The thought of letting you do it again
Makes my blood cold as I write with my pen
Frozen, alone, you haven't moved, you won't try
Still in the exact spot I left you in, explain why
Leaving embarrassing defeats behind in the past
Is your only hope for a change that will last
Underneath layers of denial lurks hidden sin
Evidence laid out like a map on your skin
I offer a different path but you decline
On a bed of risky routine you'd rather recline
Perfect lips yet your words don't sound right anymore
Try to shut my ears but some itches I can't ignore
Vivid colors surrounding are not as vibrant now
My heart still hopes we'll end up together somehow
Each moment without our souls intertwined
Has been nothing but dark, your absence leaves me blind
Pain touches each and every emotion I feel
Beginning to realize some injuries don't heal
My heart cut open, love bleeding out
Want to believe, instead filled with doubt
The longer we linger, drag this on
Worse it will feel when we realize it's gone
I'm chasing laughter, stalked by fear
Running after closeness that no longer lives here
All the wrongs you hid so desperately from me
Too late to reverse and do things differently
Shut me out of your life when the only thing I ever wanted
Was to be next to you facing demons you alone confronted.

Another lonesome, night has passed
The same moon, gives random smile
Lost count of my sleep, being days
Memories rush in pile by pile

Thoughts linger of those left
The four corners of my room, cry with me
No one comes now for chats over tea
There is nothing left, in my eyes to see

Pale, flushed, dark begs hung by
These eyes have grown tired of blinking
Rush through these windows, O daring wind
And carry me away from this sinking pain

Take me to a place, where feelings don't exists
Away where I can forget everyone
Put me, then, in a deep deep sleep
Or just shoot me with a gun

Once and for all, these eyes would shut for good
Even my memories won't pile to project
Tears would no longer wet my pillows
Everything known, I'll just forget...


©sim

If you only understood how dear you are to me
How much I've discovered about the world
You could show me it jn reality
Slowly explore sure planet earth as it twirls

Distant corners in tucked places
Because I need to escape
If have you close instead of blank spaces
Can hide in the feelings taking shape.

Fear growing into hope
This may be what I have waited for
All that time I couldn't cope
And the nights spent crying on the floor

Love you for taking all that away
Emotions I couldn't erase on my own
You helped tear apart dismay
Made sure I didn't fight demons alone

You are there to lead without question
Willingly sacrificing your hand
Many times pulled out of depression
Supported two legs until they could stand

Rainfall pours down heavier now
Swirling and spinning in wet assault
To you surrender, my head bowed
Journeys diverging and it is my fault

Thank you for lovely time shared together
Our paths will always intersect
I'm grateful you threw to me a line
For our two hearts to connect

The colors in your galaxy
Fade, in your arms become blurred
Tonight the first page of our story
Presence told without one word

Hate that I miss you
You are not here with me
This is the way
Life isn't supposed to be

I wish I could tell you
How I want to run
Away from the darkness
And things come undone

You do not know how much it hurts
To hear words you say
Deep inside still knowing
It won't be okay

Scenery flies by so fast
Lifeless, dull, and grey
Memories come rushing back
Wish they would just go away

Hate that I still want you
I need to move on
It's so hard to accept the fact
That you are just...
Gone.