The UltraViolet Heart: Poems

718 · Jul 2018

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

You bathe in my radiance,
With your eyes closed,
Taking what you need from me,
to strengthen your bones.

You stick around,
Just long enough,
But now its time for you
To wander off.

I expect that you will soon return
To use me again,
So I wait patiently,
Here on spectrum end.

When you return
You will regret not wandering sooner,
This time too much of me
Might just destroy you.

I am
Ultraviolet

#ultraviolet #secondchances #rejection #love #africanwriters #wordporn

447 · Jul 2018

YOU

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

YOU

I kept the stubs from the movie of our first date,
And a vial of the sand we once walked on.
Snippets of words you've said to me
Commited to my memory.

I've seen so many face,
None of them feel like you,
None of them feel like your soul,
None of them feel like home.

I watch you
Day after day,
Standing in the doorway,
Waiting for you heart
With both feet at the entrance,
And my heart on my sleeve.

I remember what it feels like to hold you.
I could never forget that.
I could never forget you.

And in the doorway,
I realise,
That it was you,

Its always been,

YOU.

#love #heart #door #gay #free

406 · Jul 2018

Scars

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

Scars

I know the pain that you feel
You may not be able to overcome,

And;

Perhaps,
You can't mend those parts of yourself,

Perhaps,
They are meant to serve as a reminder,

But always know that
I will always be there,
To help you feel again,
To help you become vulnerable.

Even in the silence,
When there is so much to be said.

#scars #love #past #pain #africanwriter #gay #depression #loneliness

392 · Apr 2018

Living

The UltraViolet Heart Apr 2018

Living

5h30: First Alarm. Snooze. Urgh.                 Bed.

7h00: Awake. Running late.                          Hustle.

7h40:
Traffic selfie. To long distance friends.       Smile.

8h05:
Work. Cheeky wink from work wife.        "You look great"

12h00: Lunch. Rooftop Carpark                   The View.

17h30: Late afternoon coffee. Gym.             Motivated.

19h30: Home. Dinner.                                    Stuffed.

22h00: Bed.        Find something to be         Grateful             for.

#routine #motivation #friendship #love #smile #grateful

379 · Apr 2018

Ask Me To Stay 5/03/2018

The UltraViolet Heart Apr 2018

Ask Me To Stay 5/03/2018

When they talk about you,
They always talk about your heart,
"He has a good heart they say"
And I know,
I’ve seen it.

So if your heart is full.
Let me go,
So that the constant sneaking glance back and forth I give you can stop.
Let me go,
So I can learn to draw a line.
Let me go,
So that I can try and establish a friendship between us.
Let me go,
So that you can fill the void in your heart that I can’t.
Let me go,
So that you can be truly happy
Let me go,
If you don’t want to rest your head on my chest
Let me go,
So I don’t yearn for Eskimo kisses, or the feeling of your cheek on mine in the dark.
Let me go,
So that the songs on the radio don’t remind me of you
Let me go,
So that the voices inside my head don’t sound your name
Let me go.

OR

Ask me to stay,
So that I can finally hold your gaze
Ask me to stay,
So that we try to become more than friends
Ask me to stay,
So that our worlds can collide,
Ask me to stay,
Because you know you’re worth every ounce of love I have to give
Ask me to stay,
So that I can write poetry about us
Ask me to stay,
So you can be in energy of love, comfort and acceptance of your best and worst self
Ask me to stay,
So that you can see MY heart.

Ask me to stay...

#love #friendship #heart #leaving #stay #choice #decisions #unrequitedlove

360 · Apr 2018

Crutch

The UltraViolet Heart Apr 2018

Crutch

I wish that you hadn’t stolen glances at me from the rear view mirror;
I wish that you hadn’t gazed so hard into my eyes until my ears had turned red;
I wish you didn’t see all the good in me
I wish that I didn’t feel this way;

I wish we had the time;
I wish you had gotten to truly know me;
But if I can’t make you happy then someone else surely can.

So from now I will stop wishing.

I’ll stop wishing that you’d hold me
I’ll stop wishing that we’d share a life together
I’ll stop wishing that we would build a family
I’ll stop seeing myself fight for you daily
(Because I would have fought for you)

I had your back.
I am angry,
Because you led me on.
I am angry,
Because I realize now that I was the rebound.
But most of all,

I’m angry because we didn’t try.

But I am nobodies second choice.
Not now.
Not Ever.

#love #unrequitedlove #unrequited #wish #wishes #rebound #hurt #dream #poetry #ideal

353 · Jul 2018

Heartbeat

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

Heartbeat

Close your eyes,

Listen closely,

To the humming

of my heart;

When you hold me

#heart #love #africanwriter #gay #cuddle

350 · Jul 2018

Worth

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

Worth

Denying what you truly feel,
Only makes those feelings stronger.

So will you deny yourself,
By keeping me at a distance?

Will you chose to forget,
The way I once made you feel?

OR

Will you take that chance,
To get everything you have ever wanted?

The fact of the matter is,
I wont wait for you,
Even when you jealousy shows.

Because I deserve more,
Than a maybe.

#love #choices #worth #selfworth #selflove #africanwriters #gay

347 · Jul 2018

Rejection

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

Rejection

Blow to the gut,
Sought out and

DESTROYED.

Muscle Ache,
Tension,
Anger,
Insomnia,
Hunger.

Fool me twice,
Shame on me.

Acceptance,
Focus,
Perspective,
Progression,
Redirection,
Success.

#rejection #love #failure #success #recovery

332 · Jul 2018

Here

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

Here

My heart flutters,
At the thought
Of holding your hand,
Under the Northern Lights.

But
If you would have me,
As I am
And in this moment,

There is no place else I would
Rather be,

Than right here
And right now,

In the place where
We are meant to be

#love #poetry #wordporn #moments #spilledink #africanwriters

309 · Apr 2018

Puppet

The UltraViolet Heart Apr 2018

Puppet

What happens

when you have come to the realisation that

the sweet strumming of the strings you thought he played

was not that of your heart,

but the calculated skill of a master puppeteer.

#strings #love #control #abuse #emotions #awakening #manipulation

283 · Jul 2018

Soulmate

The UltraViolet Heart Jul 2018

Soulmate

Their eyes finally swing
Toward each other,

And all the rules,
Terms and conditions,
Fade away,

In a moment of

Fleeting Permanence.

#soulmate #love #falling #africanwriters #eyes

198 · Apr 2018

In the Sunlight

The UltraViolet Heart Apr 2018

In the Sunlight

He struggles to accept himself,
To reconcile sexuality with religion,
He fears that he would lose his friends,
He fears that he may lose his family,

But,
He realises that this is the path he needs to walk.

To walk alone.

But never in the shadows.
Never in the darkness.

No More.

The journey to come out takes time.
It has taken time.

His moms words echo

"Are you ever going to change,
Will you at least try?"

Destroyed.
But
Still he walks on.

In the sunlight.
Where its warmth kisses his skin.
He is who is.
Who he was always meant to be.

Free.

I am me.

comingout LGBTQ religion queer love truth acceptance heartache

— The End —