Time keeps ticking in my head
As I think of all the beasts
hidden beneath my bed

The tight space in my skull
makes me feel claustrophobic.
Out of breath,
to rethink every thought is aerobic

Wasting minutes as I reacquaint
with every regret  
Wishing I could breath and finally forget


But here I am,  listening
to that clock in my head
that keeps ticking

today,
i passed by a stranger.

she looked worried,
eyebrows bunched together forming little lines in between.

today,
i passed by the same stranger.

she look tired,
skin pale and lips peeling.

today,
i passed by the stranger once again.

she looked happy,
eyes as bright as the sun and teeth baring its refreshing white.

today,
i realized time does wonders for everyone.

the gray, dull me a few days ago was replaced by the shocking yellow i am and will forever be.

I am laying in this bed of ours
inside this home we've built
wondering why you wont touch me
all you speak of is your guilt

you tell me how you want to change
that you're needing to improve
and all the while I'm laying here
just wondering what to do

these millions of thoughts run through my mind
not one better that the next
it all leads back to the same old guilt
it seems I've failed the test

you say that you're happy
while you cry yourself to sleep
but the one who's most afflicted
is the one you choose to keep

I hate being so anxious that you’re falling for someone else because they complimented your hair and the way you like to dress.


I hate being so worried that you’re going to be in a hurry to leave me without a warning.


I hate being so scared that you’ll forget the love we shared and look for it with somebody else. 


I hate being so paranoid that you won’t come home one night and that you’ll be in another girls bed. 


But I guess I signed up for this, I knew my own minds tricks, despite this I still agreed to try my best  to trust you.

God I wish I knew what goes on inside your head