In my black forest I was passing through
To get to where the mountains grew
I came upon a pitiful sight
In the early morning just after night
Dew was still glistening on the ground
When I heard that crashing, growling sound
I knew a great bear was on a rampage
It was a pure white hot outrage
About to turn and go the other way
Blood curdling screams rebounded off the forest decay
And I knew I must go try to save the day

An occupied man had heen writing in his script
And over the baby cub he had tripped
Mother bear heard her baby's cry
And with red molten furry in her eyes
She was ripping that poor man apart
His blood was spraying with every claw mark



In order to get the furious bear away

I knew an incantation that I could say
I didn't want to hurt her it wasn't her fault
The careless man had triggered this assault


“Mother bear of the forest
This attack I can not warrant
Vanish all your angry claws
And your teeth from jaws
But do not discourage, and take heart
For as soon as you depart
You will regain your missing parts”

6:37 pm
Grabbing hands unwelcomed
Pinching my bones with your claws
Digging deeper and deeper into my flesh
Sap on my skin
Pine needles in my hair
An unwanted accessory
Thudding against the dirt
Pain striking my spine
His voice echoing still
He’s all I hear now
His ravenous eyes
His ****** fangs
Cry and cry as I will
Nobody will hear
As my ****** lungs tire
And my body imprints the dirt
I’m left to the wolves
Left to be feasted upon
And I cast a shadow on this man
Iron-pressed collars
Twiddling thumbs
What questions were asked?

Did she lead him on?
What was she wearing?
Is there any evidence?
Why didn’t she say something sooner?
If a girl screams alone in a forest,
Did she make a sound?

Me desespera ser tan yo
no se si es porque tengo el periodo
pero ya no me soporto
estoy harta de como soy
y no lo puedo cambiar
por mas que intente
y siempre me trae problemas
y mi inseguridad
y mi inmadurez
y mi falta de capacidad
y mi forma de dejar que cualquier cosa me haga mierda
soy una pendeja
estoy hasta la madre de todo
y no lo puedo cambiar
quisiera poder desaparecer a un lugar tranquilo
un bosque
y tomar muchas fotos y quedarme dormida
pero a la vez quisiera ser mas madura
no ser
como yo
a veces quisiera ser otra persona
mas segura mas madura con experiencia
como cuando llegamos a playa
era super segura
mas madura
valoraba todo
quisiera poder levantarme el animo yo sola, no necesitar de nadie
quisiera dejar de tener problemas hormonales
quisiera dejar de estar tan pinche loca
ser menos desesperada
pero para eso tendría que ser otra persona
porque yo ya intenté cambiar y no se puede
entonces me doy cuenta de que
preferiria morirme
pero no puedo
y mi hermana?
y tu?
y todos mis seres queridos?
y la gente que me quiere ?
y mi talento ?
entonces siento que nada tiene solución
y quiero explotar
y quiero llorar
y ser otra persona
y ser yo
y vivir
y morir.

Like morning dew set like a duvet over the frail grass

mist laying thick but yet frail and thin like glass


stars still glooming on Gaea's black arch far above

pines resting deep until dawn calm thereof


the silence only broken by a mourning dove

not breaking, being of the serenity one of


only at times as these I can feel at bay

my own doubts can not even make me sway


for once I feel whole...

walking through the woods i was surrounded by a plethora of golden bronze amber leaves tumbling in the wind sparkling with a star fire that evanesced from their jagged edges upon their descent.  i stood entranced, mesmerized, utterly hypnotized by their glorious magnificence.  i observed with intensity as a golden bronze amber leaf never having been attached to the majestic tree had no need to let go but gently released.  feeling no trepidation it wholly lacked desire for manipulation to control the forces of the wind.  i watched in awe and wonder realizing that it never disengaged from the tree knowing that separation is an illusion; it simply became the wind.  whirling it shimmered in the autumn sun as it wafted with no need for reins allowing its destination to unfold.  gingerly cascading it settled tenderly on the ground resting comfortably in ambivalence.  i sensed it did not cringe when it was picked up by an unsuspecting boot but intuitively knew immediately that it was being carried and dropped off serendipitously at an auspicious location.  i listened to it intently and drank in its essence as it simply lay in being not obsessing over what would happen consequent but sat in sheer stillness seemingly encompassing all totality.  i was stunned to see that it lingered without judgment in undivided clarity for what wild synchronicity would come.  it quenched its thirst in mystery while being completely at home in uncertainty.  the golden bronze amber leaf seemed one with all that is while simultaneously retaining awareness of self-perception.  as a gentle gust of wind coalesced with the beige fall sky it literally merged with the momentum enjoying the ride to its perfect destination.  with delicacy it rested cozily in ambiguity whispering to me that heaven is a state and not a place.  i vow surrender to black and white existence pledging fearlessly to climb higher creating life with vivid vibrancy adding golden bronze amber to my palette of colors with which i’ll paint.

©2016 janetaylor

The memory of what he did brought even more memories to mind
Slow at first but picking up speed, it's all starting to unwind
I don't want to look, I don't want to find
But when I close my eyes there they are right behind

It's been almost a year, but all these thoughts have come rushing in
Because it is mushroom season again
The woods I would have to go within
I always loved to romp about out there,but now thoughts twist and bend
Losing my sanctuary was the greatest sin

Dragging me out to my beautiful wood, so I could be his prey
The feel of the freash damp earth under foot, birds chirping in the trees, I will remember it ALL till my dying day

My hands tied behind my back, it would be easier for him that way
He pushed me to my knees, invading me from behind just like my step daddy did so a ****** I'd stay
He knew it would bring back those memories of my yesterday's

With that veil evil deed, so many things got lost
My woods, singing birds, the river's bend, what a cost
No more fishing, no more camping, no place to take off my disguise
No sanctuary to run to, all of this I'm starting to realize

He was an intelligently crazy
He was destroy the last place that was my safety
He was taking my last bit of joy I could get
He was very cunning in that, I'll have to admit

He found away to continue to bring me agony
After all these years he couldn't just let me be
He made my tormented life worse by many degrees
So now standing at the edge of the woods I freeze

He took my place
To feel warm and safe
New and catastrophic agony is now a cold fire inside
There is no place to hide
It's left me fighting hard not to end it all and die

Out in the woods I took a stroll
But the trial was getting mighty droll
So off into

Alone
   Darkness

Surrounded by fire and shadow
Lost within depths that darkness
Can never hope to conquer away.

Doubt
    Fear

Crying and hiding alone
Not a soul near for comfort
Solitary suffering in absence.

Crushing
    Desperate**

Where have you gone
And why can I not find thee?
You are a phantom in my heart.