A vulnerable heart got captured
In the middle of love war
Oblivious and lost
But eventually fell in love

The heart felt pain
Mourning for the lost
For the betrayal
The heart was broken

Before, it was once whole
Now it was shattered
Broken into pieces
But still live

Remembering the past
Trying to move on
Still mourning
The pain is still there

Blame the heart
For falling in love
The brain knew
But the heart denied

Now suffering from the pain
Wishing it to go away
Thinking of death
Wanting to be gone

Years passed by
The pain slowly fades
Memories are still there
But feeling numb and sad

Missing the old times
Didn't regret anything
But the heart ache
'Cause the heart's vulnerable

She hid behind a shiny smile
showing the world what they wanted to see
but always a prisoner inside her own body
chained to blood and bones

It won her praise
and it won her glory
Roses bloomed around her
while her soul withered inside

All the sparkly things lost their sparkle
when she stopped writing her own story
It was then in the moment of frailty
she realized she left herself behind somewhere along the way

The porcelain cracked and a brave woman broke through
stitching her heart and emptying her mind
of the stranger that had taken over
and the pain that had sustained

Beginning again vulnerable and naked
trembling with both excitement and fear
Praying that the world would accept her
as she introduced that girl that had been hidden for so long

Stones were thrown
and enemies crawled out of their alleys
attempting to drag her down
and crush her new found dreams

But a force field of love and acceptance
from those special souls that always knew who she was
carried her on it's shoulders
not allowing her to lay back down

A garden of confidence and self-love grew inside her
A hero was reborn
and so was the jolly
that had died with her long ago

Her smile is authentic now
and it shines brighter than ever before
A natural light that heals all who
are illuminated in it's glowing path

Merry songs escape her lips
and effervescent words flow from
her fingertips to the blank paper
as roses bloom inside of her

She's a prisoner no more.

Usually I hide away
Deep within my shell
I'm safe

Usually I just obey
Ignorance, I sell
I'm sound

Usually I do not say
And I dare not tell
I'm silent

Somehow, unlike anyone else
*You make me comfortable
When I'm vulnerable

chilling, careless smile,
your eyes perambulate the
caverns of my soul

I was clutching on tattered vines
Praying fervently to all that are divine
To let it hold
Please make it hold

I was gripping tightly on my last strand of faith (I'm slipping)
Just let me hold
Let my life hold

Then you pulled at me
And I went crashing
            d
                  o
                       w
                              n
So here I am with a shattered heart, a broken soul and a tattered gown.

The problem with us people
With all of our emotions
Overflowing ourselves
And spilling into each other
Is that while we are stumbling
Through our own blind confusion
We fail to remember
That there will always be things
We say but could never mean
Outweighing those
Many, many things
We could never say enough.

We said goodbye after what
felt like just moments after
we had said hello,
for even though months
had passed,
we had both always done
our best not to
share too much.

Although I have gone to great lengths
mastering how to be aloof,
in that moment I
regretted so much my inability
to emote.

"You make it seem so easy,"
he breathed,
his face welling with discontent,
and I kissed him on the cheek
as I whispered,
"I'm good at making things
look easy."

He had the sweetest demeanor,
and my body trembled
in the gentle strength and
aggressive tenderness with which
he kissed me,
a passionate, bittersweet
exchange, as we became aware
that it might be for the
last time.

I've become so good at
being alone that I had not
even pondered how I might
actually miss him
once he was gone.

I think my lack of visible reaction
hurt him, but I
couldn't bring myself to be
vulnerable, to let down
my guard and tell him
that knowing we were
parting ways made my
insides ache in the most
unexpected and terrifying way.

Maybe we weren't ever
meant to be anything;
that was my thought from
the jump.
But when he looked me in my eyes,
his heart was so pure,
and I yearned to touch
my soul to his.
I settled for combing my nails
through his curly hair
and murmuring sage words,
masking the things I refused
to feel.

He sent me on my way with
his favorite record, and I said
the most unscripted thing I ever had
to him,
that I'd always think of him
when it crackled and popped.

The kindness of what he extended to me,
the vulnerability I saw in his
beautiful, youthful eyes,
the way he softened his tough exterior,
it ate at me the whole drive home
as I cursed myself for being
so cold
and wishing I could kiss him
one last time.

I still haven't been able to
shed a tear, my heart too
frozen to thaw,
but as the Ray Charles
erupts from my speakers,
I stick to my word;
I think of him,
and I ponder on the possibilities
should we cross paths again.

Should that moment never come,
I can still find him
in the words of my poems
and hear him in the
rifts of his record, so I guess, for me,
it wasn't really
"goodbye."

There is always that super ****** moment
when you realize just how vulnerable you are.

When you have to come to terms with the fact
that the ***** that pumps the very life through your veins
lies in the hands of some other imperfect human.

You have given another the opportunity to touch a piece of you
that is buried so deep beneath the surface
that very few know what it looks like,
and chances are -
they will rip it out through your nostrils.

They have earned your trust
and they may decide to drag it down the highway tied clumsily to a towing hitch,
or put it in the microwave “just to see what happens.”

They could take your favorite songs and jokes and your favorite sweater
and make the very thoughts of them
sting like paper cuts in between the fingers that once laced with theirs.

They just might leave you broken;
a battered, bruised, scraped and bleeding loser of an unfair match.
Yet, for some irrational reason, you’re okay with it.

Although your greatest fear is the pain that comes with goodbye,
the warmth in their smile
and the way their arms open and envelop your insecurities
makes it entirely worth the risk.

The calm that accompanies their voice
as they gently tell you everything you’ve always needed to hear
far outweighs the terror
that they may strike a match in the gasoline filled chamber of your heart
and walk away from the explosion an unscathed hero,
the only exception being a ***** smudge of you on their forehead or cheek.

There is always that terrifying, paralyzing realization
that this other creature has the potential to destroy the same beautiful world they brought to life.

But the worst part?
Knowing that if they looked you in the eye and told that you you’re no longer needed,
as each word struck like knife after knife to the stomach..
You would take it all.

There will be no resistance, self defense, or retaliation.
You will be the collateral damage.
If that’s what it takes to make them happy.