I know
I'm stupid for wanting you
But you acted
Like you needed me too.
                                                      ( K R W)

I've been fighting with my heart
Woah you have no idea
How upset it is to me
When I said,
'You shall stop loving him'
It replies,
'Hellooww how could I?'
Then it keeps whining like,
'*****, you better call him now
Or Imma keep producing
Tears and damaging your brain
With memories of him'
But it doesn't understand that
If I do it, you'll be hurting too

I hope I know when you die
because how else am I going to lose hope then
how else am I going to know for sure,
that there is no more chance. No more nothing anymore..

I know it's a loser thing to be so occupied with an absentee, but does heart listen?
I know I will only forever lose hope when there is no more me or you.

Sometimes, life is all about regrets
Regrets about the hearts we break
Regrets about the risks we take
Regrets about the friends we make
Regrets about the words we say
Regrets about the path we choose
Regrets about the things we lose
Regrets about the secrets we share
Regrets about the secrets we hear
Regrets about the promises we make
Regrets about the decision we take
Yet,
no  regrets
Is all we say.

My grandma committed suicide
When I was six
I'm sure it was my fault
Was I not good enough?
Did I not meet your standards?

What did I do wrong?

My best friend
For seven years
Left me last year
For an unknown reason
Was I not kind enough?
Was I just too weird?

What did I do wrong?

Someone said I am stupid
Lazy
And dumb
Am I really?
Am I mentally ill,
Do you think?

What did I do wrong?

I don't know what I did
But it must have been me
It's always me

*What did I do wrong?

Nothing ever quite seems to get in my head,
I want to scream and constantly feel as if I'm brain dead.
I try to understand and help how I can,
Yet I end up feeling a pathetic excuse of your man.

There is nothing but hot air that resides up there,
A cloud of gas in my skull protected by hair.
I'm an idiot and am never of use,
I deserve to be sat there and yelled at with abuse.

Im impossible to work with, a pain in the ***,
When all I intend to do is help you be the one to pass.
Im failing school cause of how useless I am,
Its comes across to others like I couldn't give a ****.

I am a failure
I am a child
But this is never who I wanted to be...just simply cant help change the things I hate most about me

I try to get a grip of time
But I keep making love to a man that will never be mine
I caress more than his mouth
And he moans without doubt
Timely shadows of ecstatic instruments hit the wall
Until the clock strikes the end of it all..
  
Tobacco candies between my burnt lips
As he brush my many napes with his fingertips
Probably thinking about that girl he has deceived  
And just before he leaves
I Stifle the tears that i'll never be the queen on his deck
And he leans forward to give me a peck
     And nothing more
     After all, as he once said; i'm just his *****...

-fir.m

who is the girl
whose smile
reflects in your ocean eyes?
who is the girl
that prompts
that sly smile?
who is the girl
you haven't mentioned
but gives you
a reason to live?
who is the girl
who makes everything okay?
the girl
you fall asleep with
the girl whose petite frame
cuddles up next to you
whose small smooth hands
hold yours
as you walk in the dark
who is this girl
that has your heart?
I hear
her name
is Envy.