up the hill I go
on and on
up and up
I can't see the top

but that's not important
the journey is everything

by the campfire
alone in the night
with starry blanket
draped around me

looking down upon  the lake
I'm looking into the dreams
and the sadness
and the feelings

in the cold I shiver
in sadness , emptiness
I shake
Hush ! Lay down , go to sleep

I saw you again today
At the store
I was expecting boredom
Just saying hi to you again,
Made it much less boring

You got an earring,
And as always,
I'm suprised by your height.
But your hair isn't purple yet,
So I guess it's alright

It was only five seconds
Not long at all
But it made my hands shake,
And I didn't stop smiling for hours

Yet soon anxiety comes to visit,
You did this wrong,
You did that wrong
For goodness's sake,
You did EVERYTHING wrong!
I know,
I know

But then you text me.
I did not text you first.
I was so happy,
But I don't know why.

In all my life,
I've never met someone like you,
Someone who makes me ignore my flaws,
Who makes me shake something awful.
Who I trust so much.

I know this isn't a poem,
But it's just a story,
I wanted to share.

I don't know what to do when I'm in front of you
I tend to get nervous about your every move
I don't mean to be so tense
Just want to know what must be done
My heart shakes because of you

I try to act different when you're around
I don't want you to hate me
I really like you
How can you shake up my heart furiously?

Beaty eyes
they stare into me.
Beaty heart
I feel the shake.
Beady sweat
between brows gather.
Beaty bodies
we feed the anxiety.

in reverse trendelenburg
hot blood flush rushes
to my face
vision blanks the time being
and scarlet feverfew dreams
come with bills of ignored mail
why did they pour sand all over my bed
Im helplessly brushing notes
of blackbird wings
all because I wanted to give up

I said I never leave you but its
4am and I'm out here alone and
its freezing and I'm shaking and I'm
sorry that I lied.

My blank eyes stare
In bold frustration
At the white sheet
Sitting, calmly mocking me
On the plain brown table

The pen quivers in hand
My mussels shake with shame
But try as I might
My ideas are insanely sane

No bursting fits of passion
Or inspiring metaphors
Only a page covered in splatters
From my ink of internal wars

A block of metal in my mind
A chain of iron on my hand
Glossy mirrors on my eyes
Spiking needles in my thighs

Calling for me to get up
To leave this terrible attempt
But when a poets mind is blank
Like mine
About blankness will they find a rhyme