#sexualabuse poems on Hello Poetry

Valarola Nikola Jul 2018

The demons just want me to be dead,
They want to bury the secrets in my head,
Sunlight kills their dark souls,
And there's no light to hold,
I'd give anything for a savior,
Give my firstborn as a favor,
I just want to not fight for every breath,
To not fight inside my own head,
I'm so tired, so tired, so tired,
And the voices multiply like a choir,
They tell me what to say,
To make everyone think I'm okay,
But inside I'm punching myself over and over,
And I try to quiet it by not being sober,

But you can't stay high forever,
I always nose dive and take a header,
Straight into the ground of which I bleed upon,
This life just seems played out and done,

I'd pray to God if I didn't think he'd forsaken,
This child of which followed him with other children,
But then I found the dark side of life,
The kind that has no spark of life,
Who's dull eyes stare out from sunken skulls,
Knees aching on basement floors,
Don't be fooled by the bible,
The devil is a female,
And she takes innocence,
While faking she's innocent,
So beware of golden hair,
And skin that's fair,
Because it'll make you wish for death,
For the rest of your entire life,

But you can't stay high forever,
I always nose dive and take a header,
Straight into the ground of which I bleed upon,
This life just seems played out and done.

#sexualabuse #childhoodtrauma #sobriety #alcohol #drugs #sober #depression #suicide

YourNightLight Jun 2018

Hush, hush

Little girl with the large, dark eyes.
Adorable & innocent, nothing to sexualize.
Man in black with the twisted mind.
Never thought or perhaps cared just how much he would put this little girls life in a bind.
She did not speak for a long time.
No recollection but over time, there's things she would find.
No justice was delivered.
No recognition, it seems.
Everyone has buried the trash.
No more talk about the past.
Hush, hush.
Woman with the large, dark eyes.
She holds anger & silently cries.
Hush, hush.
Keep it all inside.

#sexualabuse #hush #quite #little #girl #man #abuse #*** #sad

Sydney Gretha Mar 2018

#timesup

every 98 seconds
a person is shattered like a piece of glass
or perhaps in the view of the perpetrator,
used and discarded like a piece of trash

#metoo #timesup #sexualabuse #sad #broken

Kartikeya Jain Apr 2018

Time to turn the page

Have you ever stared
at a blank piece of paper
for so long
it starts turning into
a concert of unanswered questions
posed by a teenager
who is awakened
about his sexuality
which was long repressed
under the secrets
he was asked to keep
the things he had to hide
the pain he slid under the carpet
with a smile on his face
he was no snitch
he liked keeping
the paper blank
he was a good boy
who could keep things with him
the boy was in deep sleep,
that boy, he was in deep sleep,
and now he is awake
he knows what he lost
he knows what's good and
what's bad
he knows
the world will question him
why he didn't speak earlier
why now
why now
why now
the world will eat him up
but he knows at this point
nothing matters to him more
than what he lost
than what is ahead
give me my childhood
give me my childhood
give me my childhood
he screams
he stutters
he cries
I am done
I am awake
I am free
it's time to color this page black
it's time to turn the page.

#poetry #sexualabuse #harassment

Quinn Evans Mar 2018

Have You Ever Felt Like Me?

Have you ever felt like me,
When the path it seems is to hard to see?
I feel too vile,
I need to smile,
I need to scrub my body clean.
Have you ever felt like me?

Have you ever felt like me?
Carving words into your skin,
Just wishing you could fit in?
Have you ever felt like me,
Where the pain you feel is never enough?
When people tell you 'Just be tough!'?
This life of mine is not a breeze.
Have you ever felt like me?

Have you ever stared at the road,
Outside in the cold,
Wondering when you’ll get your next meal,
Thinking is this real?
Have you ever felt like me?

Have you ever felt that there’s a creep,
Making you lose so much sleep?
You can’t stand on your own two feet?
Have you ever felt hated?
Did you think life was so overrated?
Have you ever felt like me?

Have you ever felt like me?
Have ever wished for your own death,
Asking God to take your last breath?
Have you ever felt so much pain,
That it feels like an endless rain?
Have you ever felt like me?

Have you ever swallowed pills,
Have you ever wanted to be killed?
Have you ever felt invisible?
Like you weren't noticeable?
Did you ever feel like a disease?
Have you ever felt like me?

Have you ever asked for a saving grace?
Did you feel saved?
The pain I had was a blessing,
It never left me second guessing.
I will inspire,
And I will feel admired.
And now I finally see.
Have you ever felt like me?

This poem is about me being abused, neglected, depressed, about hating myself. I was in a dark place. IThe dark place still exists. Sometimes right on the surface.

#suicide #depression #abuse #sexualabuse #neglect

Wounded Warrior Feb 2018

Breathless

Breathless..
I could hardly breathe
Gasping desperately for truth.
My naked soul stood trembling,
Beaten & bruised.
My heart lays there in pieces.
In such a vulnerable state.
I stare out into the world,
Do loving people still exist?
Searching for answers.
I stumbled upon some angels.
Love, patience, kindness.
Those were the angels characteristics.
I got to feel understood & loved.
Ointment put unto my wounds.
Directed through the mystery of love.
Am I prone to misery though?
Misery somehow finds me wherever I go.
People throw these little arrows at my heart.
I try to shield myself but I'm much too weak.
There's all these holes and scars on my soul.
Too tired to speak up anymore.
The sadness in the silence interrupts my peace.
Breathless...
I'm gasping for truth that I fear I will never find.

I've been in therapy for the last year dealing with my childhood ****** abuse & eating disorder. Therapists and other mental health providers have been like angels to me. The pain & misery seems to keep finding me. Tired of the long journey. So much beauty in one human being helping another. Don't give up, rest.

#childhood #sexualabuse #therapy #journey #truth #searching #fear #pain #misery

Fritzi Melendez Feb 2018

Hermes' inJustice

I've been thinking more about you recently.
...No, not like that. Don't get the wrong idea,

Again.

You come back into my mind like the text notifications that would light up my phone.
Only this time I can't press the block button,

Again.

It's an odd feeling, a sort of confusion that gives me anger.
But I don't want to try and figure it out,

Again.

I was vulnerable, alone, suicidal, depressed, and you knew that.
You took advantage of me with your manipulative "I love you"'s

Again.

I fell for it, I was weak, and I loved you for awhile, I truly did.
Until you made me take off my clothes and give you a show,

Again.

It was intimate, for the first couple of months I thought.
But you began seeing me more as your ****** object,

Again.

But I wanted to believe you loved me.
So I opened my skin for you to make your home in me,

Again.

Did you deserve that? At the time, I thought it was only right.
But giving you my ***** home was my mistake,

Again.

The cycle continued, manipulation of *** for my dignity.
My identity was at stake, I was scared to hear you say,

"Again."

Silenced by threats that would expose me more than the skin I showed you.
So I, weak and stupid, fed into your fantasies

Again.

Emotional turmoils arose if I didn't give you what you wanted.
And I, depressed and scared of being alone, endured the hurtful words,

Again.

I had let your words define my worth.
I was nothing more but just someone who deserves this hurt,

Again.

There's a reason I stayed, but I feel like it was more rather for me than you.
I feel like some days I wanted this pain, or that I deserved it,

Again.

My trust was tattooed on your hand, my heart tattooed on your foot.
Never realizing the damages you left in me,

Again.

As you began to rattle my rib cage to wake me,
Asking me for more, and more, until I bled out my soul,

Again.

Forceful grabbing, soulless insults, groaning and yelling,
Then you'll leave, high and dry, for hours until you were ready to start,

Again.

My body shakes, my mind in disarray, buzzed like bees in a can.
I wept as I had to bandage myself,

Again.

You broke me as easily as a porcelain doll.
And I laid there, numb, as you kept moving your hips faster,

Again.

My body turned cold, as my heart packed its bags to leave.
I neglected myself, all for you, but you just wanted to keep going

Again.

You probably didn't care that I said I couldn't feel a thing.
You covered my mouth, ripped off my clothes, and forced yourself through,

Again.

Stating that I'll feel you inside, I'll feel our love in my chest.
But I cried and all I could feel was the yearning to slit my neck,

Again.

I had many breaking points, but none the worst as the last.
I was ready to give my tired body to the Reaper's arms,

Again.

And so I did, I left without a care of whatever you were going to do.
No matter how many threats and insults you shoved into my ear once

Again.

You wanted my hollow body that echoed your voice of "Take it off for me,
Again."
And I stab myself through my stomach, slice myself in half, rip you from the grip you had around my heart, snip your gnarly fingers from my brain, and say

"No."

Getting closure of the abuser I stayed with for 8 months.

#sexualabuse #abuse #manipulation #threats #disgust #*** #hurt #depression #suicide #closure

natalie Feb 2018

#nomore

"i'd rather die," i say, with your fist pressed to my cheek
"i need you here," you say, as you cry...
my face is bleak.

#trigger #abuse #physicalabuse #emotionalabuse #sexualabuse

Wounded Warrior Jan 2018

Girl in the Mirror

Hello you,
That girl I see in the mirror.
You are much too ******* yourself.
Don't you see how precious you are?
Why do you keep hurting yourself so much.
I know you're in an immense amount of pain.
But you didn't cause all this.
I repeat...
You did NOT cause this.
Please stop blaming yourself.
You did not ask to be sexually abused, not with your body, not with your smile & not with your lack of words.
A child doesn't hold responsibility for an adults actions.
Your silence makes sense, you were scared & confused.
If he's done this to others it's not your fault.
Do you hear me? Not your fault.
Stop carrying around all this shame that isn't yours to carry.
No wonder your heart feels so heavy.
I know you stared straight at me and said you give up, that you no longer will allow another human being into your heart.
You don't mean that. You are hurting.
There are safe people out in the world.
And I want you to know that even when you can't look at the bright side, I will sit with you in the dark until you are ready to come out.
Just don't give up.
Brighter days are coming.
Allow others to hold hope for you when you've run dry of your own hope.
The truth eventually will set you free.
It will.

#sexualabuse #hope #blame #fear #anger #depression

Terra Marie Jan 2018

Closet Monsters

Night.

In my mind, night symbolizes bad things
Dead as night,
Things go bump in the night,
Missing each other like ships in the night,
Thieves in the night,
“A one-night stand?”
Lady of the night,
“Oh my God! How can you sleep at night?”

It is universally known that monsters come out at night
They lurk in the closets of kids everywhere
But closet monsters with their reaching claws, twelve eyes, four arms,
And purple fur aren’t as scary as you.
In the dark corner of my room by the lamp that was my mom’s
When she was growing up
Did you put your hands on her, too?

I look up and
Coming towards me
a gangrene riddled zombie
Arms outstretched, a child whining for candy
Hot mouth on my skin, saliva in my face
Tongue like tentacles wrapping around me and
I fall into that dark, unfeeling place

Night is when bad things happen to good people
When too-young children lose their too-young innocence,
I try to explain to my mom the things you did
Why I’m chasing light
She says I’m lying because you’re her father
She knows you, and you wouldn’t do that to her
I tell her it was night-time she says,
“Maybe it was too dark to see who it was.”

“It wasn’t, mom!” I scream.
Hot pokers in the form of hot tears sear my red cheeks
When she turns away from me

It was dark, that night
But not so dark that I didn’t know you that night,
That night when you took me and crushed me
And I didn’t have a choice.

But it was you.

A gangrene zombie hiding in dark corners of my bedroom.

Poem for an abused friend of mine. You can overcome anything, R. You're amazing.

#abuse #sexualabuse #triggerwarning #trigger #dark