I've watched many a documentary since you've slipped from my arms
Sinking deep into the earth, becoming part of the spiritual world.
I've read many a book and focused only on school since you've
evaporated into the sunny atmosphere above my blonde head.
The most recent documentary, Cosmos, is all about what is around us
and how insignificant we are in such a vast and expansive universe.
When I watch it, I think of you of course
And I can't help but think how insignificant our problems are
in such a vast and expansive universe...
And I can't help but think how foolish it was to fight.
The Australian Aboriginal people believe in something called
"The Dreaming"
Where the earth was once covered all in water
And the "creative-spirits" came from the water...
Forming the mountains, the plains, the animals, and the people.
Then, when done, the rest of their energy
Went up into the heavens to become the constellations
Or down into the earth.
It's funny to compare, but I feel like you were a creative spirit in my life.
You came, and conquered my heart.
You came and captured my soul, bringing me joy and light and happiness.
You painted beautiful ideas and wishes and dreams and imprisoned them into my being.
And then, when all of the energy you could give was expelled...
You were gone.
Different parts of your spirit flew up into the heavens or sunk into the ground.
And now, you're constantly all around me.
I see your shadow in the things you liked and the things you disliked
I feel your unspoken and spoken words.
I can never look at an apple again without thinking,
"He really hated apples"
Not that this is necessarily a bad thing, because it's not.
Sometimes I do cry.
Sometimes I do get very angry at myself or at you...
But I never think, "I regret that relationship."
Because I simply do not.
Everything,
and I mean Everything
happens for some kind of Purpose.
Our "Dreaming" was meant to begin in those cobbled streets of Prague
and end in a desperate and angry text message.
Our "Dreaming" was meant to make an impression on our hearts.
Our "Dreaming" was meant to create a beautiful painting of two people who loved each other so much, they could not even be together.
And then our creative spirits were meant to become the constellations
and the earth we walk upon so that someday
we would truly appreciate the person we
were really meant for.
Maybe, maybe we are meant for each other.
Maybe, we just need more time.
But I know I can say with one thing certain
in my heart,
I loved you. I love you. And I always will.
