Oft have I paused to think upon faith and what makes it strong.
The faith to be wise and to know right from wrong.
No not the faith that gives rise for Gods to be born.
But the strength and belief to fight when I am most torn.
I speak of the faith to believe of who I might be.
The faith to know with conviction its enough to be me.
A faith to be sure and a faith with no doubt.
No mumbles in meekness but a voice raised in shout.
So long since my faith was so raised up on high.
So little belief now that there is nought else but to cry.
What can be done to restore faith that is now lost.
With each thought and contemplation at additional cost.
So low now on faith... did I ever really believe?
Perhaps all along... not faith... but only... self deceive?
How can I live a life where all belief of self has faded away.
To what point, without my own faith, to greet the next day.

It’s a crazy world we live in
Feeding doubt with fear
Living in regret
Year after year
Thinking of a dream
But is it ever near?
You’ll only live a happy life
If you per-sue this one career
But is that what you want?
Or what you’re brainwashed
to believe?
You’ve been taught to work for life
So that you never have to leave
Forever incomplete
As we search for finish lines
We’ve been running for so long
That now we’re running out of time  
Living life to die  
While we’re dying to live  
Cause this empty pointless life
Has nothing to give

So many days spent wishing to be somewhere, with someone.
Endlessly needing to feel that someone somewhere needs me.
So tired of feeling and being empty. So empty from feeling tired.
So tired of just being.

Moving from nothing to nowhere and back again. Some days just too tired and empty to even deal with nothing and nowhere. Never changing, never varied and oh so never ending.
So tired of just being.

Repetition that drains, that saps, that devours and consumes.
Eating away just a little more of who I was, who I can be.
Eroding piece by piece who I was and how I see myself.
So tired of just being.

Pointless, aimless, redundant so totally without purpose.
Devoid of reasons to wake and no rest though I sleep.
So much time wasted, abused, misused, cursed and loathed.
So tired of just being.

all this study
for something I never loved
            -in a world full of judge-
for an exam I'll never pass
and even if I did,
life wouldn't care a bit

The Mind spoke to the Soul one day.
"Over all the others, why did we choose this Body? It isn't the easiest, I must say."

The Soul shrugged and replied, "Well, you always liked a challenge at the end of the day."

The Mind snapped back " No, YOU liked the challenge. I just agreed with the one you liked, say what you may."

"NO, it was YOU who did the picking...."

And as they both bickered, the Body did all in its power to betray the rationality of the Mind and the purity of the Soul.

vomitting words
that don't really matter

Like a guilty dog looking
at a chewed discarded shoe.
You amused me,
I used you.

Did I have to tear you?
Did I really have a choice?
I knew I didn't care for you
or the bla bla of your voice.

Now I drink and start to think,
I must be more than this.
Breaking young and hopeful hearts
with just "I'll call you" and a kiss.