I'm laying in bed wishing I wasn't here alone. I trim my bangs and cut my hair to feel satisfied with myself. I pray to God, to keep me with my lover.
I don't eat much and I haven't swam yet. My lover came to see me but as soon as he left, I felt guilty of myself. My failure. I entered into a panic attack and as a result, laid in bed and listened to Pink Floyd; wishing to be in his arms again.
He makes me laugh and smile. He squeezes me so hard that I feel my lungs collapse. He touches me gently as a rose. He plays with my hair and kisses it. I hear his breath near my ear and I feel in a dream. He's the lover, I don't really know but I want to create a family with him and die by his side. I think I might break without him... He just left but I barely remember how he looks. It's just the love that I have that keeps this going. I get on my knees and pour my eyes out because I want him to love me and to never leave my side because I want to be with him. I might break without you so please don't go!
To my lover (Gavin Pasho)
