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Growly Wolfus Jan 2020
You don’t know how I felt
How you felt
How I felt
How we both felt the same
All the anger and pain
From your sick little game
You called love

You don’t know how I loved
How I yearned
How I craved
To be something I wasn’t
Someone who doesn’t
Get lost in the present
With you

You don’t get how I felt
How I was
How I am
You made me something else
Changing ourselves
Something I never wanted
To be

You don’t know how I hated
How I loved
How I hated
Your bittersweet words
That were more of a curse
Than a blessing for someone
Like me

You don’t know how I cried
How I sobbed in the night
How I lost all the light
All of it trapped inside of your hands

I cried from the pain
How my soul is forever stained
By the darkness you seeped into
My heart

These tears aren’t for you
They never will be
They are mine for only me and myself
For the hatred you left
Behind on that cliff
As the wind swept you farther away

I cry for myself
How I caused you to leave
How I made you feel how you did
How I didn’t understand
How I couldn’t understand
What you were always telling me

“I love you”

You saved me, then hurt me
Loved me, deserted me
Left me behind to rot
I loved you for how you were
You loved me for what you saw
And for what I only showed and wanted you
to see

You don’t know I felt
And now, you never shall
I don’t know how you felt all the same
It’s not fair how you left and now I have to
live without you

You ruined my life
Committed suicide
Destroyed my pride
Left me behind to die
alone in this world without you

You don’t know how I felt
How I hoped to tell
“I love you” to you someday

I’m the cause of your hate
You just couldn’t wait
long enough for me to say
Those three words

You don’t know how I felt
And these tears aren’t for you
They’re for me and all of my failures
Abandoned here in this world
I can’t be myself
ever again

You were the disease
I wanted to catch
The only cure for me
Have you ever been left behind?
Nina Dec 2019
Everyone leaves
And i wondered
Why wasn't i enough
Then i realised
I was too much
For them to handle
I was more than enough
Sky Oct 2019
I'm lying here, my thoughts are scary
The lessons had I want to bury
Not one but two the same mistakes
I dove in deep, now what a mess
I do not wish to change the past
The things I said, I feel embarrassed
Layed out my feelings out to you
Rejection stabbed my heart right through
You said you care, that's ******* really
The way you let me go so freely
Embrasing love you have for her
Until the day she'll want you gone
When that day comes, I'll be no more
I won't know what she has done
Plans don't work out the way we want
I hope that you just don't get hurt
Because of fear of leaving her
You tell yourself you love her more
That things'll get better, she'll keep a job
If not, you'll move to another land
And that's your life plan, baby her
So stick with that, I've shut my door
I can't escape, we work together
I'm sure that I won't last in there forever
The beauty is, I'll learn to cope
You've pulled away, there is no hope
The lies you told, that shattered me
I do not trust you, stay away from me
Maybe one day she'll know what happened
But you'll tell her, I never mattered
She'll never know you loved me once
And saw our future in advance
I told you how compatible we are
But I was wrong, we're not by far
Don't call me friend, we're way past that
Damage control you're trying won't last
I do forgive you but all you'll see now
Is a fake smile on me, in my eyes you fell down
Got myself into this mess and now I'm stuck
Farewell my dear friend, we really ****** up
Josiah Bates Oct 2019
The sky over peach hill
Was dulcet last I looked,
Without a hint of clammy March
In the middle of a bright July

The sky over peach hill
Had clouds surrounding the kites,
My girl and I would stare for hours
As hot-air balloons passed by

That sky over peach hill
Ever soft, ever sweet.
That was the place where I found
That life passes in a sigh

The peaches fell,
And august came.
My girl went away,
I was left behind.

The sky over peach hill
Looks a little darker now.
But I know once winter ends
The kites will fly again
Jaden Sep 2019
You go out late
at night, and i stay here,
picking up the pieces
of the mess you left behind.

(i am the mess you left behind
and i spend the night
picking up the broken
pieces of myself
.)
9-10-19
© XPY 2019
eli Sep 2019
i cant speak
and open up my feelings
but i am not mute

i always listen
but whenever i try to explain
i am not being heard
maybe they're deaf.
its hard to reach out when no one wants to hear you out.
fray narte Jul 2019
I let myself
make sanctuaries
in the crest of your lips;
they were eventually
washed away by the rush
of midnight coffees.
I let myself spell out your name
with the first letters
of my unsent emails
in exchange for a sigh of poems.
I let myself kiss the rims of my teacup
the way I kissed you
two days before you left.
I let myself ignore
the pile of dishes
to trace the tile grouts
that connect to your heartbeat,
and it led to a void
of dismantled veins
and arteries.

I let you
leave the littlest
specks of your scent
on my pillows,
I let you
dance with me
like my favorite sunset hue
danced with the sky
and soon,
the dusk came
and the music notes
and the piano tunes
all faded away.
I let you
write your name
in-between the lines
of my favorite songs
and now all I got
are mixtapes that scream
for you to come back,
darling, as if the cracks in my  voice
and the rips in my lungs
weren't enough.

I let you
sparkle like a big-city-dream
to small-town girl;
let you carve your lies
at the tip of my cigarettes.
I let myself
dream of cuddle nights
and picket-fence
kinda happy ever afters.
I let myself
walk in pj's
and bask in the ruins
of the weekend
that you left.

And darling,
maybe it wasn't because
you didn't love me;

maybe it was because I didn't love myself.
Nina Jul 2019
My friends asked me
Who is that guy?
Is he your boyfriend?
You always go out with him?

And all I can say is.
We are just friends.

Obviously it seem like a lie
But it's the sad truth
There was nothing more between us.

My workmates asked me
Do you have a boyfriend?
Who is that guy in your phone?
He's your boyfriend right?

And it pains me to say
He's just a friend

Every single time
With tears in my eyes
With the stinging pain feeling to say it out
We were just friends
Or used to be at least.
AnxiousOcean May 2019
I am not very certain
if being alone makes one strong.
Because if it is,
then I'd rather be weak.
You've always wanted me to be strong,
to be better, to be cold, to be a stone;
yet all I've ever wanted is for you to stay.
Would you consider me weak?
I care not--
even Adam needed an Eve.
Maybe I am not afraid to be alone;
I'm just afraid that you'd leave.
:')
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