Nothing matters to me
I might as well be
In a different galaxy
I’m disconnected from reality
I sleep my nights dreaming
I could be someone else
And lose sight of me

I hate my anatomy
Chemical bonds gone wrong
And I choose to dissect
Each and every one
I never lose focus when I criticize
My imperfections
I intend to improve myself
But that won’t change my perception

And there you go
I figure you’re prefect
In every sense of the word
Nothing can stop you
Not even the cosmos themselves

But you’re just like me
A flawed human
In this world full of impurities
We bend like metal
And sway
Wherever the wind takes us

That’s the price we pay
Each and every day
Our insecurities
Hide the best of us
But we wake up in the morning
And continue life

But one thing for sure
We’ll keep fighting  
Until we perish
Life can be beautiful
Never forget it

i wish i could be art

Make up is my Arsenal
Its one of the many mask a I wear.
Like a warrior going into battle I fair well.
My enemys yeild with every stroke I apply.
I wonder when will I stop this lie..
Myself self wealth, self esteem, self conscious. Selfish I am allowed to be. Allowed to grow like a ****. Beauty in my eyes. In my color. In my tides. I pray to god to bring me beauty. To bring self love. Medicine to my soul so i can finally fix ever hole. Hold me in your arms. Hold my face to the mirror so I can think. Finally I am beautiful.

I saw them decorating the whole place,
& decorating me;
    the thing to be sold,
    the burden which since my birth they did hold,
     the burden from which today they will get free...

I saw them giving me so many blessings,
& also listened to their relaxed breathings,
   Cause their biggest tension is soon going to end,
In my whole life after those seven rounds I found them most relaxed...

I saw them giving my hands in the hands of a boy, to me a stranger,
I wonder are they the same who kept me away from boys, from that lover?

I saw them packing in my bag
so much of gold & insurance paper of the new dowry's car,
   but they forget my love, my guitar,
I saw people asking them -
       "Does she know cooking?
     Is she good at house holding?"
But nobody bothered to ask,
      Was I still breathing???

& at last tearing they took me to a car,
& told me,
"Take care of your new family,
            & your husband"
the one who has got a new servant!!!
As I looked in the car I saw them smiling cruelly,
& as I looked back,
I saw them smiling,
& those momentary crocodile's tears ending,
I saw them relaxed & calm ,
Having got freedom of the biggest burden & a very big duty...

her thoughts race wildly around her mind,
each one overlapping the last
all screaming for her attention, causing pain to burst from behind her eyes
loneliness screams at the back of her mind
insecurity speaks lowly, whispers somehow echoing louder and louder
doubt creates a fog, muddling into confusion
but anxiety, the loudest voice of all, overpowers everything - becoming all she can hear through the noise

I will do the things
I'm afraid to do

I will drive a car without thinking of
Hydroplaning and rear-endings
I will carve my name into walls
Without thinking about vandalism
I will write this poem on my phone in the bath
Without thinking about electrocution
I will talk to the tall looming figure,
Whoever they may be,
Without looking down on myself
I will read you this poem
Without thinking its even true
I will tell my friends I love them
Without needing them to need me
To love them
 I will tell everyone I'm scared
Without thinking about it being true
I will leave home
Without thinking about comfort
I will get a job
That isn't always comfortable
I will make things that don't have power
Without thinking they need to have power
I will flirt and fall into some arms
Without thinking about the falling part
Or whose arms they are
And I will make love
And I will push away my love
And I will make love with someone else
Without making myself think about
The others I've made love to

But I will think about the others
I've made love to
Because they may not always seem worth
The fear I had to drown in
In order to gasp for air
And I will quit my uncomfortable job
Because I will think I have the right
To never be sweaty under the eyes and arms
And I will delete my friends
Because I stopped talking to them
A year ago when I made love the last time
and quit my job
And I will move back home
And I will stop driving myself elsewhere
And I will stop letting the world know
I have a name
And I will stop writing poems in the bath
And I will stop taking baths,
And I will stop writing poems

And I will try to do these things
I'm afraid to do.