It’s alright
If you are afraid my friend
You can think about the past
And who you owe an apology
But I’m not the one
Who sees the things you try to hide

Yeah that’s right
I remember you from back then
And even though it didn’t last
It’s still a great memory
But I’m not the one
Who left the sadness all behind

You were always so far from here
What you thought about
The time that passed
Why you decided not to stay
But you never knew
What you thought about yourself
Were things I never felt about you

Ok, you’re right
But why not try again?
You said the die was cast
And you don’t relive history
But I’m not the one
Who kept his feelings on the inside

It’s not something that happened
It was just part of living
And the mistakes you think you made
Are the one’s I’m forgiving

You were always so far from here
What you thought about
The time that passed
Why you decided not to stay
But now you know
What you thought about yourself
Were the things that made you go

In my life I’ve loved several people who have been fires

And when I say fires, I don’t mean that sappy ******* like igniting a spark in me that fueled happiness and joy -

No. They were the fires that destroy entire forests, scorching anything in its path once lit.

At first I thought the warmth they gave was radiation of love

only to realize that the flames of jealousy,

manipulation, and control consumed me like oxygen,

coughed me up like smoke-filled lungs,

and left my body and mind in ashes.

I’ve been burned, and once flesh is scarred it never looks or feels the same.

But skins cells regrow, and burned down forests do too.

Raspberry pip boy lingered and hung around,
He was sweet, but with a tartness that juiced up your mouth,
He flowered in Spring, and swelled my heart up through Summer,
And I plucked him, and I ate him, and I begged for another,
But as I chewed up, my heart slid down my back,
As I was gulping down raspberries my tooth had cracked,
The raspberry pips had sunk deep and rooted
In between my poor teeth, how I hollered and hooted
"RASPBERRY PIP BOY ISN'T AS SWEET AS YOU THINK,
HE STAYS FAR TOO LONG, I'M STAINED BY HIS INK.
I CAN'T WASH HIM OUT, BELIEVE ME I'VE TRIED,
THAT RASPBERRY PIP BOY HAS JUST RUINED MY LIFE!!"
A former tooth model, my contract was lost,
To that Raspberry Pip Boy, his seeds, and tooth rot.

I sometimes wonder what you told her
And what she told you
All those things I said in passing
I assumed were said in confidence
The secrets that bled from your lips to hers
I've thought about your little talks
And whether you were really "just friends"
'Cause it seems more like you were spies
Plotting against me
Discovering my weaknesses
What would hurt me
What would **** me
I wonder if you knew
How much it hurt
When you'd disappear
And I'd find you were with her
I never claimed to be the jealous type
But somehow you brought out
The worst in me.

Our hearts frozen to ice
We were two glaciers drifting
Our presence engraved into the ground below
We were meant to last forever
But something between us broke
Now we spend eternity
Apart

they dont understand
and im wondering why you ever
thought they did

I don't want to go to sleep
for I am afraid that you will be there
You will be right beside me
and everything will be like it was
That isn't even the nightmare
No the nightmare begins when I open my eyes

You are no longer there
and that is when the true pain begins
I can't go back to sleep
so Night again becomes the Enemy
My old familiar Friend
The late night sounds and music
that fills my room is starting to feel like home

*Who needs sleep anyway?

Lilac winter skies
My warm skin against cold fists
Handprints left on me

Purple finger prints
Embedded into my arm
That's how you showed love

Loved you in the fall
Was scared of you by winter
Stayed until summer

Science has told me
In seven years, I'll have skin
Never touched by you

Patiently waiting
For the day filled with relief
That will never come

I'm trying to convince myself
I know what something slow
And steady looks like.

But who can I fool
When I still recall so vividly
How on day two, he put his hand
Under my shirt
And I asked him not to stop
For eight long months?

How do I lie so convincingly
When I still remember so well
Before, before
How i would tell anyone who would listen:

"I fell in love the first day
I met him,
And did not stop for
The next year and a half."

How can I tell anyone,
How would they--
Could they?
Believe me,
When they know?

When they know I have such deep
Intuition for what I want,
That I dig my claws in by
Minute one,
And don't let go until

They beg.