Tattered and bruised, feeling used.
Let the dust settle, and wonder where I am, where you last left me. Kept me in the dark long enough for me to understand that I don't need the light. The dust has sealed tight upon my skin.

Yet again, I feel the doubt filling in my pigments.
Are you different?
Forgiveness is something I've longed for, what right do I have to strip it from you.
Am I different?
How many times must I forgive you?
Am I truly deserving of that forgiveness as you are? Are we the same?

you deserve nothing but the world
you deserve to be in a place
where the only thing you feel is
love
happiness
and support
you deserve to have people in you life
who make you feel like
everything will be okay
you deserve to feel like you can be
the most genuine version of yourself
and not give a ****
about what anyone else thinks

]i built a wall
]to block your love
]because i’m not
]deserving of.

My memories with you...
I buried it thousands of feet, yet
I still remember everything.
But it's okay I will soon get over of it.
I will soon forget about you.
If the both of you deserves each other, then
I too deserve so much more.

is there any such thing
as too much ink
too many pens
more paper
than the human heart can fill?

the heart does nothing
but pump the blood that is necessary
to fill my fingers
to move
to scrawl too much ink
with too many pens
on more paper
than such a treacherous ***** deserves.

but the heart will get its ink
if it has to bleed dry in order to fill
the pens that it thinks it should have
to defile more paper
than any forest should have to give.

the heart will have what it wants
forests
nibs
and veins
be ******

you wield your sword
and ground your shield
when i come near,
my love scares you
doesn’t it?

z.f.

I loved you,
And I meant it.
You said it,
And you didn't.
How was your heart so cold
Yet you made me feel so warm.
I didn't even care about you first,
You said I was "attached"
But you are just vain,
We played this game all night
In creature of swallows night.
You made me feel beautiful and full of life,
But then there were times you made me cry.
I just wanted to be friends,
But you ruined that too,
Now we don't speak,
And I didn't even cry.
And I want you to know now
If you ever want to come back or if you start dying
I would not care,
You would feel as I did.
You mean nothing to me now.