If I haven’t told you enough times today,  
I love you. And I am infinitely proud of you. Even on your hard days, you handle it with grace.

my days are numbered by battles
and i sleep and dream peacefully
valkyrie my love

days go
by
like cars
go by
like days
go
by like
cars go
by
like days
go by
like
cars go
by in fashion
in form in
unison in
seconds

awake to repeat
on time
today as skeletons
flame contagion
bright against
your ripe apple

again arranging
your pattern to
fit   /   feed
the mouth sloppy
below bit-beady
black holes

Bad days are just good days that started off with false promises of euphoria
Maybe you got an A on the test you didn’t study for
Or they served those spicy chicken nuggets you like
Maybe the sunset was pretty

And then maybe you realize a day with good doesn’t guarantee a good day
suddenly its 3 am and tears stream down your face
You’re wishing it could just be over
And you listen to something that makes your heart drip black ink
Wishing you were lucky enough to call it only a nightmare
And you bang your head against the cold linoleum bathroom floor as you lie wishing you could just sink

we may be afraid now but with time comes courage
after you’ve stared at wounds soaked in alcohol and
covered with minions band aids;
at your horrified face in the mirror after cutting your bangs too short
after you’ve starched your hair with every chemical under God’s sun;
And dyed it manic panic cotton candy pink
After the spray tan that stained your skin a color that no natural human body has ever displayed
After you run out of unhealthy ways of coping

You’re left
Wishing you could go back to a time of fifty cent over sweetened iced tea
California sun searing into your skin
Pastel green Baskin Robbins ice cream melting between your fingertips
Summers you spent yearning for autumns
now becoming winters spent yearning for spring
you’re dissatisfied no matter what season
But trust me when I say that
You are going to have bad days and
sometimes good days where
it’s hard to see the good
Trust me when I say you still have plenty of time and many new roads lie ahead

Less I am a fisherman
with patient gaze on
undulating seas

and more bait
submerged
heart on the hook
waiting
for you,
beloved,
to cast away this
eternity