Too good and yet true
Too beautiful
To taste
Without falling in daze
Without following
Delirious
An aroma trail of craving
On the back of my tongue
I’m getting equal measures
Of heaven and hell
Perfectly balanced

My eyes are my traitors
Plotting to open the gates
Sending stowaway warriors
Whom I never gave orders
To slip behind walls
Of thickest black pupils
In the Trojan horse
That my eager look is

And gazes are bridges
Unwillingly
Supporting the siege
Of epiphanies
You and me
Caught in our ambush
Completely surrounded by Us

Sleek dark hair
Highlights of auburn, color of fall
Stern lips
A look of austerity in the dark russet eye
Skin lighter than my own
The smaller wrist
Large eyes
Faint deepening crow's feet
Nursing knowledge
Small, short, slight, petite, and strong
Maternal vanguard
Matriarchal
Beautiful and earthly
Scorpionic elusiveness
Her unused canvas
Frequent Homegoods purchased
Shifts decor in the livingroom like a Feng Shui practitioner
Laughs at the absurdity of modern horror movies
Smells like bath wash and too much perfume
Smells of my childhood
Smells of my innocence
Paperbacks of Hugo and Austen in boxes in the basement
Paperbacks of The Symposium and a biography of Marx in the basement
Secretly likes to cook
Culinary explorer
Gastronomically open
Culinary door opener
Very little circle of friends
Outspoken
Austerity on the small mouth
Austerity in the small mouth
Conviction in her voice
Soft graphite in her voice
Has a lisp sometimes
The slight overbite(?)
Immigrant parent
Unnaturalized citizen
Reminds me of fall
Reminds me of everything
Reminds me of very little at once
Life-teacher, one of many
Protective
Over-protective
Pushy
The way her hand moves on her tablet
The way her voice sounded during a lecture when I was a child
The way she used to hug
Closet full of shoes and clothes she rummages through when she's going out
Meticulous cleaner
The way her voice sounded when she tried to make sense of me
The way her voice sounds
...

take away the razor blade
and bury it with your old
self

take the blue hair
and drench it in
black

laugh
free, finally
free from your old prison

of skin, i am here
and you have nothing to
fear

if there isn't a chance of heaven
you claw your way up to the pearly gates
and you'll slap the saints and tell them

i never believed, and then
they'll let you in
they always let you in in the end

sing your songs
dance wherever you need to dance to feel
anything

with me, we will no longer be numb,
tongues dry, mouths dumb
in wonder at this amazing world

one day, you will be happy,
not in the body you were born with
but the body you created for yourself

i care
i care
*i care

how are you happy
after hurting someone who
you were so close too

We were gazing within each others
                                         eyes, souls.
Gathering within each others unspoken
                                        words, syllables.
Echoing in tranquillity, the loss of never
                                         touching, holding.
But you were like a far off star in my sight
                                         unreachable, seen.
Though closer than before we could never
                                         cherish, elope.
Alone with in the grasp of another we were
                     so close but never enough....