I'm watching you as you watch me
It's breaking my heart to see you cry constantly.
WE have had memories that no one can take away
Even if I left right now, I want you to be ok.

These white walls are screaming and the nurses don't even care.
Feeling so lucky just to have you here.
The drip of the medicine slowly killing me
I only pray for it to be quick, if it is to be.

Life is short like a piece of sand on this beach.
Relationships and building character is what we should seek.
In one hundred years of advancement, we've taken ten steps back.
Perfect love and kindness is what we often lack.

We act so much better than the animals we cage.
Then wonder why mother nature is pouring out her rage.
The earth was freely given with more than enough to supply
When I think of the greed and selfishness, it makes me want to cry.

We are all so worried about what happened in the past.
If we don't start living in the present, our race will not last.
Instant gratification and materialism and power for a false sense of pride.
Are we ever going to adapt and evolve and stop the constant lies.

Friendships that last are hard to find
It takes a lifetime to truly appreciate the genuine kind.
We've been given a brain we are too lazy to use
It's like we're playing a game, in order to win, we have to lose.

My breath is now rattling out of my chest
Maybe now, my soul will finally be at rest.
When I stand at the gates of judgement, I'll smile.
Cuz life only lasts a second, but eternity is a very  long while.

Advice from beyond the grave and back
Love everyone, even those who hurt you, even if they don't love you back.
For the real test of character and spirit within you
Is forgiveness, kindness and always being true.

Meditate, reflect and do your best at everything
Time runs out so fact, you don't even notice it.
So stay the course and on the right path, whatever you do
Never say never, don't give up and be one of the chosen few.

Belle

belle laid beside me, exhausted we both were after she finished riding me
she took a drag of the menthol again, she always did.
"You can't keep ******* and going like this"
You really want me to, flaws that you know and abhor to commit?"
"yes, you may not be perfect but you treat me with respect, which is more than what everybody else taught me to expect."
"But just yesterday you snapped at me for botching something nice."
“Yeah i Jump down your throat a lot, so to your ego apply cold ice"

Belle is a nice lady, but she’s got a very messed up past
she’s been cheated on, broken hearted, and been dropped on her ***
but she’s got a good soul, but her sense of affection’s gone cold
but you can still se that desire for happiness in her eyes

i guess you could say i won the nobelle prize?
She left last night, said i couldn’t be assed to commit,
so she took her stuff and split.
****… i guess belle is gone,
well, she jumped downn my throat a lot, so maybe there’s a blessing in the storm

Atop the frail ego she mounts her merciless machine gun with which she mows down any speckle of personality that dares flicker amongst her immediate surroundings, until only her presence alone can remain untarnished and unfettered by sadistic, sardonically summarized ridicule, luminous and majestically radiating with solitary supremacy. Oh, the splendorous grandeur of self-indicted superiority, the rush of power and authority from diminishing another's essence with ruthless categorical association, the incomparable ecstasy of using their own positive attributes as their rudimentary flaws. Viscerally volatile, the cocking of the mocking gun's hammer is to be recognized as the phrase "You're just trying to be__". This is critical, for all too well she knows to a certainty that at the most essential level, one is only simply trying to be. And when you attack a person's will to try, their will to be, then you are taking aim at the one vital aspect of their existence which they hold any discernible dominion over: their character. The slaying is heinous and orgasmically fulfilling, for how can the perennial, separatist worship of Self be indulged in among so many of these "others"? But oh how exhausting it must be, the perpetually cyclic nature of the task. How can she ***** a light that doesn't exude from a distant source, but is a brother beam of the source they share? How does she extinguish the reflection of a flame off the water? Like fireflies on summer nights they disappear only to reappear again, somewhere else, reminding her of the irrevocable, irreducible power of being born and reborn again in the new moment. The self-aware *******, audacious enough to love themselves. How much of it do they really think they can withstand?
Reload.

yeah
you might describe me as
"annoying"
"obsessive"
"weird"
"in her own world"
but
it's only because
fictional people mean more to me
then you do
and yeah
that might be sad
but to me
it's my whole world
what happens on the screen of a tv
affects me more then
what happens in my school
and watching my favorite character die
hurts so much
and i'm so tired of being categorized
as just another fan-girl
because i feel like so much than that

I am an idea thought up.
I am an idea forgotten.
I was a thought heard.
I am a thought  forgotten.
I am what you could’ve been.
I am the song of your heart.
I am a song unheard.
I am erased and forgotten.

The method of my stance has not
come with such easy majesty.
My friends can see when I lean.

The boundary between my life spirit
and those living outside
my boundary have merged
discreetly more than once.

My underneath scrapes
the surface of muddy ponds
while my latest haircut
invites a sky of golden drizzle.

I might enjoy calling
this day over, as in done with,
were it not that the stars
swinging over my ears
await their glistening.