Mountains of pillows,
Soft sheets,
and warm covers,
couldn't bring you into my arms.

Wrinkles and sunken silhouettes,
remind me of what we once had.
Now you only **** me
when the calories and lust hit your gut.

I hate sleeping alone,
you won't help me resolve the issues
that block my way to you.
What we once had.

Washing machines drain the fabric of you
in every cycle
One more day my body forget the tenderness of you
and your loving arms.

Family, friends
They’re all  the same
People we know,
We trust
And we love
They love us too, yes
But in the end,
A person is always alone
No company, Nothing
Just alone
And then, only then
We have time for ourselves
Some precious moments
When we figure out ourselves
Who we are
What we are
We just need
Some time to think
Some alone time

I feel forgotten,
I feel lost,
I feel the rotten,
Burning cost
I had to pay
When I lost faith
In the rock
That held me still.
Blade pierced my bones,
My foe reproached
Dailily unto me
“Where is thy god?
Why cast ye down?
What of disquiet in the?”
Atop the sands
Lean on my hands
And begin my ascent to the surface.
“A valid question,
My soul, my friend.
I suppose I lost my purpose.”

There was a time  
when putting voice to
silent declarations  
unspoken longing  
you would have uttered my name  

And it would have danced  
along your strings

The inept waves of loneliness felt
are but a sign we are human;

Weaving shattered pieces of misery together
in hopes of being perceived
as complete again;

Apprehension clouding the mortal ideas
we call emotions.

Alone in shadows,
no friends in sight.
The world feels distant,
cold and unkind.
No laughter shared,
no voices near,
Just quiet echoes
I barely hear.
Faces pass,
but none look back,
I’m lost in shades of
endless black.
No hands to hold,
no joy to share,
Just empty spaces,
cold as air.

I am in plain sight:
A parrot on a pink tree,
But no one is around.

I am in plain sight:
A fish on the beach,
Having fun with the sand.

I am in plain sight:
A leaf growing on an old bench
Feeling the steady wind moving my hand.

I am in plain sight:
A memory.
A song.
A lullaby.

I am in plain sight - hiding,
Waiting to be found.

I remember it all, actually.
More than I'd like to have.
I remember waking up to
The scent of breakfast
I’d soon find was made for one.

I remember walking down
The stairs to lock eyes with you
As you were opening the door.
I remember the feeling
Of dread that crushed me
Under its weight as
I understood your gaze.
I don’t remember being sick.

Even though you were gone,
I remember the dark shade of
Canary that reflected from
The plate in front of me and
Tinted our home.
I don’t remember the lights being broken.

I remember hearing your voice
Call me from our room.
I remember the sharp ringing that
Endlessly reflected off the
Carpet walls of our home
Despite the silence.
I don’t remember picking up the fork.

I remember when
My senses returned to me.
When I was cured.
When the lights were fixed.
When I put the fork down.
I remember the
World refusing to warp any longer.
I remember the scent of
A breakfast made for one.
Your final gesture of kindness.
I don’t remember deserving it.

I remember sitting.
I remember eating.
I remember the
Overwhelming taste of guilt,
The taste of wetness,
The taste of salt.
I remember the taste of
French toast.
Though,
I don’t remember crying.