i feel the water as it streams onto my hands
the faucet showing me my reflection in it's silver curved structure
i close my eyes
i have become unaccustomed to looking at myself
the sight of me has become unbearable now

thoughts stream into my brain
filling me with dread and anguish
my breath rapidly increasing just from thoughts alone

i turn the water temperature to the left
i feel the heat begin to rise
my flesh begins to burn
it pleads to be taken out of the lava but i leave it
all i can focus on is the heat, and it is bliss

i grew up believing scars were ugly
and self-inflicted ones even uglier
i never had a way to make the pain go away
until now, with a method that leaves no marks

the temperature is all the way up
my problems, gone
my fears, gone
my tears, gone
my hatred, gone
my longing for everything i will never be, gone

i turn the faucet off
all that's left is the pure redness in my hands that will go away in the next hour until once more i need to relieve myself from, well, myself

I'm beside you in your mind and I'm with you in your heart,
Don't be afraid because pain is merely an art
To which we can dance and let the bad times remind
That the good days shall come with no need for a rewind.

Within us, is a                                                          voice
that no one ever heard off.
A sound wanted to go                                          out
Yet its forbidden
and not allowed


For we are always ask                                         don't
Don't speak your mind.
It's what they always say
now you're silent
and you cant                                                                 be
someone you are destined to become

Still we continued to be silent
For we are                                                                     afraid,
Scared of what it can do
that's what on our mind

The little voice inside us
only wanted to be heard
Now we want  it to                                                       drown
into the abyss of nothingness
and stay in that void
for we are afraid of what others think.


Not knowing  its potential
it stayed there
stuck with all the other                                                    noises
Noises that always rendered
and deemed it as useless
Those noises kept you chained                                   with
the guilt of voicing it out.
Dragging you further down.


Creativity and all of                                                  your
wonderful imaginations
cant come out for its locked up
for you are                                                                   SILENT
and always afraid of what others think,
always waits for the approval of others.

Now you kept it all in
You will never learn to fly
because you wrapped your                                              VOICE
with fear and guilt.

Oh, how easy it would be?
With these evil thoughts
That just seem to overtake.
I know they are lies
Just trying to eat me from the inside
And just trying make me cry.
But, oh, how they make me always think
How easy it would be.

I try
To cry
Out for help

I yelp.
I yell.
I scream.
I try to tell.

But no one hears
Or seems to care
They don’t listen
They don’t see
My eyes no longer glisten
And that I no longer feel glee

I feel worse with each weary day,
I'm tired and growing afraid,
It's hard to believe you loved me,
If you loved me you would have stayed.

I can't let go of what we had,
You've always been my better half,
And now all that I have left of you,
Is your old shirt and a photograph.

No matter how many months go by,
I'm tormented by the lingering ache,
I see you every time I close my eyes,
At night the memories keep me awake.

I put on music and turn it up loud,
To distract myself, to no avail,
Every song reminds me of you,
And the way your chest falls when you exhale.

Maybe I am acting crazy,
I'm thinking with my heart and not my brain,
But that's because talking to you,
Is the only thing that keeps me sane.

I don't know why I'm still holding on,
When it's clear you want to be free,
I'm wasting my time, you're happy now,
You obviously don't need me.

Three angels came to greet me,
They said they seek for a friend to be,
First is the Angel of Death,
whom I befriended with,
Now my soul would be reaped with care,
Second is the Angel of Sorrow,
whom I befriended with,
To accompany me on a blue day,
Third is the Angel of Love,
whom I befriended with not,
For love only hurt,So I wouldn't dare.