As scared as I was,
I remember climbing my first mountain.
Then there was a second
That wasn't as demanding.
The third one was a task
Because it was much too rocky to be easy,
And the fourth one was intimidating
As much as it was frightening.
The fifth one was intriguing
And the six was the most humbling
Experience up until then.
The seventh, I thought, would be my last one
But alas,
I'm climbing an eighth mountain.

I fell in love
Climbing up the first one,
I took a chance
Climbing up the second.
I knew it wouldn't be easy
But I took a chance with the third,
And I wanted to go higher
And higher after the fourth.
I wanted something different
From the fifth,
And I very much enjoyed
The smooth scaling of the sixth.
I was too careless
Thinking I had enough experience for the seventh,
But I learned my lesson,
And not taking it easy on this next trip

I’m a world traveler
In search of another
In a planet this cloudy
But there not another
Like you;
I heard of a woman
That was her own island
And when I sailed out there
Her waters were crystal
Clear blue.
I swam across oceans
And I climbed over mountains,
I flew with the birds
And into a cave’s darkness
All in search for the truth.
They say that a diamond’s a diamond
And they equal in value
But I had never seen one
Quite as polished
As you.

I love poetry.
I can read it as a whisper
I can shout it when the wind blows
And I can shelter myself
From the opinion of other people;
I love poetry.

I can talk about the whispers
That I would bring to some delicate ears
Or shout to my own people
Who'd rather just talk it through.

I love poetry,
I can write a song
I can sing a song
And I can free my spirit
From the needs of other people and my own;
I love poetry.

I've been in love
Ever since I was fifteen,
Ever since I wrote her name,
Ever since I grabbed a pen,
A piece of paper,
And said what I needed to say in poetry.
I've been in love
Ever since I was 18
Ever since I wrote a song,
Ever since I picked up the guitar,
And told her
Exactly what I wanted to say in poetry.

I've been in love with poetry
For so long,
Because regardless of the break ups
Or the false hopes of other loves,
Poetry is always there,
Waiting for you to pick the pen up.

I wonder,
Just like always,
If you remember the hotel pool side,
The dark night
In which you invited me out there,
For us to talk.

I wonder,
If I said too much,
I think that I must have
Because I was tense and nervous inside,
I said it frantically
Because I wanted
To remember that I night.

I did too much
To try and be romantic,
Because I thought that you were that type,
That you would like for me to hold you in my arms,
Look into your eyes,
And say I love you
Under a fool's moon that night.

I think it's easier
To write with a broken heart.
I think it's easier
To write out of anger.
It seems like I
No longer have anything to write,
I am no longer angry
And I have a whole heart.

Sometimes I want to write.

i have been tucked
away
in the words
"i love you,"
hidden
in the corners and
curves of the
three.

I must cry
Because
No one will do it for me.
Because when I shed these tears
I am reminded
Of how insignificant
The problem is -
I will cry
Because,
Even though the answer is simple,
I will not see it
Unless I see it with these blurry eyes.
Only then will I listen,
Only then will I open my heart
And say "that was the reason."
I must cry,
Because
No one must shed these tears
But me.

The best poems are the honest poems, not because they’re good (necessarily), but because of the relief as you read them. There is nothing to hide in the in-betweens of poetry because everything you say is carried on by the words that are in it, there is nothing you couldn't say because they were written within the boundaries of writing (and no one ever wanted to read it anyway). Except somebody will read them, and they will want to know more details so they will kept reading once you’re done writing, and they will fix themselves pretending they weren't reading and then re-reading because it would be crazy to be writing about them reading a poem. And those are the best poems because this is that poem.

The winter night
Has taken over my body
From the tip of my fingers
All the way to the rough of my heels.
I am numb from the face
And my shiver is strange,
My jaw will not sit still.

An artist
A guitarist
A pianist
A mechanic
A photographer
A writer
A cook
A model
A director
A producer
A mathematician
A football fanatic

I want to do this
And anything else that'll make a woman happy.

i dont smoke
nor do i support it
but when i do it
i happen to watch it
escaping
because i know
in that moment
that my breath
is working just perfect.

i don't know
what is wrong
with knowing
where you want to go,
where you want to be
and who you want to be with.
why is it
that every time i give too much
i get nothing back,
and when i dont give anything
things seem to fall in my lap?
maybe my short coming
is that i want to love a good woman
and i want to be a good man
but i haven't learned the one lesson
that will help me find the way
to her.
i spend too much thinking
about how its going to be
and i forget to live for me,
at least for a little,
just for me.
but that is also a problem,
for when a good woman loves me
i don't know where to go,
i don't know what to do,
or how to learn to love her.
i like her company
but im not ready, and panic,
and end up hurting her.
how do i make up for it?
i give everything
to the one with a shortcoming
and the whole thing starts over.
and then i start
all over again,
i want a good woman,
but im not a good man,
i am not ready
and i know she's not ready
because we've all got
shortcomings.

You are off limits
No need for reminders,
But it doesn't matter
Because you were once with me.

I don't get angry
I don't get jealous
It doesn't bother me
It doesn't harm me any -
I am not stressed

I had you all to myself,
Many nights you slept with me.
I kissed your body,
Your face, your lips,
I kissed your soul,
And from head to toe
You were for me.

I made love to you
Before he did,
Before him,
I made you go crazy,
Before him
You trembled in fear,
And that first time
I was your teacher -
I helped you to feel,
That is why now
You can go on
Show off a little
Of what you learned
From being with me.

i understand
that the pain
that comes
from a heartbreak
can be devasta-
ting
like the sting
of a wasp
at every little vain.
it is poison to the soul
and your heart
is pounding strong
trying to fight
the devil's work.
in your head
in your thoughts
you try to analyze
what went wrong:
was it you?
was it her?
is there anyone to blame
or was it just God
and one of his jokes?
i don't mean to say
that we are entertainment
for the Lord,
i'm just thinking
how i'll see it
when im old
and think of how foolish
it was to think
that the older i got
the easier it would be.

what is love?

its been a couple of days.
i have been sitting here
but haven't been all there.
i am not here
as you are not either
i am not here
as you haven't either.

i won't wait
i will not be there
i will be somewhere
where I've never been
i will be with her,
the one's that's been waiting
for me not to be here either.

there are things i want to hide
things that im afraid of,
things i wouldn't tell anyone
but there is one thing that i wish
i didnt Have to hide.
That is that I love you.
That I want you,
Every day more and more
I want to know that I'm the one
That gets to caress you,
Kiss you, and have you
Wrapped around my arms.
I'm ashamed of many things
But not you,
You are the last thing
I could ever be ashamed of
Specially because
I still remember you.



I remember you.

inspire me to write
inspire me to dream
i want to feel
that feeling again,
when i hold you
when i kiss you,
on the lips again.
dont turn your back,
dont turn against me,
i want to know that you're there
when im going down under.
i miss you
and you miss me
i know because i know you
just as much as you know me
so dont turn your back,
dont turn against me
i want to see you tonight
and make you whisper my name
when i get close to you
and put you against me.

I guess I'm gonna go to bed tonight
and blind myself again like every night,
To lie and say I don't mind
To be a slave of Time.
Yeah, I'll rest up and sleep tonight
to silence this mellow weeping heart
Saying I only wish to hold you
This, and every night.

Because you know well
What it is that we want
We want to have each other in our arms,
But we fight so desperately to do things right
That we give way to cursed Time.

I guess I'm gonna go to bed tonight
Not to linger with this in mind,
To rest assured in what is right
and not listen to what we want.
Yeah, I'll rest up and sleep tonight
To silence this mellow weeping heart
Saying I only wish to hold you,
Wish I'd cuddle, kiss, and hug you -
But I reply with "Not tonight."

You know well
What it is that what we want.
We want to have each other in our arms,
But we fight so desperately to do things right
and give in to this curse of Time.

I don't sleep well enough sometimes.

I think about all of the things that I'm doing wrong in my life.
And how there aren't many rights.
I'm not a leader, I'm not a follower. I have no influence, no one has influence
on me.
And I think,
how could I make things better? But I can't.

Because it's like quicksand. The more you desperately seek an escape,
the faster you sink in. And I just sit here

Waiting until I can no longer breath.

I cant begin to describe
How helpless I feel right now.
I know that I can move on
Because I have done it before,
But I always ask myself
Why I should.

I know you don't love me,
In the way that I did,
But then again
I don't love you either
As I don't even remember your face.

And yet,
I want you to be the one
To carry my heart,
Because I rather you have it
Then have it lingering around.

I guess what makes me
Most upset after all
Isn't the fact that you left me
Or left my heart broken in two
It's the fact that you left me...

You left me alone.

I have always thought of myself
As an ugly duckling.
I keep hoping that someday
Ill be the man you are going to want
And I keep my fingers crossed
So that I really am that man.

But while I’m black,
And repulsive to all the other swans
I’m going to learn the trades of life
And I’m going to make sure
That when I meet you,
Which I will,
That you never suffer, or struggle,
To be the most amazing wife.

Why? I do ask myself
The same question all the time.
Why waste my time on something
That has a high chance
Of never happening
According to my previous record
Of tall tales and beautiful lies.

The answer is quite simple
And I know if I told someone
They would probably laugh, but

The truth is I can’t think of anything else
But our future house
Our future kids
And our dog running around.
I have my Lincoln and Beamer
Out in the driveway, and whatever
You are gonna want to drive,
(I’m not quite sure what kind of chick
You’re gonna be)
And we have a lawn and garden
That I will cut from time to time,
A pool out in the back,
And the neighbors always coming over
For some coffee and a laugh.

And I know
I’m in too big of a hurry to grow up,
And I know
I’m supposed to enjoy being young,
But all that matters to me,
All I want to accomplish,
And the biggest dream of mine
Is to grow old with you,
Whoever it is that you are,
And to see my kids grow up.

All I can do for now
Is be the man I want to be
For the wife I’ve been waiting on
For years.
I’m going to get a good paying job
And drive the car
That’s gonna catch your eye,
I’m gonna play the guitar
And learn how to sing,
So I can say how beautiful you are
To me
And most importantly I’m gonna learn
How to treat a woman right,
Because after all,
You are MY woman, and I your man.

It's me again.
I imagine this being a letter
That a Navy man writes to his woman
Six months after being over seas.
I can't imagine the joy that it will be
When you open this and kiss the letter as you're done reading it
(In this case it would probably be a screen)
      But no matter how you get this
Or how you think of how it should be
I want you to know that you mean a lot to me.
I know that you matter,
And you should know that you matter,
Because it's not everyday that I put things down on ink.
I've been thinking about you,
And the future me.
That One that gets to be together with you
In a future not too far from here (I hope).
I've seen some things, and
Experienced some things,
And it may be just a now-kind-of-thing
But I haven't experienced anything like you.
You have goals and ambitions
And you won't admit it
But you see your future
And how bright lit it is.
I just hope that it's me that you see
Standing next to you,
And you beside me,
Because it is you for me
When I squint my eyes and look at my blueprint.
The truth is that I don't know that you know
That I like to think about you
And all the wonderful things we could do,
Or all the wonderful things we could be.
In my mind I like to think
That you will be there for me,
And I can be there for you for whenever you need me.
There's not a whole lot that I can offer you
But I can assure you
That I'm working on being that someone for you.
There's only so much
I can work on at once
And only so much I want to accomplish
But I know that someday
I'll be able to adorn you
With all of the things you could ever want from me-
From letters,
To poetry,
To songs,
To jewelry,
To books,
To cars,
To houses,
To lipsticks,
And all of the things
A beautiful woman like you would ever want to see.
But who am I to promise a forever
When we can't even handle the now.
I feel so far away,
But still -
It's nice to think about.

How long has it been?
It's been about five
Years since that thing
That you and I had

The parties the laughter
And the fun that we had
The singing and clapping
To our favorite band

It all turned to dark
When you said goodbye -
The Color of Roses
Now turn into black

What did you say
When I saw you last?
Hope you find that someone
With who it'll last

All my affection
Just wasn't enough
You ran to someone
Who isn't even your type

Maybe, just maybe
I thought you'd come back
But I guess it was you
That got the last laugh

Black and white
You left me to die
The girl of my dreams
The only girl in my life
The one that made it worth
Living this life

problematic is the renewal of my soul,
systematic is my need to be evolved.
quite listless are the streaming roads
leading to the ends of this weary world.

now breeding are conjectures in my skull,
still breathing is my life - soothing cold,
with this possession in dispossession
tearing up my vile flesh and decrepit bones.

soon forgetting to be adorned
laughs will soon start to be heard,
once the fluent waters of the flood
swallow up the darkness it's become.

give me reason, i undergo deep sleep
live forever and give side to my good and dear

soul.

How do I say
What can't be said
Or feel
What can't be felt?
To which you say:
"Well, how DO you feel?"

I don't know that this is real.
The fact that I have, or had,
All I could have wanted,
and yet,
I feel
Like I had nothing.

Nothing ever happened,
I never had anybody.
I asked nobody to lunch,
And gave my heart
To nobody.
Yeah that sounds about right-
No one or no body.

I had no one at my apartment,
Under the sheets
Was not a body,
Not a soul,
Not a woman,
Not nobody
Shared a pillow and a blanket.

So...
"How do I feel?"
I ask my self
And everybody,
Because if nothing happened,
With any body,
It only means that in this story
I was nobody.

It's raining out today.
It's a hot cocoa-
Wrapped in a blanket-
Wearing white socks-
Kind of day.

Yeah, it's that kind of day.

It's raining out today.
It's a warmth on my palm-
Warmth to my chest-
Warmth to my toes-
Kind of day.

(There's a tap near my window,
There's a roar out my door,
There's a light in the sky, and yet,
I feel alone.)

And yeah it's that kind of day.

I  take a step out the door
I sit out in the cold
I take a breath of fresh air
With socks gone all went
I look up at the dark ---
    And I wait.

Yeah, it's that kind of day.

That day I slept I went to sleep
With dreams so sweet and heavenly;
So kind was the day and quite remarkably
Had me find a friend of mine in jubilee.
She made my day so suddenly
Into the ripest fruits of loving spring,
And now they agree that within this sea
All turbulence has come to cease.

The boat that floats floats beautifully
With her in command of this sailing ship;
Everything that had been torn apart into debris
Now leaves no trace of lonely weep.
Now we're off to a place that waits for me,
To bring along what life has given me:
A friend to cherish, a golden sun is she,
That turns the sturdy heads of the marquis.

Do you believe
The reason why
You hurt so much
Is because your
World is just?
That because we care so much is
That we lose ourselves
And train of thought,
And don’t follow the way
We must?
Or how do you describe
These fallacies,
These rules that come
As prophecies?
By trying to catch
Fleeting fantasies?
No!
Open your eyes
And see for yourself
That all of this
Is vanity!
How dare you speak of love
When those feelings
Have made you lose sanity!
Those are not
Obtainable conjectures;
I’m sorry but it isn’t love
You need lecture in.
Love is perfect and you are not,
How can you condemn
What you have not?
It is not meant to please you
Or relieve you
From the solitude
That seeks you!
It is only to be found
Once you’ve known
How to hurt
And to enjoy
The pleasure of being
With her
Or without her!
You must first learn
That people will treat you
Wrong
And displease you,
But understand one thing,
And one thing only,
Love will find you
Once you’re ready
And you will never,
Ever,
Be lonely.

It's funny,
I haven't even met your mother,
And I already think of you.
I think of the times we'll spend together
And the times we'll play together.
I already know what I'm gonna get you
On your first birthday
And what you'll be wearing on your second.

Honestly though,
I don't know how, when, or with who I'm gonna get there,
I just know that one day you'll be there
And I'll be here waiting
For the day in which I will hold you
And your little hands will move from here to there -
So wait for me,
I will get there.

I'm picking things up along the way
That I wanna teach you when I can.
I hope that you're not overwhelmed
When you try to hold your football,
Soccer ball or baseball.
(Volleyball is a lot of fun too!)
We'll play catch, and we will run,
I will catch you, and you'll have fun - I promise.

I hope you forgive me though,
As I don't know your mom.
I don't know if I have or haven't
Already set our course.
But you know what,
I bet she's beautiful
And the most caring person in the world.
I want to make sure she takes care of you,
After all.

It's hard to think of you,
As I hope I can make it through to you,
And tell you that all I'm doing today is because of you.
I want you to learn how run, how to play sports, how to jump,
And I want to be there to help you when you fall.
I want to teach you how to play guitar
And some magic tricks with cards,
I want to teach you to write some poetry
And play some music to make songs.

I want to make you proud,
As I hope you'll make me proud.
Even if you don't want to learn any of these things,
Or follow in my footsteps in any way
I want you to know that I've thought of you
Ever since today,
And that I can't wait to meet you,
Or your mother,
On the day in which you're born.

I wonder if you've noticed.

If you haven't
I would like to share with you
A little something:

I grew up with this idea
That someday I would grow up,
Have a girlfriend and get married.
I knew that I wanted children,
That I wanted a dog,
That we'd grow old in my house
And out in the driveway I'd have a Lambo
(I know, crazy, right?)
What I didn't know
Was how I was going to get there.
I didn't know that it wasn't that easy
And that, more than once,
I'd be hit with disappointment.
Not disappointed because I fell in love
And had my heart broken
(More than just a several amount of times)
But because I stepped out
Further and further from this utopia
I had set out for myself.

I learned, more than once,
That everyone had their own little story,
Everyone had their own little blueprint,
And not everyone was interested
In what I wanted.
I heard:
It's too early for you to think of those things,
Enjoy life and use all your energy on other things.
And I did.
I started drawing, started playing soccer,
I started writing poetry, and put music to my poems.
I started playing the guitar, I started singing,
I started to use my energy on "other things."
But the more I think about it
And the more I read about it
I was really just using those things
For my own story.

And that's the issue you should know about me
That's my so called "problem"
And the reason why you probably won't like me.
I lose sight of what's in front of me,
Chasing after what's ahead of me.
I forget the present and focus on the future,
And I fail to realize that you too
Have had to have
Some getting used to.
I don't know the secret
To a perfect relationship
Nor do I think I, as a person, am close to perfect.
And I know that you're not,
And I know you have your own faults and wants,
Your own needs,
And we're all a little selfish from time to time.

But here's the secret,
Here's the kicker,
The catch to my whole speech here:
I have tried to toss
All of my personal feelings aside,
I have tried to put my plans on hold
And fix myself onto the ground.
I've learned that that's how things often go
And it's not that I'm giving up on my plans
I just know that I want to be a part
Of your plans, and you of mine
Because I know that my plans
Could intertwine into your plans
And yours into mine
(That's what I hope anyway)
And if your plans and mine
All become one
Then I will have changed my blueprint,
And I will know the map.
I won't know the ending,
But I will know,
When I get there,
That I tried -
And for the first time,
In a long time,
I didn't give up.

It could be that someday is sooner than later
Or that somewhere is closer than farther
(I would hope so, and I want to believe so).
Because while I'm here and you're there
I know that our paths will somehow in someway connect.
It might not be tomorrow and it might not be tonight,
Perhaps in a week, in two weeks, or a month -
It might be a year till we cross each others tracks.
But whether or not we've already met,
(Whether or not that someday happens today
Or that somewhere is here and not there)
I will keep writing these letters to you
So that maybe one day you'll stumble upon them
And read of how much I was looking forward to
That someday, somewhere out there.

Last night,
I couldn't fall asleep.
I tossed and turned,
Took off my shirt,
Took of my shorts,
And the socks off my feet.
But still,
I couldn't fall asleep.

I got up,
Not to read a book or watch tv,
But to grab a pen,
To grab a pencil,
And finally,
A piece of paper.
I drew,
Because I couldn''t fall asleep.

I stopped.
My eyes grew tired
And the night grew weary.
But I looked at her
She looked at me.
She wanted color,
She needed color,
Before I fell asleep.

I wondered,
Because I couldn't help to wonder,
If this was born out of me,
From my mind,
From within me,
And IT,
Only being a piece of paper
Was so beautiful to me,
How much more Love
Does my Creator
Have for me?

I looked into her eyes,
They were much like my own.
And her need
Was much like my own.
I wanted to keep drawing
But I thought that maybe,
Just maybe,
My drawing, too, needed sleep.

I'm bad
(And I love it).
When you leave,
the next one walks in
(And I love it).
The danger,
the risk,
the adrenaline pumping through my veins.
I love it.
The heartbreak,
the sorrow,
I save myself from it.
I'm bad, and I know it,
But you pushed me to the limit
And now I'm broken.
I'm bad because of you
(And I love it).

You were there at the beginning,
You were THE beginning.
I didn’t know much of anything:
What to say, or how to say it.
I never held your hand because
    I was always too nervous,
Too nervous to even talk to you.

How pathetic.

You were my beginning, and you were my end.
I wonder what you’d think of me now.

Forgive me,
My silence is all that I have.
If we were speaking of money
My silence would be the change
For every dollar I've spent.
Forgive me,
For not having enough to spend.

If I had the money,
And my money could speak,
It would speak of your eyes
And the glance I can't buy.
If I had the money,
It would speak of your lips,
And I would be rich.

imagine life without the sky
imagine life without the stars

would it be the same for you and i?

if the sun didn't give off it's heat
it the moon didn't light up our nights

would we be here alone you and i?

when the sea no longer gave us wind
when the earth didn't tremble at our feet

would we be together you and i?

impossible feats are things like these
unreasonable thoughts that run with ease

never mind the selfish thought of you and i...

oh little boy get up from the ground
pick yourself up and dust yourself off

don't you worry about a thing
in this mess of a world
just get up and dance a little
its not that cold, after all