A decade ago the brightest minds dreamed
of being as close to the unknown as the clouds are.
Today we dream the same
but on a larger surface; the moon.

I never got to say goodbye,
never got to touch your hand—
so many times I tried— I try.

You evaded me, you were so sly,
clowning about with your band—
I never got to say goodbye.

My father called to tell me why,
his voice hollow, canned—
So many times I tried— I try.

That final day I began to cry—
my mother’s tears run on command—
I never got to say goodbye.

There was not one dry eye,
“Let go”— I hear a man demand—
So many times I tried— I try.

Even now, I wish to fly,
To say ‘this was not the plan’—
I never got to say goodbye,
So many times I tried— I try.

I can hear it
The whistle and rustle as air surrounds and fills the sacks of my lungs
I can feel it
The heavy tightness of my chest with every exhale
I reach in my pocket
"Shake" "shake"
"Puff" "puff"
A sudden relief of my lungs smooth muscles loosening
Dopamine fills my body
Sigh
I exhale and walk away happily daunting the next oncoming of an attack by its hazardous side effects

A fish out of water

Because there are no sides and
It doesn't matter what you believe
Or who you are
There is no left or right
We are all feel the same
Maybe a little broken
Or flawed or angry
It is a respite and relief from pain
It is spoken from the soul and to the soul
And it is the only time
That I can be fully human