I sit and wait
Wait for the leaves to turn golden
Wait for the snow to fall
Wait for the summer heat
Wait for the buzz of the bee
Wait for life to happen

I am a trained assassin
One you can't see
I bring forth happiness
So you can feel pain free

I am a trained assassin
One you shouldn't fear
I slay the monsters in the night
So you won't shed a tear

I am a trained assassin
One you know well
I love you dear, oh so much
It's for you, my heart swells

That's all I ever do.
Run from emotions
Run from people
Run from problems
Run from the unknown
Run from life.
It's time for me to stop running from all of these things.
They will never stop.
If they break me I will pick up the pieces and try again, until I win.
It's time for the tables to turn

You* saved me as I was slipping
From the dark embrace that came once again.
You gave me a reason
Not to see the scarlet lines.
You wiped away the secret tears
That were dripping down my face.

You saved me as I gave up,
Slowly not caring about anything.
You helped me see the light
When I was lost in the dark.
You asked if I was okay.
I said I was fine.
I finally didn't have to lie.

Thank *You

I want to feel that sweet kiss
   of the blade upon my wrist.

I want to hear that sweet whisper
   of my breath going hiss.

I want to see that sweet dance
   of the scarlet lines gone amiss.

I want to taste that sweet embrace
   of my guilt going tisk, tisk, tisk.

My lungs are squeezing,
My mind is wheezing,
The world is whirling,
My heart is throbbing.
Their eyes are watching.

The outside is a different picture:
My breathing seems normal.
My smile is strong,
And no one sees,
That I'm fine.

I just dont know anymore
The shaky breaths I take
With every step I make
The motivation lost
This emptiness inside me
Prevents me from smiling

I'm locked in
I'm panicking
I don't know what to do
I'm crying
I'm dying
I'm screaming out for you

The heart of the beast is pounding, pounding, pounding

Your legs are pumping, pumping, pumping

Its growl deep and head low

Watching you, its pray

Ready to pounce at any moment

But then, whoosh, it's gone

Into nothing, thin air, emptiness

You keep going because you're scared, unaware

The edge greets you

Instincts take over and you stop

The silence is deafening

Where did it go?

How are you alive?

It only took a moment to realize that the beast is inside

And in that moment, you deside

To fight the thing with yellow eyes

Aloud you say "Come out to play."

The sword is somehow there

You grab it and fight

For love, for life, for fear

The final blow is brought down

So is a crown

You slayed the beast that ruled your thoughts

Now it's your turn

Show them who's boss

This girl writes stories
Online, on paper, and on her skin,
She has secrets on her lips.
She claims to be made of tin.
Giving others tips on how to stay alive
They don't know she wants to die.

The minuets float by one by one
And I keep thinking
What have I done?

The blood rushes down to meet my fingers
The pain is gone,for now
But the thoughts still linger

I see you sitting there
Purple hair flowing the the wind
You see me nowhere
And its my heart I try to mend

Sometimes i hear voices in my head. They tell me I'm stupid, worthless, annoying. They whisper cruel things in the night. Filling my head with all of these awful thoughts.That I'm fat,ugly,unwanted. Most of the time it happens at the end of the day. When i go over the events of that day in my mind. You see these "voices" are just one voice. Mine.  I tell my self these things because sometimes i think they're true. I over think everything. Analyzing my every flaw. I do this when I'm alone. My mind is a dangerous place to be alone in and it scares me.

The Balance has been broken
Life is but a token
And Death is not unspoken