I don't know how much longer
I can pretend to be okay
Before my sunshine smile falters
And my heart becomes a bay

I love to laugh for others
But there's only so much I can do
Before I blow my cover
And my pain starts effecting you

I don't know how much longer
I can pretend to be okay
Before my regrets get stronger
And my guilt eats me away

I love to watch their eyes
As in them I see bliss
But still I choose the dark nights
Over the unknown ignorance

I don't know how much longer
I can pretend to be okay
Before one night turns somber
And I don't wake up that day

An empty glass sitting on the table

An empty matchbox with a burnt out candle

The empty paper for that forgotten essay

The empty cabinet, the cutlery's astray

That empty fridge, nothing to eat

That empty wallet, nothing is free

Your empty heart, no love to spare

Your empty eyes, your cold, dead stare

Broken life, your modus vivendi

Living is lonely, living is empty

I am here And so is pain
Walking with me on sorrows lane
Streetlights busted
With the memory of those no longer trusted

Potholes of misery
Echoing with the cries of good memories
"Shh darling I was there too"
I don't say the fact that nothing can save you

Sure you may be able to climb out of it
But on this road there's no point in irenic
I'll be alone until I die
" Not while I am by your side"

Oh right, my beautiful loving bride
My husband I'll be stuck with for the rest life
The thing that's been married to me since birth
Pain itself, a constant honeymoon of hurt

And yes, before you ask, pain has no gender
Congrats, everyone's thrown in the blender
Though I can't blame them, they give me company
I'm also not the one who decides if they leave

So as they drag me down this road and the road rash burns
I want to escape but we've taken too many turns
By now I'm far to lost in this maze
I'm forever trapped, counting the days

As the days turn to months and eventually years
And this labyrinth constantly changes so I don't know where's here
I stretch my hand to pains and they gladly take it with one cost
Poison seeps into my veins and I'm okay with being lost

Now close your eyes
And open them at sunrise
Grab the string to the blinds
Think of how you miss the sunlight

While you stretch your arms with a great yawn
And watch butterflies lay on the rose in the lawn
You ponder on what you will dream
Then wonder what else hides in the green

Smell the dew upon the grass
Your mug of coffee, done at last
To feel its warmth upon your fingers
And hope that maybe it will linger

Water the tiny kiwi tree
Study each and every leaf
To wonder how large it may grow
And hope in sixty years you'll know

To wonder where the sun goes
And if the butterflies eat the rose
To ponder if you'll sleep in turn
If you read this in reverse

𝘐 𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘬 𝘢𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘶𝘱𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘦𝘨
𝘗𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘭𝘦, 𝘣𝘭𝘶𝘦, 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘥𝘰𝘵𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘳𝘦𝘥
𝘞𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘥 𝘐 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘧𝘳𝘰𝘮, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦
𝘈 𝘴𝘶𝘥𝘥𝘦𝘯 𝘪𝘮𝘱𝘢𝘤𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘪𝘵 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘴

𝘉𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘰 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘦𝘴 𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘯 𝘥𝘰?
𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘰 𝘪𝘴 𝘫𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘳𝘦𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘺𝘰𝘶
“𝘏𝘦𝘺 𝘥𝘰𝘯’𝘵 𝘵𝘰𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘦, 𝘪𝘵’𝘴 𝘪𝘯 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯”
𝘌𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘵𝘩𝘰𝘶𝘨𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘭𝘭 𝘨𝘰 𝘢𝘸𝘢𝘺

𝘚𝘰 𝘸𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘸𝘳𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵
𝘐𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘵𝘢𝘪𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘮𝘺 𝘷𝘦𝘪𝘯𝘴, 𝘮𝘺 𝘧𝘭𝘦𝘴𝘩 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘱𝘢𝘳𝘵
𝘐 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘱𝘢𝘪𝘯 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘮𝘺 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘵
𝘞𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘦𝘢𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘪𝘯𝘶𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘱𝘢𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘪𝘵 𝘴𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘥𝘴

𝘔𝘺 𝘭𝘶𝘯𝘨𝘴 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘭 𝘴𝘰 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘥, 𝘩𝘰𝘸 𝘥𝘰 𝘐 𝘣𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩𝘦?
𝘞𝘩𝘢𝘵’𝘴 𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘪𝘴 𝘬𝘪𝘭𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘦
𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘦 𝘪𝘴𝘯’𝘵 𝘧𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘢𝘯𝘺 𝘵𝘪𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘰𝘰𝘯
𝘐𝘮 𝘸𝘦𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘥𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘣𝘺 𝘴𝘢𝘥𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴, 𝘤𝘩𝘰𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘨𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘮

𝘈𝘴 𝘐 𝘥𝘳𝘰𝘸𝘯 𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘰𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘳𝘵𝘴 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘵
𝘐 𝘸𝘰𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘮𝘺 𝘭𝘪𝘧𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘴 𝘐 𝘰𝘯𝘭𝘺 𝘴𝘶𝘳𝘷𝘪𝘷𝘪𝘯𝘨?
𝘈𝘭𝘭 𝘐 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘵 𝘪𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘸𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘣𝘢𝘵𝘵𝘭𝘦 𝘐’𝘮 𝘧𝘢𝘵𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨
𝘊𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘋𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘩 : 𝘐𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘉𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨

I want to walk down the street in the midnight lamp posts
I want to drown in the words of these open books
I want to find the path that leads to Atlantis
All of my thoughts are filled with these antics

I want to climb the canvasses stacked in my room
I want to sit for weeks and watch the flowers bloom
I want to swim in the clouds and just sink like the titanic
All of my thoughts are filled with these antics

I want to listen to the wind filled with my favorite songs
I want to dance with my emotions and feel like everything belongs
I want to grab the universe, and hold all of the planets
But i know, I can only dream of these antics

Delicate petals bear delicate souls
Delicate souls bear the truth that's untold
I love the fragility of flowers
The shimmer of their petals rids dour
I wish that the flowers could be people
Then maybe there wouldn’t be much evil

Lily is a darling, sweet and lively
Lilies of the valley, killed by Ivy
Lily’s not like lily of the valley
Lily stays alone, and yet they rally
She is in love with the deep and arcane
Shy, kind words slip off her tongue like her name

Rose, oh Rose, oh how poor Rose doesn’t know
Heart beats louder, than the call of a crow
She crawls in far too deep to save those lost
Oh but she doesn’t know what it’ll cost
Always using her liquid, red, love
Her cherry tears can’t save them from above

Buttercup, gentle but don't let her fool
Her words are savory, her actions jewels
Her charm shines, her wisdom it glitters
She consoles, though it shimmers, it withers
It wears at her lips which leak sweet, gold, ooze
She does it so her sunshine nurtures you

Lotus, she’ll help you wash it all away
Don't even worry, forget all your pain
She is so convincing, she’ll hold your hand
Her breath leaves your mind on a better land
She’ll stay, wise that it’ll hurt you if she leaves
You’ll never be lonely, and never grieve

Marigolds wisdom all lies in the years
Centuries, she has seen all laughter and tears
Her shoulder, always a cradle for minds
And her Bonne Journée at the end of the night
Her wrinkly skin entertains with tales
Think you aren’t needed, for you, she will vail


Daisy, my favorite of all people made
Her heart bursts with life, her skin color drained
Her warm smile will melt your icy darkness
Your self drained soil, now a lively garden
Stop using tears, oceans of misery
Salt isn"t good for the evergreens baby