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Aug 2013 · 14.9k
Dandelions
Jenovah Aug 2013
Dandelions

Hair was long and yellow like pale dandelions;
Complimenting blue eyes, and white skin.

I was drawn into such rare beauty,
such new and unexplored mystery.

New girl in town, a new taste of envy in the air.
I befriended you; I wasn't so quick to judge.

I studied you closely.
I gained your friendship quickly.

I came to know you,
and the worst parts of you.

You lied so beautifully;
Manipulation to a fine perfection.  

Still I followed you,
opened my heart up and fell weak.

You used me all up.
Drained me out;
Out of patience, out of friendship, out of love.

Everybody hated you.
They still hate you, and now I do too.
Aug 2013 · 1.9k
The Alternative
Jenovah Aug 2013
I wanted to burn it all down.
Run away and leave this old town.

I wanted to drown all the ones who wronged me.
Sail away into the peaceful sea.

I wanted to curse my bullies all to hell.
Then be able to leave my comforting shell.

I wanted to seek revenge on that hideous *****,
Then sit on a throne filthy ******* rich.

But instead I found an alternative way to cope.
A way that brought me freedom and hope.

I put it the pen to the paper,
And let my thoughts free- float.
Jul 2013 · 661
Heavy
Jenovah Jul 2013
Holding  you felt like an eternity.
I can still feel you against me.
Your breath a beautiful whisper.
Mine, a gentle purr.

My thoughts hung silently in the air,
Like a bad pesticide.
I drove myself crazy,
I just couldn't decide.

Was it a weight upon my chest?
Or a sleeping lover on my breast?  

I starred into a suffocating darkness.
You were there, but you weren't really there.
Alone, i was fading.
Into the dark nothing.

My body went to sleep,
as you are so heavy in my arms.
Jun 2013 · 414
Cheers
Jenovah Jun 2013
Here's a beer for letting go.
Here's a shot for forgiving.
Here's a toast for happiness.
Here's a bottle for my sorrows.
Here's a bed, for a better tomorrow.
Jun 2013 · 1.7k
A Faded Blue Door
Jenovah Jun 2013
A Faded Blue Door
I used to feel so much.
Now I only feel the cold concrete beneath my feet.
As I stand on this quiet and empty street.
A house stands in front of me.
A home is what it used to be.
With its faded blue door which never did shut right.

Holes in the walls, where bricks used to be.
And standing in the yard an old cheery tree.
It used to be fruitful, now withered and dead.
Under that same tree you made a promise to me,
then carried me upstairs into our warm queen bed.

That same bed where you silently slept,
And I stayed awake as you snored, but I wept.
A promise is a promise, but the promise you never kept.
I hope she felt like silk on your skin,
While trickles of tears sailed down my chin.

An antique bathtub stands proud in the bathroom.
Rusted away, and stained with my blood.
I once filled it with water until it started to flood.
I drowned my sorrows, and vanquished my gloom.

A rickety old porch now crumbling away,
Is the place where I sit day to day.
Pondering, will this ever go away?
Am I doomed  to spend the rest of my life,
As a wandering, sad, old spirit wife?
Jun 2013 · 564
.
Jenovah Jun 2013
.
suffering;there is no way to describe the nauseating misery that torments and suffocates oneself.

Sinking;I have become heavy with sorrow.

drowning;my lungs cannot hold air in them, for they have become weak.

starving;my stomach cannot bear to hold food, when it continuously churns with that love- sick feeling.

aching;every part of me is screaming as it dies, my heart is the loudest as each heart string burns away.

dying;numb I have become numb, and I cannot move nor feel emotion. I blur away into non-existence.A beautiful euphoria.
Apr 2013 · 1.5k
Back Burner.
Jenovah Apr 2013
It burns.
As I sit here on the back burner.

waiting for you, because you know i will.

The sad truth, as pathetic as I am,
Only I can love you this way.

I somehow mastered how to deal with my feelings
around you, by just not having feelings.

There meaningless you said, and will never get me anywhere.
So I still sit here waiting for you, waiting for a warn embrace.

But when you come back for me I am not tenerdly embraced,
I seem to make you sick. But why do you keep me here then?

On this back burner you have me placed.
Is it enlightening to watch me suffer?

You know I will give it all, for one second with you.
It pleases you.

So leave me here again, let me wait some more.
I might just rather sit on this back burner,

Then see your hateful face,
Id rather die in this place,

Then have you here to tell me what I cant feel,
to have you never give me that warm embrace.
Mar 2013 · 593
I Wrote This One For You.
Jenovah Mar 2013
Day in, Day out, we loved each other endlessly.

We Made a Home and fit in Comfortably.

Keeping each other company, just you and me.

Simple happiness made up of Sweet Nothings, I cant put a name on.

Suddenly it went wrong, still Misunderstood I stand

Crying to every love song.

I fight the urge to hold you, I fight it day by day.

This never ending misery is leaving my brain astray.

Part of me has left with you, and It will always be my best part.

Our Love died and lies forgotten, but will always reside

In a crevice of my heart.

I refuse to settle for less,

Knowing i had the absolute best.
Mar 2013 · 26.8k
Orange
Jenovah Mar 2013
Orange, the perfect color for me.
The odd one, the bright one.
Fire is orange and I have fire in me.
Orange is beautiful, I am too you see.
Orange always manages to stand out,
I too stand out,always wanting to fit in.
A tear tickles my chin,
as the thought of never to fit in
swims in my mind.
A friend is what I need,
a friend in orange I always find.
Because you see, orange is the color for me.
Nothing will ever rhyme with orange,
and nobody will ever choose me.
Mar 2013 · 838
Winter Nights
Jenovah Mar 2013
The feeling of your touch replays in my memory.
Your warm embrace haunts me.
My bed does not comfort me anymore.
My sheets still faintly have your sent.
As I lay upon them, I lie miserably.

All these songs we sang don't sound the same.
Our picture hangs depressingly in its frame.
Missing you is eating me alive, but its these winter nights,
oh its these winter nights I miss you the most.
Oct 2012 · 537
Wings to Fly
Jenovah Oct 2012
There was a girl who everyone knew.
Her hair was brown and her eyes were blue.
Every day she dreamed to fly,
So every night she planned to die.
There was a boy who nobody knew.
His face was sad, but his heart was true.
Every day  he dreamed for love.
So every night he prayed ,for an angel from above.
One night a girl got hit by a car.
By a boy who just came from the bar.
The boy stayed forever haunted,
but not for one second did he cry.
Finally someone loved him,
for he had given her, her wings to fly.
Oct 2012 · 4.1k
Ghost
Jenovah Oct 2012
Your as lively as a brick
And cold as ice.
Your clock no longer ticks,
For your time has run out.
Your  forced to wonder about
For all eternity,
But here you can find a friend in me.
I cannot take you above or below,
but here you shall stay.
You always are the same.
Never older, nor younger.
You never tire, nor hunger.
I can always find you in this place,
the place with the stones,
one stone in particular, lies what's left of you.
Your soul and bones.
Oct 2012 · 1.5k
I Dont Want An Apology
Jenovah Oct 2012
I don't want  an apology

and I don't need your sympathy.

See I love the way you look at me

but hate the way you don’t see me.

I love it when u listen

but hate that you don't hear me.

Your confident but selfish

and Im strong but stubborn.

I love the way you hold me

but hate the way you don’t feel me.

I hate to cry in front of you

but I bet you enjoy it.

I didn't know what else to do

so I'd like to dedicate this all to you.

Well here's a grain of salt

and I'd like to say this is my fault

but it took two to play the game.

I bet you’d like me to get all the blame

but baby you brought me into this.

Its funny when I say your name

Id like to laugh in spite of it.

In spite of all the *******.

I hope you find some comfort

in this sad life you have in mind.

Baby your running out of time

running out of words.

You cant fake me into this

you really are absurd.

I don’t believe your flat out the lies.

Baby I can read u like a book

and it only takes one look.

Your not to hard to figure out

your really not a mystery.

but I guess its time to say good bye

to all of are history.

Id like to believe that you loved me

I'd like to say it proudly.

I gave an arm in leg and every thing that I was

and this is what I get from you

a bleeding heart in two.

I hope you can forget me when your lying next her.

but I hope you get the burden

and carry on the weight

that we were once something

even though its something you wish you could hate.

You can't deny the truth

you run and run and run from it

but baby its catching up.

In spite of what you've done to me

baby you are my only one.

It’s hard to live this cruel life

now that we are done

I guess to you it was all fun

and I'd like to end it with a silver shiny gun.
Sep 2012 · 3.6k
Hopeless
Jenovah Sep 2012
years have gone and past.

entirely too fast.

Ive held on to all of you

but this time i think im through.

we all fell apart.

wouldnt have guessed that from the start

they say time will heal it all

but i dont think it could heal the memory.

of you all watching me fall.

forever was a lie

you were never there to say hello

but always quick to say good bye♥
Sep 2012 · 22.9k
Bipolar Friend
Jenovah Sep 2012
Who are you?
You're not the same person you were two minutes ago.
I just don't get you.
You're compulsive, and corrupted.
You're easily addicted.
You have friends in your mind,
but in reality friends you'll never find.
You're simple yet, confusing
like a Rubik's cube.
With all your twists and turns.
This pain you put upon me
has left me with cuts and burns.
Will we ever learn?
To get along
and fix these never ending battles?
Your bipolar versus my anger.
Some days, to me you are a stranger.
Who I thought I knew has suddenly disappeared.
Your disease is something I've always feared.
Illness invaded your mind,
and has taken over who you once were
Leaving all your past senses blind.
Sep 2012 · 964
Heart In A Box
Jenovah Sep 2012
My heart in a box
That you kept
On a shelf
The highest of them all
You locked it
You promised you would never
Need to open it again
You promised my heart would
Stay with you forever
So you threw
That key ever so far
It shone in the sun
As it sailed
So far into the
Never-ending blue
And landed without a sound
And disappeared beneath a blanket
Of water and became a treasure
Within the sea

— The End —