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As it dawned upon them
It was their final chance
To dance through the night

And they danced
Donning the colours
Of the new dawn

As it was
The final countdown
To forevermore

For the words to forge
The unwritten
The written, Unforged
Had been away for a very long time
Hope you all are doing well
Didn’t write much all this while
Hope to write read and share here
Enticement aside,
It’s a terrible game
When the throes of a lifetime
Dwindle to flame,
When the ague of long living
Denudes as it wears,
Where the beauty of youth
Simply mottles and tears.
The effort required
To gamble instead
Realistically questions…
Better off dead?

Standing *****
On a spire of stone
With the world all around
Yet completely alone,
Cold wind caresses
The knowledge of how
Old friends abandon me
Frequently now….
In dying like flies
With unseemly haste,
With a disregard
For my feelings, chaste,
The hollowness
Of last things said,
The bitterness
Of love, lost dead.

Recalling times,
With a cup of tea,
When you and I
Laughed happily.
When sunshine bled
Rich colours sang,
Bluebirds flew
And hot dice ran.
How those days
Caroused with joy
Lost to chance then,
Girl and boy.

With you on my arm,
Dressed to the nines
Bustling charm
Off to roll
The dice with flair
Chortling both,
Without a care..
So simple
Were those days of fun
Where time stood still….

Yet dice still run!

Those running dice
Across the floor
Now, don’t matter
In the morning light
Preempts temptation
To take sight,
For gone the gloss
Tomorrow brings….

Outside, a joyous
Blackbird sings.

13 August 2022
Mists of time, once so vivid, now 5 minutes later, just fade to an inconspicuous fog. But, somewhere, the dice roll on.
 Aug 2022 Deep Ponderer
Everything about you is unexpected
From the vibe when we first spoke
To the safety and peace between us
When I first realized I liked you
I figured the feelings would fade away
Like ashes in the wind
Drifting into nothingness
I didn't think you'd like me back
Or that we'd ever really talk about it
Yet here I am stumbling over myself
Trying to process feelings I don't understand
A complicated and beautiful maze
Walls of green, laced with delicate flowers
On the floor again
Unconscious again
I'm screaming for help again
Dad's working again
You have no memory again
The neighbors took us to the hospital again
Everyone knows your bipolar now
Everyone thinks my mom's crazy
She's not. Why do I have to fight to convince myself she's not.
Mom why do you give up?
Mom what's wrong!?
Mom is it us?
Mom is it dad?
Mom what happened?
The beeping monitor disturbed my thoughts
And there you were again
Yourself, with eyes wide open
And a weak body once more
Being told what you did to *yourself
My mother was diagnosed with bipolar disorder 9 years ago. I found this in one of my books I used to read beside her bed. She takes her meds these days, but my whole life I thought it was my birth or the way my sister and I treat each other that triggered her, but it was her own childhood of being beated and *****
 Sep 2020 Deep Ponderer
I often wish things were different
as if a wish does anything but make me dream
I used to have dreams
but now I live in one
The fog fills my world everyday
I’m on autopilot.
 Sep 2020 Deep Ponderer
Beyond the known into the unknown.
We aim for the Stars that don't twinkle.
Trajectory, to infinity and beyond.
Light-years of light-years, the destination we seek.

It was a lovely morning and the day,
Special, my son’s 16th birthday
Happy and busy with the preparations
But there was something amiss
Couldn’t put my hand or heart on
The day was fine, but by evening there were signs, sickness crept up its way

An out of this world experience
My jumpy heart raced between its place and fist, and the pulse on my wrist
Devoid of any feeling, my fingers numb

The lungs screamed
To be left alone, in silence  
With the painless calm
And the pain, unseen

The chaos outside was too much to bear
My heart weakened by the deafening noise
Wanted this break, from some, I prayed
Believe it or not, god listened to my prayer

Fear disillusioned
Too many places, invited
Never the one to travel
At loss, amidst the chaos

I felt a deep pull
In the eyes of my husband and children
They wanted me to be fit and fine
The other side allured me, twice
In my mind, I swayed on both the sides

I remembered the words and faces of my ageing parents
I knew they would be worried
Parents, never fail you
Wise and old, they have great advice

To stay safe from, I tried, but couldn’t
The virus and I took head on
Single combat, the family safe
No more on the battleground
Self isolation done

Home isolation worked well for me
Locked in my room, with the windows facing the road, my days, alone, duly spent
The room lights on during the nights
Been longing for a break since March
Albeit, in a beach resort

Music has the power to heal
Takes you to places, language free
Pre booking, no requisites
My quarantine sojourn complete

Physically I could be weak
But mentally I am strong
With infinite hope and love of the family
Yes from the clutches of the virus
Came back alive, I survived

If words could speak for themselves
Then they are best, written
Spoken, they are sinusoidal
Unless, the wavelengths match

Thank you so much, my dear friends at Hp
My family of poets and poetesses
For reading my words and sharing yours
It’s always home here, I reckon

It tend to bare my heart here, thanks for bearing with me on HP :)
Was sick since August 26th, now quite fine

My symptoms were moderate
The medication, rest and writing,  together worked as a therapy :) 🙏
the worst
is whirling round
my mind
I hardly dare
take a breath
in case it is
my last
my heart is
beating out of
my pulse quickens
with every blackened
what am I now
but a bag of nerves
fraught and fragile
as crystal
I have written
my life to a
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