Holed up in a closet with half a pint or so
Too slowly disheartening for the time it takes
And far too enigmatic for the plans I've yet to make
Yet I move with every atom drawn emancipated

Yet the context of neurons
And bitter sweet memory all a fabrication
Another thin layer of nostalgia to force feed the sleeping beast
And even as I disregard, it comes up through the latency so brazen
Another helpless mess of chemicals to feast upon

Boring

A **** shame as well
Charismatic yet moments away from being half adjusted
Using every empty vow of justice to reciprocate
He must've mustered every ounce of faith based forgery
And the internal jury applauds

All is for naught, but drowning in waste deep
Self pity is for suckers
I can drown in less than half an inch

Selfishness is only realized once
Pride stops you from making friends
Maybe the fear hits nearer to home
Reopen its wounds like the case that lay dormant but provable
Felonious though it may be once you disregard empathy
You know he did

And yet it bleeds

Still it moves

Cognition taken for granted, but by who?
Sure, the long since departed had so much to lose
But If with every passing breath they would've ****** down oxygen
With the same callousness he possessed
When cutting off their heads

Doesn't the burden fall on you as well...
Sending a man to hell is no easy task

Bask in the grace you made for yourself
Bending the page with ink that you've layerd
With blood and homage to past ruling lieges
That murdered their wives for no ******* reason

Tragedy only strikes in pairs
Taking the same heads off twice
One visible, the other not so much

Hell, I'm the result of a decade or more of some coddle culture
******* left over from safety scissors bound up in bubble wrap
Much to do about feuding parties of mopped up has beens

Gutted and mutilated by the dullest claws, vomiting out soliloquy to someone waiting off screen

Feeding on attention when I've got none left to spend
Endemic of the stations fashioned on the broken bones of little kids
Who do you think you're kidding
Fitting each misfit with a fistful of
Faux Information
And letting them sort it out with perfect indigantion
Each stroke of a pen left blood on the page
And you wage war warning all of the names written
The only fitting way for you to die
Is in the cause you've helped create

Facing facts

Fabrication is largely left to the mental state
Of intoxicated fake plastic yet venomous snakes
Imagination only limited by wavelength
Of who's thoughts can last longest
Who can outlast

What class is the farthest when ranks are displayed
With golden tradition on vest made of clay
Surrounded by privation
Formal ware decays

When dinner jackets are
Met with machine guns

If its won by numbers, the race will all starve and
If science is ******, vanquished gods walk the streets
The enemy is what we've seen in the dreams
Not what befalls us in countless nightmares

Daring

My scrap meat is metal to build my machine
Body of parts I was so denied
Lithe and disjointed
Foraging necessities
Festering sensitivities lead to machinated loss of life

Let it sink

This ship is filling with the inked material lies
You claimed I could safely sail upon
Bailing out every word I despise
Something tells me, I'll find nothing to drown in

Nine o'clock

Weaponry only to serve me in time
Once in the presence of what I will claim is mine
Deep inside, rooted in every peer
Fear is the malady keeping them occupied

Each click represents a reclamation
Every time

A scene that's so endemic of life that you've transpired
As you're using your last cigarette to light a burnt out signal fire

The sparks racing along the edge, friction coming to a head
Entertain my thoughts as you remember that this is just a dream

Each and every time it seems is captured in a frame
Pressed down by the hands of time, and left to rot in flame

Underlying uncertainty, left to my insanity
Entertain my thoughts as I tell you that this is all a dream

If I only had some wings
I'd fly right the **** away
If I had the strength to change
I wouldn't change a single thing

Island paradox
To cut my own arms off
Just to survive, a couple minutes more
Slowly wondering
How much I should sleep
when countless options drift right past my door

And I don't think this is  something to change
Deify the death defying lingering fate
Something, leaning on the plans we make
Before we see the high tide begin to abate

Caught up in the rapids, I feel my life drain from me
Pulled in to the raging sea by the current yet unseen

Caught up in the maelstrom, each second of uncertanty
Leaves me catching my breath, but between every breath

Its all fun and games
Then I try and simplify
But all complacence
Leads to every current in my life

Stupid stuff, looks like
A diamond in the ruff
Wrapped in cellophane
And spray painted gold

Did you find it
A little odd when you
Searched for your alarm clock
And found it silent
Sewn in your violent
Rage induce youth
Machinery ticking out
What time you still had left

Fighting tooth and nail
Got me in this mess
The Diamond glistens as I turn my head away
Fingers are blessed with venom still red
Burning my fingertips with dreams that I still replay

How they left when I dug deep in

I only wish that I could see my face
When
I found out the the change I needed
Wasn't something I could get

Fettered to the cause
Bought and found lacking but marred
By the dept I will own
Who dares atone with
Loans unpaid and hearts now repentant
I will die in iron
Finer than china
As the rust soaks in every bone

I am still saving
I've got so much left to save
I've come to face down the endless possibility

Each second ticks out
A weight bearing down
How we live like
This isn't something

Irreverence still speaks to me
Taunting
With chains soft enough
To make me forget that
I think
I am nothing
And Listlessness still loves me
Dragging me further
Through means of persistance

Ah, but
Am I wrong
...
Do I want to be

And some think the world will go up in flames
When everyone comes into work soaked in gasloline
And when I open the book of the saints
It will be stained with match books and empathy

What will stand
When it stands
What is stained
Burns clean

Life finds a way
To survive despite the simplicity
For the love of death
And/or all that is holy
For the love of what we
All took for granted
And wish less missed the mark
By more that a few inches

Start a fire in the iconoclast kids
And the ghost start coming
Out from the now dead
Endless mystic thought processes
Left amid
Corpses strewn and silent
Disliked and then turned violent
By the hatred brewing
Though well deserved has turned into a fire

Can you force your light
Through this darkness
Keep it stalwart even as the waves crash
Over and around
The endless suffocation
The restless invocation
To open up
The light
Will it still shine at the end

Grinding....

Leaving it silenced, drawn and quartered
Clawing for the scraps left over

Predicament I found myself in
Or, towards the end of it
Slipping from the edges
Forager focused on finding any way back home
Sidetracked by some apparition left crying
Alone, in the corner

Grinding...

Paused, with rain drops weighted, heavy sense in the air
I can feel my lips turning blue and
Twitching

It's more literal than I would dare dream in a waking nightmare
The smell of every molecule tantamount to another realm

Hangs motionless in the air
The stone transposed becomes a rooftop asylum, overlooking such uncouth misanthropic parcels, self absorbed in this grotesque imagery, a veritable wall of self hate puzzle pieces

Grinding...

Low, on an almost ominous note, still grows colder in my ears
Blowing on winds filled with the spite and righteous
Anti holy
Fully rupturing sound of far off laughter of the
New root

My lips still moving
No sound produced
And my mind
Grinding...

I still pray to god for you
Beset on all sides by the same wickedness
Still afflicted by myself

Argue for arguments sake
****** up on the uptake
I thought that you might want it
I guess I forgot all the subtle ways
The fires spring to life at night

Arguably the wrong choice is
Looking at him
I try not to
Catch that glimpse in his eye
Already my mind races
And my bones are shivering
At the thought alone

Brickwork backing
Still swells maggots
And filing paperwork
For entrapment habits

Grinding

Curiosity let me down
Why do I hate what I have found
Why do the walls look awful thin
How long before the sky caves in

But I got hooked on these blue and purple lights
And i found myself in the streetlamps in the dead of night
Crystallizing, like the frost around my rib cage
A palette colder than the snow falling from outer space

Freeing myself From the hands
Finding my life is to my own detriment
Finite, caustic in the games we play
Dissolving underscores the price you paid

Rain drops
Bluer than the sky
Tears of someone high above
Felled in spirit
Will defenseless
Recognizing they were selfish
Despite all my endless walls
Broke the sky down to a fault

And the shards now fall all around
My outstretched arms
And broken heart

Saving grace is in my lungs
Biding up the time here spending
All of it pretend inventing
Ideas for the passing eye
Finding out why days go by

A wooden kid with a furrowed brow
Carved this way and made to wonder how
How long might we survive
Strung up, dancing on this twine
Woven out of atmospheric bitter sweet goodbyes

And the notes that I hum
To pass the time
-------------------
I'll still see you around, right?

Yeah, keep an eye out, I'm sure you'll see me