Lately I've had a weird heart beat
The doctors are concerned
I tell them to take it easy
This is normal
My heart will naturally skip a beat
When I am thinking of you

Dark as night it washes over me.
The waves as dark as those of the Styx.
My Achilles heel has become my whole body.
I shall save two obols for Charon
For every step I feel may be my last.

I sympathize with the moon in the sky
For I too am eternally searching for the light of my world

Farewell good friend
at least I'd like to say.

Your time is here
and I've just come.

I wish I'd known you better
so I could say a proper goodbye.

The stories I've heard
your joys i've missed

how I wish I'd been there
to share those times with you.

Farewell best friend
or so I'd  like to say.

The beat of her heart
Is the steady beat
That I march to

If I had a bus that promised comfort for all
And a ticket for each and every one of you
And said we'll leave tonight
For where, I don't rightly know, but we will just drive for the sake of being anywhere but here.
If I promised you that at some point we will reach out destinations,
I wonder,
Just how many of you would punch your ticket...

I'd give it all up
If you would please
Just be you again.

To you who were first among the rest:
        You gave me my first taste of soft, supple lips. You were also the one who opened my eyes to heartbreak. I loved you and my heart has yet to forget you.

To the one who came next, the one second in line:
        You were a diamond in the rough, often overlooked.
We clashed like fire and water, creating steam that fueled our loved for one another. We would go back and forth, sometimes for hours on end, trying to convince ourselves we each loved the other more. We never did discover our answer, but can something infinite be bested?

To you thrice in line, most recent in time:
        You hold galaxies in your eyes, you are endlessly creative and imaginative. You were the one who struggled with life, but who never let anyone else face life alone. You always knew just how to leave a smile upon my face. You were gentle and caring, but protective with love, I was never going anywhere expect by your side. We ruled OUR world, creating our perfect future together... I'm still realizing that perfect just isn't.

To you who shall come fourth in line, now or in future times:
        I wish for it to be you who holds my hand in life and to be the one who holds me memory till the end of eternity.

There so much I want to say to my dear old friend...
But I doubt I could even manage to hold my pen in my hands...

People will say that they've fallen in love
But I'm a little different from the masses
I tripped over my own two feet
And stumbled my way into your life
And you caught me with your love

Little lady,
would you like to borrow mine?
So you could see like I do,
Clear as the summer sky,
All your beauty,
All your grace,
All those smiles,
That belong on your face.

Little lady, little lady,
Try my glasses on for size.

Love is the thing that can bring you back from your lowest of lows.
Unfortunately, the loss of it is often the thing that puts you at your lowest.

Self-harm scars tell a story
Of who a person is
And what they're going through
But all too often
The stories they tell
Have a storybook ending
Like something from the brothers Grimm
Telling instead,
The story
Of what they went through
And who a person was...

We can't change our fate? Our destinies are set?

Who was the one to determine this? The one who now brings so much inescapable sorrow.

How do I comfort my girlfriend, tears falling from her eyes, when nothing I do can change the outcome?

I guess sometimes we're stuck with our lot in life. No sense in trying to change it, right?

Maybe so, but seeing those glimmering tears fall from her eyes I shall not accept this. I shall change the outcome and make the world a better place.

I know I can't fix everything and I know I can't save everyone, but **** please let me save her.

Fire

So many people say lighting fires makes them calm or feel better even.

Why?

Because fire is destructive and in those moments we have created this mass of heat and ash that could take down our neighborhoods if we tipped over the pit... yet we have taken control of it. This monstrous snake that eats away at all in its path is under our thumbs. We decided how large it grows. We tell it when to stop. I think people love playing with fire so much because we cannot control our own fires in our lives. The things that eat away at us day after day are escaping from our grasp. They become the orange and red seas that flood our hearts and spill out onto our wrists.

Harmless campfires satisfy our thirst to overcome the hellish pits of our minds.

- Yacinia Agosto
- 10/13/16

Some write to fight
To fight the demons of the night.
Some write to delight
To bring laughter to the night.
Others still write to tell of their plight
Of the struggle to survive the night.
Many write to feel bright
Creating light from the darkness of the night.
Why do I write?
And why mostly at night?
I strive to feel alive
And I thrive
As I begin to fight
The monsters of tonight.

To those hidden under blankets, huddled close to their lovers:
     There are some among us who are wrapped in blankets of our own tears.

To those who purse their lips in a smile as soft melodies floating through the air lull you to sleep:
     There are those of us who write sleepless lullabies on our arms with the sharp embrace of the blade, our only comfort.

They say the good die young
But is that really so?

More so sometimes
It seems we're left to suffer.

Enduring the torment and scrutiny of every eye in the world.

It seems we're everyone's best friend
Until everyone forgets about us.

In the end I guess we might as well be dead.

Everyone's already forgot about us.

And I've been told that there are others
But that is exactly why they are others
Because they are everyone other than you

My heart
Like any other muscle
Will rebuild itself
So it is stronger
And harder than it was
Before it broke.

I just pray
That my own heart
Does not become so strong
Because if it does
It will be
Like a heart of freezing stone.

I love you, she said
I know, he replied sleepily
Lost in each other's eyes

If I could sing, I would write the melody of us in the key of happiness

If I could draw, I would paint a portrait of you just so you could always see the beauty that I do.

If I could dance, I would dance the night away with you in a fit of burning passion.

I may not be able to do every wonderful thing I wish I could for you, but I can write and these words are what I can offer. Will you please accept them and hold them close to your heart?

My blood is the ink
And my body your canvas.
Like an artist crazed, you tear me open ever more
So not to run out of paint.
It's time I shout: never more
And stitch myself shut tight
And store my beautiful colors inside.

This isn't a poem and it's not meant to be. I just want to make one thing clear. This is more of a rant so ignore this if you'd rather not read. My girlfriend broke up with me tonight. She keeps telling me I'm an amazing guy that I'm a great guy. But yet she's leaving me. For another person nonetheless. The things that does to a person... To be told that they're so amazing that their girlfriend is about to leave them behind for somebody else. I really don't know how to deal with this. I'm trying not to just stay here in my brand bawl my eyes out.

I promised you I would never leave.
I swore to myself I would never let you go.

I've still kept my promise.
I still haven't let you go.

But you've just disappeared.
Vanished without a trace.

When I told you I loved you, I meant it. When you told me the same I believed that it was true. But it seems that wasn't quite so. Did you really mean it? Or was it a fleeting feeling that you couldn't be bothered to chase?

Loneliness is the pill you forgot you swallowed.

Tasteless and formless
Moment by moment
It chokes me to death.

When you said we needed to slow things down
I didn't think that meant you'd leave me here, frozen in time.

I dont know anymore,
I'm spending too much time
Staring off into the great beyond
Beyond these four walls
Beyond these bounds in my mind
Hands tied, mouth gagged.

Are you made?
I'm not angry or mad.
Then what are you?
I dont know.

I've always asked for the truth
And I'll return nothing but the same.
So honey, please, give me just this moment,
Just this second of respite.

Take all the time you need
To figure things out.

Pardon me sweetheart,
I don't mean for you to rush,
Please take your time
And use it to its fullest.

I wish I would take
my own ******* advice,

If only I could hear myself speak,
But these voices in my head
Are screaming.

God, please, honey save me
Friend please don't let this
Be the quiet bang
That we go out with.

Because while your time is spent
Shaping your mind
And your future,
I've started talking to these
******* walls, surely they
Are friendlier than those
That speak inside my head.

Save me please
Before I melt away
With these voices
That surround me
All the time.

When I see you
Every day feels like Christmas
Because if giving is truly better than receiving
Than I'd give you the entire world
And set it in the palm of your hand
But as I am just me
And I am unable to give you the world
Please let me be
Some of the happiest memories you ever create

If somebody must suffer
Oh then please let it be me
I'll walk in solemn darkness
Just to give you light.

I've faced my demons
And I'll face yours just the same
I'll dance with them
As I did my own
I've danced with the devil
For nights unending.

Give me your pain
And free yourself
Surely I
Can take the burden
After all I may just be human
But sometimes
That's just the best **** thing to be.

When she's at her best, so am I.
When he rocks the world, I'm right by his side.
When they strike just the right chord, I'm there strumming along.
When she is under the weather, my umbrella tries to cover us both.
When her smile fades, my smile is wiped blank too.

However one fear remains. In the chaos of empathy, when I am laid bare, am I still I?
Or have I become all the he's, she's, they, and thems that I appear to mimic.

Am I still I? Or is I like my shadow? Something that only exists because of another?

I'm falling safely
Into your arms.
Oh?
Where did you go?

I crave not the one that takes my breath away
Instead, give me the one that makes me forget to breath

Everyone tells me I can do better.
But what can be better than perfect?
For she was exactly that.

Since schools let out, I haven't seen you.
Have you been busy?

When I call you, you are never there.
Did your phone die?

When I look for you, you are nowhere to be found.
Are you hiding?

If I were to search for you, it would be for naught.
Have you led me astray?

Through all this searching, one thought has lingered in mind: Am I the one who's vanished?

There's so many things I want to say.
So so very many feelings to write about and get off my chest.
The worlds spinning way too fast for me to follow.
Oh well, I guess. Sometimes there just isn't anything left to say.

Love is blind
But I am not
And now I
Must watch you
Fall in love
With someone else.

My dear, we've both hit rock by before
Smashed, crashed, and burned
But now take my hand
We'll let the wind hit our wings
And now we'll take flight
Let's fly away
And find our own little world.

How can I begin to speak of her beauty

When just her smile leaves me speechless?