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"unutterable" poems
I see around me tombstones grey Stretching their shadows far away. Beneath the turf my footsteps tread Lie low and lone the silent dead - Beneath the turf - beneath the mould - Forever dark, forever cold - And my eyes cannot hold the tears That memory hoards from vanished years For Time and Death and Mortal pain Give wounds that will not heal again - Let me remember half the woe I've seen and heard and felt below, And Heaven itself - so pure and blest, Could never give my spirit rest - Sweet land of light! thy children fair Know nought akin to our despair - Nor have they felt, nor can they tell What tenants haunt each mortal cell, What gloomy guests we hold within - Torments and madness, tears and sin! Well - may they live in ectasy Their long eternity of joy; At least we would not bring them down With us to weep, with us to groan, No - Earth would wish no other sphere To taste her cup of sufferings drear; She turns from Heaven with a careless eye And only mourns that we must die! Ah mother, what shall comfort thee In all this boundless misery? To cheer our eager eyes a while We see thee smile; how fondly smile! But who reads not through that tender glow Thy deep, unutterable woe: Indeed no dazzling land above Can cheat thee of thy children's love. We all, in life's departing shine, Our last dear longings blend with thine; And struggle still and strive to trace With clouded gaze, thy darling face. We would not leave our native home For any world beyond the Tomb. No - rather on thy kindly breast Let us be laid in lasting rest; Or waken but to share with thee A mutual immortality -
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I see around me tombstones grey
I see around me tombstones grey Stretching their shadows far away. Beneath the turf my footsteps tread Lie low and lone the silent dead - Beneath the turf - beneath the mould - Forever dark, forever cold - And my eyes cannot hold the tears That memory hoards from vanished years For Time and Death and Mortal pain Give wounds that will not heal again - Let me remember half the woe I've seen and heard and felt below, And Heaven itself - so pure and blest, Could never give my spirit rest - Sweet land of light! thy children fair Know nought akin to our despair - Nor have they felt, nor can they tell What tenants haunt each mortal cell, What gloomy guests we hold within - Torments and madness, tears and sin! Well - may they live in ectasy Their long eternity of joy; At least we would not bring them down With us to weep, with us to groan, No - Earth would wish no other sphere To taste her cup of sufferings drear; She turns from Heaven with a careless eye And only mourns that we must die! Ah mother, what shall comfort thee In all this boundless misery? To cheer our eager eyes a while We see thee smile; how fondly smile! But who reads not through that tender glow Thy deep, unutterable woe: Indeed no dazzling land above Can cheat thee of thy children's love. We all, in life's departing shine, Our last dear longings blend with thine; And struggle still and strive to trace With clouded gaze, thy darling face. We would not leave our native home For any world beyond the Tomb. No - rather on thy kindly breast Let us be laid in lasting rest; Or waken but to share with thee A mutual immortality -
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46
Erstwhile, i cared for none But now i have a promise To the Lord that i can be As worthy as a servant should be   The earth is my battlefield   Amid in the evil, wearily i stand A relentless battle to survive Trying hard to stay alive. Each day I'm faced with opponent In an arena crowded with temptation. Masters of the dark distort my spirit, In their deadly game, i am but a pawn. So weak, i tremble with fear. This unutterable battle, i am bound to lose. Lord, send forth thy holy warrior And save me O Lord, make haste. He knows my every weakness. My weakness his console, But, Lord have mercy on me For you said "My power works best in weakness." Permit me as your lowly servant if i deserve, And send me forth to justify the truth. Nurture me under Your grace And i will build in You a strong faith.   As a roaring lion he may come, But i will stand still and never move. For i have faith in You Lord  I will rejoice and forever be glad.   Lord, make me wise That i may know his cunning ways,  Make a shield around me And wrap me in Your loving arms.   I will watch and pray Lest i get weary, I have a life to sacrifice, A heart to give.   Lord, have patience with me "O Lord, do not rebuke me in your anger, Nor chasten me in Your hot displeasure." For i am but dust and You are my saviour.  I will prove to be your worthy servant, I will honor Your grace and love, Till the day i hear the trumpet, In that day, i will greatly rejoice. AMEN..
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Apr 15, 2016
Apr 15, 2016 at 8:08 PM UTC
My Prayer
I How should I seek to make a song for thee When all my music is to moan thy name? That long sad monotone - the same - the same - Matching the mute insatiable sea That throbs with life's bewitching agony, Too long to measure and too fierce to tame! An hurtful joy, a fascinating shame Is this great ache that grips the heart of me. Even as a cancer, so this passion gnaws Away my soul, and will not ease its jaws Till I am dead. Then let me die! Who knows But that this corpse committed to the earth May be the occasion of some happier birth? Spring's earliest snowdrop? Summer's latest rose? II Thou knowest what asp hath fixed its lethal tooth In the white breast that trembled like a flower At thy name whispered. thou hast marked how hour By hour its poison hath dissolved my youth, Half skilled to agonise, half skilled to soothe This passion ineluctable, this power Slave to its single end, to storm the tower That holdeth thee, who art Authentic Truth. O golden hawk! O lidless eye! Behold How the grey creeps upon the shuddering gold! Still I will strive! That thou mayst sweep Swift on the dead from thine all-seeing steep - And the unutterable word by spoken.
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The Mantra-Yoga
You Are untamed Reckless blood and wit intertwined A twisted, brazen
 mind. Your mind Is so clearly different It leaps and soars, so acrobatic And your thoughts appear to me so hazy and enigmatic Your mind is simply not pragmatic Yet your perception knows no bounds. You have thoughts that come close to insanity That sometimes flow in the form of profanity.    Your spirit Is either very high or very low Up and down, to and fro There is no in between for you Some say you are stupidly crazy The dull ones say that, the ones too lazy To see beyond the rugged surface. The subdued and vapid ones Will never understand the magnetism Of your sweet, exquisite devilry. On your face you often wear A fierce and restless stare A wan, discontented expression As though you're always awaiting Something bigger, Something better. You Are fluid, swaying fire And I will never tire Of watching you burn I can see you brain boil and churn As it reels into into areas of
 madness and chaos. Your psyche Is an endless field of dark reverie, Of fear and vagary. I know your night terrors Your savage dreams of death Screams and bated breath Unutterable visions The grotesque world of horror thats spins itself out And dribbles into your drawings All those creatures, skeletons gnashing and clawing... You Are gentle and thoughtful Yet you are terrified Of this dark thing that sleeps within you. Your eyes - they’re stunning They’re tempestuous, Wild, like some fierce animal peering out of a rusted cage Oh, your eyes They are something beautiful, but annihilating Like Autumn crocus flowers, innocently poisonous Lids splaying delicately like its violet leaves. You are tall and strong And uncontrollable, And your smile Is the biggest paradox I've ever encountered Childlike And fatal. You are not A creature of the commonplace You are not a slave of the ordinary You are not a mindless drudge of the mundane You are free. Or bewitched, what's the difference
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Mar 10, 2013
Mar 10, 2013 at 5:21 PM UTC
You Are Insane
You Are untamed Reckless blood and wit intertwined A twisted, brazen
 mind. Your mind Is so clearly different It leaps and soars, so acrobatic And your thoughts appear to me so hazy and enigmatic Your mind is simply not pragmatic Yet your perception knows no bounds. You have thoughts that come close to insanity That sometimes flow in the form of profanity.    Your spirit Is either very high or very low Up and down, to and fro There is no in between for you Some say you are stupidly crazy The dull ones say that, the ones too lazy To see beyond the rugged surface. The subdued and vapid ones Will never understand the magnetism Of your sweet, exquisite devilry. On your face you often wear A fierce and restless stare A wan, discontented expression As though you're always awaiting Something bigger, Something better. You Are fluid, swaying fire And I will never tire Of watching you burn I can see you brain boil and churn As it reels into into areas of
 madness and chaos. Your psyche Is an endless field of dark reverie, Of fear and vagary. I know your night terrors Your savage dreams of death Screams and bated breath Unutterable visions The grotesque world of horror thats spins itself out And dribbles into your drawings All those creatures, skeletons gnashing and clawing... You Are gentle and thoughtful Yet you are terrified Of this dark thing that sleeps within you. Your eyes - they’re stunning They’re tempestuous, Wild, like some fierce animal peering out of a rusted cage Oh, your eyes They are something beautiful, but annihilating Like Autumn crocus flowers, innocently poisonous Lids splaying delicately like its violet leaves. You are tall and strong And uncontrollable, And your smile Is the biggest paradox I've ever encountered Childlike And fatal. You are not A creature of the commonplace You are not a slave of the ordinary You are not a mindless drudge of the mundane You are free. Or bewitched, what's the difference
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67
How many million galaxies there are Who knows? and each has countless stars in it, And each rolls through eternities afar Beneath the threshold of the Infinite. How is it that will all that space to roam I should have found this mote that spins and leaps In what unutterable sunlight, foam Of what unfathomable starry deeps Who knows!? And how this thousand million souls And half a thousand million souls of earth That swarm, all bound for unimagined goals, All pioneers of death enrolled at birth, How were they swept away before my sight, That I might stand upon the single ***** Of infinite space and time as infinite, Who knows? Yet here I stand, climacteric, Having found you. Was it by fall of chance? Then what a stake against what odds I have won! Was it determined in God's ordinance? Then wondrous love and pity for His son! Or was it part of an eternal law? Then how ineffably beneficent! Each thought excites an ecstasy of awe, A rapture rending the mind's firmament. Infinity -yet you and I have met. Eternity -yet hand in hand we run. All odds that I should lose you or forget, But, soul and spirit and body, we are one. Is this the child of Chance, or Law, or Will? Is None or All or One to thank for this? It will not matter if thanksgiving fill The endless empyrean with a kiss.
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Long Odds
~ " ~ through this twilight universe where poor ghosts, breathing dreams like air wander they walked along the moon-lit gravel into a bright rosy colored space boats against the current frightened but graceful, on the edge of a deathless song a stir and bustle among the stars as she blossomed for him like a flower pervading the air with shades and echoes of still vibrant emotions against the blue cool limit of the sky he forever wed his unutterable visions to her perishable breath and so they drove on toward death through the cooling twilight ~ " ~
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Mar 9, 2013
Mar 9, 2013 at 5:46 PM UTC
Gatsby
For eons untold I have watched you rise and fall. Build empires and break them. Cure diseases and be ailed by them. I have watched you commune in many religious ways… watched you slaughter for your faith. Now that the darkness has dawned, finally I have come, soaring towards you. As the farmer brings his harvest home, the librarian pores over long forgotten a tome, whilst the piper flutes a final tone. Echoes from my insides a most peculiar and maddening drone. Too long soils you have stained with blood, bygone your time of breeding. Your cancerous race, your viral existence… Put out of its misery soon enough. I soar, adorned in shrouds of doom and gloom, my wings blowing frigid winds and blotting out the moon. Unseen horror, hidden in the darkest nooks of your feeble minds. The stalking predator that lurks near the sheep pen. Crypt born from the graven mounds of a long stained and rotten memory. Ancient pillars carved for me, worshiping us. No atonement can there be for the existence of human sin. Only to rend and tear your fleshy vessels. In a nuclear chaos confounded to the self-made oblivion, the blindfold to not see, the unutterable horror that is me… Flee… If it makes you feel safe and sanctified. You will feel my leering gaze and gaping maw wherever you may hide. Sleep will creep upon you somehow. Like in times of old, there are some stories they left untold. To prevent further damnation and total extinction, the worship of the gods of all creation. Floating in a sea most nebulous, blackened and foul, adrift outside of the play garden of time and space, there live things without a face. The piping of mad flutes a harbinger of my coming, a blazing star to wipe the slate clean. Not even a faint echo will remain. Go out while you can… Walk hand in hand into extinction as brothers and sister, opting out of a raw deal. The last midnight for the human race… A cancerous vile growth that only thrives for our amusement…
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Jul 11, 2018
Jul 11, 2018 at 7:52 PM UTC
Stygian Death Shrouds
For eons untold I have watched you rise and fall. Build empires and break them. Cure diseases and be ailed by them. I have watched you commune in many religious ways… watched you slaughter for your faith. Now that the darkness has dawned, finally I have come, soaring towards you. As the farmer brings his harvest home, the librarian pores over long forgotten a tome, whilst the piper flutes a final tone. Echoes from my insides a most peculiar and maddening drone. Too long soils you have stained with blood, bygone your time of breeding. Your cancerous race, your viral existence… Put out of its misery soon enough. I soar, adorned in shrouds of doom and gloom, my wings blowing frigid winds and blotting out the moon. Unseen horror, hidden in the darkest nooks of your feeble minds. The stalking predator that lurks near the sheep pen. Crypt born from the graven mounds of a long stained and rotten memory. Ancient pillars carved for me, worshiping us. No atonement can there be for the existence of human sin. Only to rend and tear your fleshy vessels. In a nuclear chaos confounded to the self-made oblivion, the blindfold to not see, the unutterable horror that is me… Flee… If it makes you feel safe and sanctified. You will feel my leering gaze and gaping maw wherever you may hide. Sleep will creep upon you somehow. Like in times of old, there are some stories they left untold. To prevent further damnation and total extinction, the worship of the gods of all creation. Floating in a sea most nebulous, blackened and foul, adrift outside of the play garden of time and space, there live things without a face. The piping of mad flutes a harbinger of my coming, a blazing star to wipe the slate clean. Not even a faint echo will remain. Go out while you can… Walk hand in hand into extinction as brothers and sister, opting out of a raw deal. The last midnight for the human race… A cancerous vile growth that only thrives for our amusement…
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11
"Sweet, thou art pale." "More pale to see, Christ hung upon the cruel tree And bore His Father's wrath for me." "Sweet, thou art sad." "Beneath a rod More heavy, Christ for my sake trod The winepress of the wrath of God." "Sweet, thou art weary." "Not so Christ: Whose mighty love of me suffic'd For Strength, Salvation, Eucharist." "Sweet, thou art footsore." "If I bleed, His feet have bled; yea in my need His Heart once bled for mine indeed." "Sweet, thou art young." "So He was young Who for my sake in silence hung Upon the Cross with Passion wrung." "Look, thou art fair." "He was more fair Than men, Who deign'd for me to wear A visage marr'd beyond compare." "And thou hast riches." "Daily bread: All else is His: Who, living, dead, For me lack'd where to lay His Head." "And life is sweet." "It was not so To Him, Whose Cup did overflow With mine unutterable woe." "Thou drinkest deep." "When Christ would sup. He drain'd the dregs from out my cup: So how should I be lifted up?" "Thou shalt win Glory." "In the skies, Lord Jesus, cover up mine eyes Lest they should look on vanities." "Thou shalt have Knowledge." "Helpless dust! In . Thee, O Lord, I put my trust: Answer Thou for me, Wise and Just." "And Might."-- "Get thee behind me. Lord, Who hast redeem'd and not abhorr'd My soul, oh keep it by Thy Word."
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The Three Enemies
Despair is an old company In lighter days he’s the shadow overcasting every object In darker days he’s the strongest Strangling and suffocating Clouding all reasons for treason Was he born with me, I always think he lived this world long before I did How he found me how I wish he never did Despair is an old felony He lived longer than any of us, and he will live longer than any of us To love him is unutterable But to let him linger or to let him pass for another time That might be a way
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Jan 30, 2015
Jan 30, 2015 at 12:58 AM UTC
Despair
I wish I did not love you're aphrodisiac smiles; 'cause here I am now, always out of my mind: you've invaded my heart with all these crazy things, it might be, you're the first one who switched this heart on again. I wish I haven't seen you for those one happiness, 'cause I don't know when to start walking to these paces: I wish I never listened to your sweetest voice, I'm confused; never knew what have brought me upon this choice. I'm going in circles, turning round and round and always drifting whenever you are around: I wish I haven't talked to you since the first time, it might be, you're the first one to be there next to mine. You're so beautiful to both, inside and out and your love is the only reason for this drought: I wish I never aimed high to reach your loving hands, 'cause every time I'm an inch from you, I keep falling into the ground. I don't want love 'cause I know what it does, but I can't get rid from touching the clouds of doubts: I hate to love you, but I keep wishing you to be my guide, and I keep on dreaming how I could say these unutterable emotions inside.
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Oct 19, 2011
Oct 19, 2011 at 6:54 PM UTC
Unutterable Emotions
Piercing the inner Sanctum The trivial the less important will never even get a start into the bastion of peace and well being that is Sacred and defended to the last breath the one irresistible caller that is never barred and who is as a Master key is beauty to no avail can you post guards loveliness has no comparisons like spectacle in any And all forms it governs and rules all of our hearts once seen the invitation is never with drawn like the Vistas seen from a high mountain incomparable glory is touched sequestered in depths of appreciation Moments of grandeur with this spell compression is ultimate the thick richness slowly sinks beyond all Comprehension it will linger for a life time the blues are the high honor of dress befitting a person of Rare quality to have and squander cherished gifts the emptiness can never be measured but to make Contact with the sublime on a desert plane the one invaluable gift of solitude no pretense or frivolity To cause error or a missed chance to speak and hear wonders undeniable voice that is attended by rare Essences of tranquility that robes itself in splendor it beckons in pure language simplicity that astounds Bewilderment of the highest order lodges in your soul the hush of holy beings are noticed if only by the Assured peace that builds a walled fortress nothing can assail these attainments visited and began by The unutterable beauty that moves with conscious and deliberate design to bestow upon you the Perfection that once ruled in Eden
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Mar 1, 2012
Mar 1, 2012 at 2:20 PM UTC
Piercing the inner Sanctum
Piercing the inner Sanctum The trivial the less important will never even get a start into the bastion of peace and well being that is Sacred and defended to the last breath the one irresistible caller that is never barred and who is as a Master key is beauty to no avail can you post guards loveliness has no comparisons like spectacle in any And all forms it governs and rules all of our hearts once seen the invitation is never with drawn like the Vistas seen from a high mountain incomparable glory is touched sequestered in depths of appreciation Moments of grandeur with this spell compression is ultimate the thick richness slowly sinks beyond all Comprehension it will linger for a life time the blues are the high honor of dress befitting a person of Rare quality to have and squander cherished gifts the emptiness can never be measured but to make Contact with the sublime on a desert plane the one invaluable gift of solitude no pretense or frivolity To cause error or a missed chance to speak and hear wonders undeniable voice that is attended by rare Essences of tranquility that robes itself in splendor it beckons in pure language simplicity that astounds Bewilderment of the highest order lodges in your soul the hush of holy beings are noticed if only by the Assured peace that builds a walled fortress nothing can assail these attainments visited and began by The unutterable beauty that moves with conscious and deliberate design to bestow upon you the Perfection that once ruled in Eden
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16
Save for the tramlines marked seafoam white across my forearm, the evidence of my obsession, my fetish for all that has passed remains unutterable. And we could kiss in a film still moment that I play so incessantly in my head. We could. But it will ring. Discordant and a lie, our blackened lungs telling all of the innocence we left behind. The school bells chime, also out of tune but in time with the slap of my hardened feet on these city streets. Oh, I could smoke under the bottle green bridge, adult and proper with ash disturbed into the fibres of my jeans. I could. I could tempt the hand of death; otherwise fold under the weight of your eyes that stare back at me every time I close mine. You chase me through photographs, polygraphs. A lie, a lie, I conjure a lie to sleep between to lie within a cut of skin. Would you marry the middle C? Hammer the strings twice for yes to meet me halfway. For now I will hold the fort. A thought please, as I wait under the eaves of the dripping tiles for all of you to quit playing adults, and return to me.
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May 16, 2013
May 16, 2013 at 5:16 PM UTC
Boomerang
My stronger warrior soul is confused and lost Longing to be free from the visit of unpleasant thoughts For five years, I was a wanderer between the glorious light and the evil of darkness Which  seldom renders me adrift but often empty and frightened I would only try to dismiss the spell, the fight Then battle to find my soul and to restore my heart At length, amidst these giant storms and misery Never would my tongue reveal my real unutterable agony But the memories of the past became too haunting, more violent And now I’m at the edge of the dark and eternal uncertainty For sometime, I continued to believe that the nightmare was gone That my visions were blessed with joy, and my dreams were untroubled Suddenly, I awoke with the same frightful dream as before The devil visited me again in my hours of sleep Where did he get his powers and permission to torture me? I contemplated one more time and realized I understood why I dread my dreary destiny I have not completely forgiven the devil for what he has done to me So now to release myself from the chain of pain and suffering I’m breaking free from the sweet revenge I daily seek As I command my wings to flee from hell and whisper my forgiveness I heard a hymn from my  guardian angel’s melodic voice A wonderful prayer for my deliverance
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Jun 2, 2019
Jun 2, 2019 at 12:49 PM UTC
I’ve Forgiven the Devil
In here a groan rises as a mist, a guttural prayer in coughed blood. The candlelight whispers an unutterable secret on every rafter. Heaving over his leaden spine he wonders when does death become something breathtaking. And not a voyage back somewhere he knows, as he thinks to a picture of England that bore him a son and wife And every Friday night at the Red Lion And darts and a pint. And his rifle. He saw god once in his child and once in a French field hospital as a man with metal red spit lain on his back.
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Jan 21, 2013
Jan 21, 2013 at 9:16 AM UTC
Field Hospital
vertigo hallway I make my way down tilt-a-whirl dark hallways eyes of persons in paintings following my trek through the dark. and I hear it-- I've gone in search of its source as it sounds in the blackness of dead time and I see no mouth making any noise as I spiral through ennui I reach a threshold disoriented & lost, now, I die with the dark and yet, I still hear them through the snaps and crackles and drafts of a quiet nightly home clearer than a bell, I hear whispers from the dark I'm telling you - almost like a shadow leaning up-close to my ear faintly drawling, in some unutterable alien muffled tongue maddened by noise I continue Determined to source this phenomena I always end in the same room and as a metal gate rolls shut behind I finally realize.
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Feb 12, 2013
Feb 12, 2013 at 6:57 PM UTC
Whispers from the Dark
I cannot stand it, it weakens my core, it stifles my breath The thought of him, forcing himself inside you Making you whimper, unutterable sounds Your unconditional complicity a gift, a given Your abandon knowing no bounds My manhood shriven While I have dropped off the edge of your world Your shapely limbs around him furled And he, firmer, faster, harder, smarter, younger Scoops up your jewels and riches with ardent hands And hungry tongues, to burst your lungs And all you can eats from your smouldering smorgasbord And I don’t know him, nor where he lives But I know he lives And dies, and dies again in your scented garden….
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Aug 28, 2018
Aug 28, 2018 at 12:56 AM UTC
Love-bombed, devalued, discarded
Distant as the far-off maritime state, undeniable as the endless mismatch of rock turmoil in the centre of the Earth, and as vital as the pound of flesh, pulp and lung, tired bronchiole, wasted lyric, and cancer's ever-present weight upon your mind. Familiar as your lover's intonation, as she asks of the breadth of your love, attractive as the modest celebrity, with legs splayed in bronzed celebration of this, her life's affirmation. Bound as the pages of your old journal, full of misdirected sorrow and old, old love. Curtailed as the dance floors abandoned at request of the lights, sugared, spilt drinks to rot the wooden boarding, now devoted to misery-cleaners and the bringers of tomorrow. Firewalled as the world is to debt. Cardboard shop-fronts, straw-men hippies and bent products, cash out at Christmas, then a haemorrhage in the New Year of old floods and foreclosures. Covered up as is the rusted kettle to stifle flame. Lost as flavour is to ketchup, as winter is to hope of heat, to desire of spring and the end of forever-night. Thin as my wrists, as hands hold the banister, gaining small balance in life's rare incline, long stripped of exercise, of enterprise. Unutterable as the soul-sounds I feel when I pick up the guitar, as unattainable in this life, as is beauty once my knotted fingers press consciously upon the strings. A truth legacy found in blood and distortion, found in intuitive drives, warped by consumption. Dismissed theory of Atlantean ties, of old Babylon and Reptilian lullabies. Luring, luring, luring to distraction, into the night and the plight, into the absence of Arcturian light! Keep close to me, please, oh, feeble recollection, please take me to truth, in this, my meditation.
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Jan 30, 2014
Jan 30, 2014 at 1:59 PM UTC
Arcturian Light
Distant as the far-off maritime state, undeniable as the endless mismatch of rock turmoil in the centre of the Earth, and as vital as the pound of flesh, pulp and lung, tired bronchiole, wasted lyric, and cancer's ever-present weight upon your mind. Familiar as your lover's intonation, as she asks of the breadth of your love, attractive as the modest celebrity, with legs splayed in bronzed celebration of this, her life's affirmation. Bound as the pages of your old journal, full of misdirected sorrow and old, old love. Curtailed as the dance floors abandoned at request of the lights, sugared, spilt drinks to rot the wooden boarding, now devoted to misery-cleaners and the bringers of tomorrow. Firewalled as the world is to debt. Cardboard shop-fronts, straw-men hippies and bent products, cash out at Christmas, then a haemorrhage in the New Year of old floods and foreclosures. Covered up as is the rusted kettle to stifle flame. Lost as flavour is to ketchup, as winter is to hope of heat, to desire of spring and the end of forever-night. Thin as my wrists, as hands hold the banister, gaining small balance in life's rare incline, long stripped of exercise, of enterprise. Unutterable as the soul-sounds I feel when I pick up the guitar, as unattainable in this life, as is beauty once my knotted fingers press consciously upon the strings. A truth legacy found in blood and distortion, found in intuitive drives, warped by consumption. Dismissed theory of Atlantean ties, of old Babylon and Reptilian lullabies. Luring, luring, luring to distraction, into the night and the plight, into the absence of Arcturian light! Keep close to me, please, oh, feeble recollection, please take me to truth, in this, my meditation.
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49
I have waited in certain landlocked towns, Near and far, and far from here. And I have sailed and been in low ports found, Their inlets clad in salted air. And I have dreamed on oft spoken of starry nights and on largely unspoken starless nights, Of select places with opportune and tactless new found faces. And I have lain out restless and uncomfortably awake, Hearing human voices shriek and drown, In salt clad harbor towns, And heard those specific siren calls of those particular siren girls, In those inlets, salt clad by the sea. And still awake I have heard, in those waiting-space landlocked towns, Curiously, those curious sounds, Of only human and yet inhumane calls. Dressed in that specific gauze of an agony-tone, For that specific landlocked home, Where drinkers go, That drunkard’s throne, And been sullen at that once and forever shoreless drone. And I have also been, you see, in places left unknown. And in a daydream I would hear and be heard by almost gasping voices, From waking and still somehow sleeping and unbelieving men. Grasping out onto air that has been made thin and further, Been gasping. Searching for woefully inaccurate words, With a woefully inarticulate tongue, And I have danced and been set atremble by the timbre of your breathe And then enamored by the resonance of your gasp, And I have gasped with a tongue set dancing behind lips all aflutter. In those unutterable places with specifically unknown locations, I have listened, Through rock and metal, Between those landlocked towns and those salt clad harbors, For the full sound escaped from your trembled lips. And I have listened, through daydreaming mist veils, And through known and unknown places, For that voice that speaks through space and time and rock and metal, And I have only heard that curious sound of human and inhuman calls, And I have heard those particular siren calls of those specific siren girls, And that cry of human voices that shriek and drown.
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Jan 17, 2013
Jan 17, 2013 at 11:00 PM UTC
Songs for Sirens I
I have waited in certain landlocked towns, Near and far, and far from here. And I have sailed and been in low ports found, Their inlets clad in salted air. And I have dreamed on oft spoken of starry nights and on largely unspoken starless nights, Of select places with opportune and tactless new found faces. And I have lain out restless and uncomfortably awake, Hearing human voices shriek and drown, In salt clad harbor towns, And heard those specific siren calls of those particular siren girls, In those inlets, salt clad by the sea. And still awake I have heard, in those waiting-space landlocked towns, Curiously, those curious sounds, Of only human and yet inhumane calls. Dressed in that specific gauze of an agony-tone, For that specific landlocked home, Where drinkers go, That drunkard’s throne, And been sullen at that once and forever shoreless drone. And I have also been, you see, in places left unknown. And in a daydream I would hear and be heard by almost gasping voices, From waking and still somehow sleeping and unbelieving men. Grasping out onto air that has been made thin and further, Been gasping. Searching for woefully inaccurate words, With a woefully inarticulate tongue, And I have danced and been set atremble by the timbre of your breathe And then enamored by the resonance of your gasp, And I have gasped with a tongue set dancing behind lips all aflutter. In those unutterable places with specifically unknown locations, I have listened, Through rock and metal, Between those landlocked towns and those salt clad harbors, For the full sound escaped from your trembled lips. And I have listened, through daydreaming mist veils, And through known and unknown places, For that voice that speaks through space and time and rock and metal, And I have only heard that curious sound of human and inhuman calls, And I have heard those particular siren calls of those specific siren girls, And that cry of human voices that shriek and drown.
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"Sweet, thou art young." "So He was young Who for my sake in silence hung Upon the Cross with Passion wrung." "Look, thou art fair." "He was more fair Than men, Who deign'd for me to wear A visage marr'd beyond compare." "And thou hast riches." "Daily bread: All else is His: Who, living, dead, For me lack'd where to lay His Head." "And life is sweet." "It was not so To Him, Whose Cup did overflow With mine unutterable woe."
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The Three Enemies: 02 - The World
An extension from my lips: a plead, so desperate. Don't go, don't stay: stay somewhere faraway. A trembling voice in the depth of where silence resides, The fear of solitude, of what's left inside. A scream unheard, unutterable, A plead so desperate, so feeble. Submission to the newest of moons, Rotation of deeds, so fast, so soon. Bloodshed or teardrops, comfort or lies: So hard to remember, so hard to decide, Oh, the fear of solitude, of what's left inside. Because what's unutterable will be uttered someday, The music which alone will be faced.
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May 27, 2013
May 27, 2013 at 7:52 AM UTC
Unutterable.
From within The Spy's enfolding spire, There emits a glint of fragile light, Revealing an unreachable, mist-fading city— The vivid incantation of unutterable occult rites. Before the riptide of the shore, Illumed by the light of his flickering flame, The Spy collapses into his spire, Only to emerge once again: Now past the water's glistening edge, Having scaled the city's sky-flung walls. Now moving between ancient shadows, Following the light of his vermilion flame. Now seeking catacomb chambers Where, among dismantled skeletal bones, The master of the slumbering dead resides.
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Jan 9, 2023
Jan 9, 2023 at 8:39 PM UTC
The Spy
Home is where the heart is right? Funny thing is, my heart grew legs and walked right out with you. I have no home. I didn't have a choice I didn't request that it leave with you but it did and now I feel empty. Emptier than I should feel, its only a heart right? Only a muscle cramped up inside my chest? Wrong. Its you. I lost you. You weren't my Romeo, you are my Catherine and like Heathcliff, the pain of being without you is unutterable. You have left me in this abyss, and I'm reaching for you but you're not there to walk into my arms. I cannot find you. Whether you chose it or not you grew onto my soul and became a part of me, you are my Adam, you form a part of the ribs that encase my lungs. Its getting harder to breathe, I feel like my lungs are collapsing under some kind of imaginary weight. The weight of you
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Nov 21, 2013
Nov 21, 2013 at 12:41 PM UTC
Homeless
Insufferable comfort Ungovernable love Vulnerable heart Unutterable desire Unspoken need.
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Jul 15, 2014
Jul 15, 2014 at 7:08 PM UTC
Together (10W)
Dealing with OCD is like losing your mind, You can be in a room full of people, yet all alone, Noone can ever know when the horrible thoughts will come and what they will be you just feel a buzz, a hum, a drone in your head and you try to block it out but like Sony Xperia apps running in the background, they are there, infernal consuming the bandwidth of your soul there is a fine line between delusion and sanity a clutching at straws, a search for help pleas and pleas fall not on deaf ears but endure it you must until it runs its course tunnelling on, pushing you to the edge straddling the fine line buoying bobbing, dancing, fleeting- drowning you in its wake as you gasp and gasp OCD is horrible and misunderstood why it hit me, I know not- when it came part of me, I never agreed I just woke up arrested, paralysed by the most unutterable thoughts... I suspect it happened when I met the thin woman with the one eye- I have known no peace since then Paranormal paranoia rules my brain and I am mooted, glued in the vile filth of guilt, shame, anger, helplessness- like a generator running on fuel, incessant the tyres do not stop burning alone, sometimes, I ask myself why? why me Lord? the cup is too heavy for me to bear and ghouls have made my mind an open playing field and I cant break free at times I wake up and its gone I smile and dress up- try to think normally, eat and sleep but itchy insomnia rages on my skin beads of sweat and shaking, my mouth is dry I am afraid, frightened and I cower OCD is crunching my life, slowly and sadly noone knows...they just dont know why I say 'off' things sometimes they suppose its the preoccupation of a busy mind, and busy I am wallowing, silently, stewing in the prison it seems there is no escaping this
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Sep 17, 2014
Sep 17, 2014 at 1:55 AM UTC
O.C.D
Dealing with OCD is like losing your mind, You can be in a room full of people, yet all alone, Noone can ever know when the horrible thoughts will come and what they will be you just feel a buzz, a hum, a drone in your head and you try to block it out but like Sony Xperia apps running in the background, they are there, infernal consuming the bandwidth of your soul there is a fine line between delusion and sanity a clutching at straws, a search for help pleas and pleas fall not on deaf ears but endure it you must until it runs its course tunnelling on, pushing you to the edge straddling the fine line buoying bobbing, dancing, fleeting- drowning you in its wake as you gasp and gasp OCD is horrible and misunderstood why it hit me, I know not- when it came part of me, I never agreed I just woke up arrested, paralysed by the most unutterable thoughts... I suspect it happened when I met the thin woman with the one eye- I have known no peace since then Paranormal paranoia rules my brain and I am mooted, glued in the vile filth of guilt, shame, anger, helplessness- like a generator running on fuel, incessant the tyres do not stop burning alone, sometimes, I ask myself why? why me Lord? the cup is too heavy for me to bear and ghouls have made my mind an open playing field and I cant break free at times I wake up and its gone I smile and dress up- try to think normally, eat and sleep but itchy insomnia rages on my skin beads of sweat and shaking, my mouth is dry I am afraid, frightened and I cower OCD is crunching my life, slowly and sadly noone knows...they just dont know why I say 'off' things sometimes they suppose its the preoccupation of a busy mind, and busy I am wallowing, silently, stewing in the prison it seems there is no escaping this
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