"booger" poems
freckly nose and wrinkly toes (from bath water)
sway, "hey it's good to see you again, how long are you in town?"
"three days,"
even if we don't spend every minute together
just a night of locked hips is enough for me
my belly is soft
you grab my waist in the donut shop
you have an eye ****** but i don't tell you
Aug 17, 2015
Aug 17, 2015 at 1:16 PM UTC
Flossing more often because of you
Kool-aid blue cold condensation
Wiping my brow drifting dreaming
Biting my bottom lip until bruised
Fantasies of you being used
Objectified with warm honey eyes
My popsicle melted on your lips
Elbows dug into my mattress
Give me some sugar, ******
My pixie stick sweetheart
Indulging my sweet tooth
Flossing more often because of you
Jun 7, 2021
Jun 7, 2021 at 12:17 AM UTC
Drug Addict
I drink beer, I drink liquor,
doing shots makes it quicker.
I smoke a bowl, I smoke a joint,
is there a problem, get to the point.
I take acid, I like trip,
I love the trail of a moving whip.
I like ****** sugar, I snort coke,
no wonder, I'm so **** broke.
I pop pills for stress, some for pain,
you'll never hear me complain.
I shoot ****** then I dose off,
my life is just a total loss.
I make and smoke ****
hoping it takes my last breath.
Special K is my favorite tranquilizer,
I use it as a drug appetizer.
I smoke crack, don't ask why,
don't knock it, til you try.
Ecstasy makes me feel so good,
it always puts me in a special mood.
I sniff gas, I sniff glue,
then I ask, who are you.
Sometimes I smoke hash,
I live a life of white trash.
Morphine can't be beat,
my brain has suffered a defeat.
I even take ****** and steroids,
***** big, ***** small and I'm paranoid.
Been to counselling, been to rehab,
last time I went, I ended up with *****
Now finally, I'm clean and sober,
been that way since mid October.
I admit drugs are more fun,
but in the end, God finally won.
Jan 11, 2014
Jan 11, 2014 at 2:56 PM UTC
****** Off
I'm feeling rather foul today,
so I ask you to ****** off,
it's not pretty when I get this way,
you just need to ****** off,
please don't get in my face I pray,
you need to just ****** off,
my head gets hard and my heart turns to clay,
it's best if you ****** off,
I'm asking you to please stay away,
why can't you just ****** off,
not sure if I'm sad, but certainly not gay,
won't you please just ****** off,
maybe I need a good roll in the hay,
naw, just won't you please ****** off,
just got crap on my shirt, from a flying Blue Jay,
gotta go inside and get that ****** off,
that's the way it's been going for me this whole GD day,
why won't the world just leave, ****** off,
no blue skies here, just cloudy and gray,
is it a sign for me, to just ****** off,
no, tomorrow will change, at least that's what I say,
then you flip me the bird, and yell ****** off,
now I'm back where I was, I'll hide until May,
no one to tell me, hey ****** off,
like my love who has spurned me, turned me away,
she said it was too much, I must ****** off,
maybe worms for lunch, with a glass of OJ,
then I can do my own ****** off
Gomer LePoet...
Apr 9, 2010
Apr 9, 2010 at 5:48 AM UTC
Casually caressing
the comedy of life
A child knows not
tragedy’s strife.
There is always another dream
toy or friend
for their fetal-esteem.
They spell their grammar
with candy and curiosity
while maintaining a history
in smile and laughter.
The heroism of Joe
the G.I.
and the beauty of a Barbie
are created impulsively and
fueled by imagination and apple juice.
A bike is not
a means of transportation
but rather
meant to be raced and jumped.
Scooby-Doo
and the ****** Tunes should
rule Saturday mornings
from their throne in the tube.
Monkey bars and playgrounds,
are not merely a facility
to upkeep physical activity.
Instead
it is a kingdom of escape
engineered by make-believe
funded by risk-taking
and motivated by the
eradication of the cootie-plagued
and ****** pickers.
Where did time go,
when these bones grew old
this brain grew dull
and these hands lost their callus?
The world is cruel
for the elder mind.
Yet, for our youthful kin,
Society does not exist
in coloring books
and world peace is only found
in imagination and apple juice.
Jan 11, 2013
Jan 11, 2013 at 2:02 AM UTC
Have you ever had a ****** stuck inside your nose?
You blow so hard, you get pain down in your toes.
You try your best, and you try with all your might.
It refuses to come out, all of the day and night.
The ****** has made a home, in your head it seems.
You blow some more, and even try some creams.
No matter what you do, the thing will not come out.
You pull your hair, then scream and shout.
How desperate you become, to try something new.
But what on Earth, could you possibly do?
Maybe if you stuck your finger in? No, that would be insane.
Or stick your head upside down, out in the freezing rain?
You have tried creams and gels, and a Q tip or two.
But nothing is working, and nothing will do.
And then one day, without even a thought.
You sniff real hard, and BEHOLD something caught!
Down the back of your nose, and into your throat it will ride.
Now it's in your stomach, where it can happily hide.
But you swallowed it! That's really, really gross!
Do you even care though, as long as it's out of your nose?
Nov 11, 2010
Nov 11, 2010 at 1:18 PM UTC
The best part of waking up
is picking my nose
and rolling all my gooey boogers up
into one big ball,
an amalgamation of snot and crust,
then flicking it off
and trying to get it to stick
up on that one spot on the ceiling.
Y'know, that one slightly darkened spot
just above my *** stained desk
downstairs in the back room?
It's down there next to all those
empty Jim Beam bottles, well
I mean they're not empty anymore
because I keep filling them up with ****
But they used to be empty at one point,
actually I guess they've been empty twice;
once before the factory added the liquor
and then again after I drank all the liquor
but before I added the ****
I digress,
you get it.
The ****** spot on the ceiling.
Good morning. 🌞
Jun 25, 2025
Jun 25, 2025 at 8:05 AM UTC
****** Off
I'm feeling rather foul today,
so I ask you to ****** off,
it's not pretty when I get this way,
you just need to ****** off,
please don't get in my face I pray,
you need to just ****** off,
my head gets hard and my heart turns to clay,
it's best if you ****** off,
I'm asking you to please stay away,
why can't you just ****** off,
not sure if I'm sad, but certainly not gay,
won't you please just ****** off,
maybe I need a good roll in the hay,
naw, just won't you please ****** off,
just got crap on my shirt, from a flying Blue Jay,
gotta go inside and get that ****** off,
that's the way it's been going for me this whole GD day,
why won't the world just leave, ****** off,
no blue skies here, just cloudy and gray,
is it a sign for me, to just ****** off,
no, tomorrow will change, at least that's what I say,
then you flip me the bird, and yell ****** off,
now I'm back where I was, I'll hide until May,
no one to tell me, hey ****** off,
like my love who has spurned me, turned me away,
she said it was too much, I must ****** off,
maybe worms for lunch, with a glass of OJ,
then I can do my own ****** off
Gomer LePoet...
Oct 2, 2013
Oct 2, 2013 at 9:23 AM UTC
Rile, you of the critic poets,
at this disregard, which mocks
your sense of propriety
regarding entitlement.
Even you, few stuck-up poets,
must feel the edge of your lip
twitch, turning sharp corners round,
leaning to spy grotesque calm.
Nose through as you would, higher poets,
you shall find no garbage here,
within what space you can sniff.
You snotty few can't complain.
Sep 13, 2014
Sep 13, 2014 at 1:31 PM UTC
See, see the tiny sky
Marvel at its big puce depths.
Tell me, Tony do you
Wonder why the armadillo ignores you?
Why its foobly stare
makes you feel churned.
I can tell you, it is
Worried by your giffengididdle ****** growth
That looks like
A mold.
What's more, it knows
Your pantsy potting shed
Smells of ******
Everything under the big tiny sky
Asks why, why do you even bother?
You only charm garlics.
Dec 22, 2013
Dec 22, 2013 at 6:05 AM UTC
Someday, when you're sick
and feeling especially perverse
you should blow your thick nose
without a tissue
and just watch it all come out.
And maybe,
if you're in the right mood
you'll experience that perfect, beautiful
disgust
and you'll wonder
just why we invented tissues at all.
Jan 24, 2013
Jan 24, 2013 at 4:35 PM UTC
Green chain fence on either side
Concrete path for bikes to glide
Rapids churning far below
****** Bridge is were we'd go
Spray can pictures on its span
'Ozzy' spelt in mangled plaid
'Iron Maiden' painted red
To ****** Bridge and then to bed
Tired laughing, crying fits
Flashing censored body bits
Gladiator crayfish fights
****** Bridge on summer nights
On this bridge all kids would go
To feel the sun and swim below
Now it stands all alone
To ****** Bridge I'll always know
Jun 23, 2016
Jun 23, 2016 at 12:21 AM UTC
a harp has been strummed
a banjo picked
a heart has been numbed
a ****** flicked
a page has been thumbed
a sharp ice pick
a mouth has been gummed
a desiduous tick
a cigarette has been bummed
a virginal stick
a town has been slummed
a slippery ****
a ***** has been ******
a little *****
a lonely man jumped
a fall and a click
a crowd has been pumped
a comedy shtick
a mind has been stumped
a clever trick
Oct 5, 2011
Oct 5, 2011 at 2:50 PM UTC
My brain is tied
to a string on
your finger
I know you know
to pull the string
on your finger
All of my heart
is at your
disposal
Move my skin
because it feels good
Your touch is all of me
Mar 22, 2013
Mar 22, 2013 at 4:06 PM UTC
It's all about timing.
Say it. Don't spray it.
Raise one finger to your nose.
Flick a ******
Wait! No! That's not it.
Start over.
Try Again.
There is someone out there for you.
Jun 20, 2012
Jun 20, 2012 at 6:38 PM UTC
Enter softly, she spoke to me, twisted like fungi on a tree trunk. For every spot of desert there's an ounce of ocean to fit inside it. Our tunnels will meet someday I told her. Do not be afraid reading this, doom can be sweet as a garden or smelly like an eye ******
My abdomen is creased with age and tourniquets. Every time...I tie myself to a lamp post and wait for my Master to come with the next direction. I eat sugar cubes, carrots, and stand eight feet- so dive with me. I am a Pisces. I have been built to swim and suffer intolerable cruelties. Break me with your hand, your closed fist, a strap of leather, a bagful of flour. I am not the valor of your toothbrush or table cloth. I do not follow the sunset home, instead I fly over the bayou, scouting for sandpipers in the low tide.
Looking at the telephone for you to appear, playing the songs of you in my head. I hear you, I remember the airports, the MCA, the head holding, and the longing. In place of reality, I choose your colors boldly and stuff them tightly into my left lapel and chest breast pocket. You are superior evidence that I exist.
Mar 14, 2014
Mar 14, 2014 at 5:27 AM UTC
He was big and fat.
He was black and white.
He was the best cat ever.
He loved to snuggle with you.
Even if he didn't know you.
He loved being brushed.
He was so cute and cuddly.
I loved My little kitty.
But he is now in kitty heaven.
Oct 8, 2014
Oct 8, 2014 at 2:34 PM UTC
I've felt it down deep inside.
For how long I just don't know.
It clogs up natural function.
Drives me to seek it out, to show.
To dig.
To pillage.
To plunder.
From the onset of the morning sky.
I lie and I wonder.
A vibrant mass of warm air
Becomes overshadowed
By a green devil of no affair de coeur.
Of salty and putrid flair. Pure evil I'm sure.
I blow and blow but away it does not go.
Fighting and scratching and snorting and spitting.
Plucking and pulling and pressing and fitting.
Oh here it comes, such a wonderful feeling.
Yea tis truly sweeter than sugar.
Guess it wasn't some existential, angsty feelings from a relationship gone sour.
Nope, just a ******
Oct 28, 2012
Oct 28, 2012 at 8:40 PM UTC
Boogers are the best
Out of all the tasty treats
I love the way my fingers feel
Digging deep into the meat
Out of all that I stick in my mouth
Boogers are my all time favorite thing
Nothing's more satisfying
Than a good ****** to eat
**************************************
After it is I posted this
I see I should have proof read
As it's staring back at me
I'm more than a bit embarrassed
Burgers "NOT" boogers
Is what it should have said
Once again I have to blame
That with a mind of its own...spell check
Aug 1, 2015
Aug 1, 2015 at 11:56 AM UTC
One of the best things in life
is being is a super loud and busy coffee shop.
You can hum the song stuck in your head at a moderate volume
without looking like a ******
who hums moderately loudly
in public place.
One of the worst things in life
is having a serious conversation with someone you respect
and discovering they have a quite visible ****** in their nose.
Do you let them know about it?
Awkward.
Jan 14, 2012
Jan 14, 2012 at 2:27 PM UTC
A bar of soap wrapped with candy and sugar?
Or an emerald diamond hidden in a nasty ******
Can we truly see, or can we just look?
A marvellous story written on the pages of an old dusty book
A short chubby girl with guts and nerves
While she has long legs and perfect curves
Her blue eyes and long blonde hair cause obsessions
but her eyes are sore and she lost her hair during the countless chemo sessions
She steals their hearts, and gets what she prefers
While she prays the nights as cancer steals her's
Now did you find this a bit confusing?
Because the chubby girl maybe outside cruising
While she prays
Counting her last days
Which one is which?
Did they just switch?
Or did you switch them?
You forgot about the rose petals because you were too busy gripping the stem.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but what if the beholder is blind?
The more we search inside, the more beauty we'll find.
And as for the two girls, it is not our job to know
because we cannot judge what does not show.
Jul 25, 2014
Jul 25, 2014 at 10:16 PM UTC
my mother brings out the rawest form of me
I brush my hair in a soapy tub
we talk about *** , i'm on the verge of tears most the time
about not respecting yourself
being born with the consciousness of 7 dimensions
respecting yourself
some of my words come out in paradoxes that have yet to be resolved
i tell her how my aim is to **** in his mouth one day
she tells me i'm disgusting and we laugh at the ****** hanging up my nose
I brush my hair in a soapy tub
It's 30 degrees outside
We have to turn on the air con
occasionally there is applause
as we talk
about how the best way to make a contribution to this planet is to be yourself , she says she hopes she offered me that wisdom as a child
I brush my hair in a soapy tub
and say that it was mixed - be yourself but then smack ! Don't do that thing. It was confusing.
She says she wasn't conscious , she was confused
she couldn't do it now
like i don't eat meat
certain things fall away when you respect yourself.
My mother brings out the rawest form of me
I brush my hair in a soapy tub
Nov 17, 2014
Nov 17, 2014 at 5:49 AM UTC
I don't give a ****
The **** doesn't give a smell
The smell doesn't give a cloud
The cloud doesn't give a raindrop
The raindrop doesn't give a splash
The splash doesn't give a ripple
The ripple doesn't give a shiver
The shiver doesn't give a cold
The cold doesn't give a sneeze
The sneeze doesn't give a snot
The snot doesn't give a ******
The ****** doesn't give a dirt
The dirt doesn't give a bacteria
The bacteria doesn't give a rod
The rod doesn't give a fish
The fish doesn't give a fin
The fin doesn't give an end
The end doesn't give a death
The death doesn't give a grave
The grave doesn't give a flower
The flower doesn't give a root
The root doesn't give a plant
The plant doesn't give a strawberry
The strawberry doesn't give a seed
The seed doesn't give a sprout
The sprout doesn't give a leaf
The leaf doesn't give a stem
The stem doesn't give a bud
The bud doesn't give a flower
The flower doesn't give a petal
The petal doesn't give a pollen
The pollen doesn't give a nectar
The nectar doesn't give a honey
The honey doesn't give a sugar
The sugar doesn't give a grain
The grain doesn't give a flour
The flour doesn't a bread
The bread doesn't give a toast
The vein doesn't give a blood
The blood doesn't give a heart
The heart doesn't give me up
And I already told you,
I still don't give a **** about it!
Oct 16, 2017
Oct 16, 2017 at 5:59 PM UTC