No weakness tonight -
I tremble and ache
and doubt has colonized my veins...
But loneliness and heartbreak
will not be my bed mates.
I will sleep with dry eyes,
knees far from my chest.
Tonight I will rest.
Tonight I went on a date
with the moon.
I told her about you.
I started to say that
you shine like she does
but before I finished the thought
I knew I was wrong.
I will not write a line
saying you are my moon.
But for you, I burn,
And when I'm with you
I am full.
And when you're gone
the moon is full.
"There is no time for weakness,"
she tells me,
"Be full."

do you remember capital letters?
the upper case that i seldom use?
remember how i used to use them?
if you scroll through my poems you will see that i did.
but then you happened.
you didn't steal them from me
but capital letters indicate strength
and because of you
i am weak.

I
Must say
You're best
At how you beat me
With the very bit of mine imagination


For
A second
You make me
Want to think,I'm the greatest amongst your enemies
Yet
When I
Grasp you in mine arms
And proximate you on me
Shall you quiver yet not so long
And shall gasp to kiss on my lips


Truthfully
Now and then
Shall your sighs puzzle me
And for every bit voiced
Cram how you had want to gulp me
whole inside of you
And even how you can't live without me

Yet
I'm cloack
With remorse
For I feel I make you a bully of my love
And
Each now and then
Will  I listen to the words
You say and purge their fairness
To the very syllable

I
Had
Believed you whole
And mine eyes shall flood with tears forever
When I heard you say
He always make you ebb through
The beautiful blues skies and make you want
To catch the golden sunset
When you two make love
I
Had
Even believed
You thoroughly
And had sink into wild waters
Or probably drown into the deepest part
Of the abyss
And rest myself there
For an eternal self-torture
When
I heard you say
His touches make your heart beats faster
Than the rhythms of love played by a ghost
On a magic lyre

But
Then
Every word you uttered
Was a false figurine in your eyes
And
Again
By and by shall I peek the verity
They cloack your soul with
Like what they say
"The window to every soul is the eyes"

But
I may
Had Believe the very words
Your  tongue chimed
Yet then
I trust wholly in the verity your eyes spoke

The verity your eyes speak

©Historian E.Lexano

It isn't for fun and games anymore.
That excuse wilted away.
In fact them are my very downfall.
Back then, **** was only a refreshment
And chosen were the days on it.
I was on guard and after
each introduction
Every reabsorbed indulgence
I walked it out of calling range
Chose not to be what I am now.
Financially funneling my nonexistent,
To make my way through **** work
**** pay, always broke...
Weak without; Penniless with it.
I need out.  Have little lapses.
I am not going to be a great loss.
Just one that couldn't let go
As fast as those that dabbled back then.

You know,  I've never seen you cry

I don't cry

Everyone cries

I don't

I cry all the time

Mmh

You must cry sometimes

*No

Why
    *does
         people
             always
                 feel
                    weak
                        and
                           vulnerable
                              before
                                 *bedtime?

Everyday I wake with a pain,
Forever in my chest, it will rein
The feeling so cold, it freezes my soul
A payment I must give, a living toll

I have never felt so alone
In those few seconds that are known
So many before me have lived this lie
That life is some mysterious high

But for the rest, each day is a test
To see who will overcome being suppressed
Living a life of lies and deceit
Trying to be accepted, but becoming effete

Some people that have lost all hope become weak
Giving in to the decision to perish, they die in defeat
Those critical seconds of choice
One of the few moments when some have a voice

They could decide to just give up and die
Or to choose to continue prospering and fly
Or curl in a ball of loneliness and sorrow
Questioning their life and hating tomorrow

I wish I were saved from this life changing decision
So I know there is some sort of provision
Stopping me from losing hope and ending it all
I want to die when the time is right, a willing fall.