They keep trying to knock me down.
But I'm a warrior.
I'm stronger then they all think.
Their blows hurt & knock me down.
Sometimes I can only crawl but I keep moving forward & get right back up.
This time I know my strengths & weaknesses.
I'm determined.
I come prepared for battle.
I wear the helmet of love, the shield of compassion, the sword of connection & the belt of truth.
I breathe in determination & exhale all the lies.
This time I know my worth & my truth.
You may not understand my story or experience
But this time I sure as hell won't let you captivate me into a cage... nope.
Last time I allowed others to hold a key to my heart.
Now I know better.
I'm best friends with that little girl within me.
I'm gentle & loving with her.
I protect her and show her she has everything she needs right within her.
Though the storms try to drown us, we will prevail.
People used to be the storms in my life that knocked me down & threw me around.
Now I am the Storm.
My anger is the thunder & lightening.
The rain is my tears that water my soul.
I also shine sunshine, lots of it.
The mixture creates a rainbow.
A rainbow which that little girl within me runs around & dances in the rain.
This time the choice is mine.
I am warm and sunny but be afraid of my wrath.
For this time I know my battle is not against myself.

Forward march, my intelligent young friend
Though your fight be neither fair nor just
Know you shall emerge God’s victor
Simply because you suffered
For what you knew to be right
The decks were stacked against your logic
Many upon many centuries ago
But mayhap now stand a possibility,
Just the tiniest portion of a feeble odd,
May be shaking towards favor
That this day may dawn your chance

I know you to be so very, very brave
I’ve seen not a stronger man yet
But not everyone has eyes of clarity
As you have opened my mind
Retain your noble mind
Hold your sweet mentality dear
You’ll not have it too much longer
If you let yourself fall prey to their fear
Keep your head high and be quite sure
To keep it together and collected to one
Let the pieces make a united front
And work like parts of a machine
No other way can allow
You to gain what justice and fairness seek

Remember always as well
That you fight not for yourself
But for me and for us and for your own child
Who you will love with all you have, just as I have you
Who you shall raise the very best you can, just as I have you
You fight for the future, allow for generations on their way
You fight for the past, avenge generations died in injustice
You fight for the present, for girls everywhere struggling with you
You are a united front, my grandmother and your child alike
Though many years and laws so cruel keep you down
You are our past, present, future and you fight as one

They will keep you down
Remove you from their way
Every second they can
They won’t miss a shot
To fire you down to your place
That’s why it’s your job,
Why it’s your fight to make a new one
Carve out your rightful standing
I know you can do it
You must keep that faith
And harbor it always in your soul
You won’t stand a chance if you let it go
And you must win this fight
My time is up, I’m nearly gone
It’s plain to see, you know it
I can fight with you no longer
Each step here on out you take alone
But remember I am with you:
My soul is tied to yours
My memory lives on within you
My cause and yours are one
And this cause, dear, is important
You must fight til the end
You must win at least part of your fight
So now I say to you as your loving mother
And I tell you, my loving daughter:
Win rights for all women,
Here and across the globe,
Dead, living, and unborn
From one soldier to another, I say to you
Keep up the fight
Until freedom rings for all
From sea to shining sea.

The darker the night
The stronger my sight
A sense of agony and delight
As the packs gather to fight
The king of another tribe
Rebels of felony, decide to bribe
I belong to my own kind
No tribe, no rebels, I am the king of my mind
A warrior once, never defeated
In any challenge or fight unbeated
The love of my life, my soul, my pride
Betrayed me and my clan to become the rebels bride
Known to many by my name, Baygoon
Often insight amongst the shadows of the moon
A fighter, a warrior, a man of loyalty
No king, no tribe, I bow to no royalty
Deep in the darkest forest, where the ancient ruins fall
I live among the trees, to help those who call
The ruins peak, looks like a primitive pyramid of a kind
A legend holds behind its closed eyes, for me to find
A promise to myself I've made to fulfill,
Till my last breath, my blood shall spill
When the death lord, happens to take me away
I'd welcome it like a warrior and descend from this body, that day...

©sim

You lost your right to be my father the moment you decided to sexually abuse me.
You don't even know the turmoil you have stirred up in my soul.
Do you sleep at night?
Because I don't, I lay awake in my confusion.
Wishing my reality was different.
You don't know what it's like to live with this.
If my own father couldn't love me, who will?
You took so ******* much from me.
You stole my innocence.
You made me feel tainted.
You made me fear trusting anyone.
Such deep rooted betrayal.
I finally understand I'm not the ******* up one.
You are.
I hope you get the help & support you need.
But right now I don't want you in my life.
I don't owe you anything.
You owe me a whole heck of a lot.
Starting out with an apology.
You weren't the father you should of been.
So you don't deserve the wonderful daughter I could be to you.
You know what I want?
I want your ******* lingering sensations gone from my body.
I want you out of my head.
I want you out of my nightmares.
I want you out of my heart, soul & mind.
You are like a pollution that keeps suffocating me.
I'm going to cleanse my soul from your toxins.
Your violence is inexcusable.
But my love over powers your violence.
Love is the answer.
I am loved.
I am worthy.
I am enough.
I will keep shining light on this darkness.

She's one of those beautiful mysterious ones.
The one that has absolutely no clue just how radiating she is.
Quiet but always thinking.
When she does speak her intelligence & eloquence flows out.
Kindness that melts your heart.
Her humor catches you by surprise.
That smile of hers fills the room with a force of enchantment.
I wish she could see what I see.
That she's not a **** among flowers.
But that she's a ******* beautiful rose bush.
Powerful with its twirling roots under ground.
Those thorns.. a force to be reckoned with.
She is like a closed rose bud hiding away.
But my God when she opens up and blooms.
You get blessed to see her for all the magnificent beauty that she is.
Full of color. A rarity.  
Like a galaxy full of shooting stars.
I wish she could see what I see.

I sat on the floor and stared at myself in the mirror. I could no longer ignore the pain behind those beautiful brown eyes. All the pain and confusion I'd run from for what felt like eternity; was now placed right in front me. I finally allowed the raw emotions to rush over me. It was fruitless to keep trying to fight against the waves. I let them crash all around & over me. It felt like it would drown me but the gentle pure spirit inside me told me I will be ok, it won't consume me. I looked in the mirror once again and what I saw now was a little girl. She looked really sad & confused. She had realized what was done to her was wrong & not how adults love children. She looked very scared and confused. "I'm sorry" I told her. I tried to protect you for as long as I could. But these dark secrets are killing us. We have to face it. The only way to cross over the ocean to the land of peace is to swim through it all. Don't worry, I got you, we're going to make it across. I'm not going to lie, it's going to be a long painful journey. She looked terrified upon realizing the betrayal that had been done to her, not knowing who she could now trust.. Her sweet innocence still flowed through her though, she ran into my arms & I held her as she wept & wept. I hugged her tight & cried with her. There aren't words to describe the pain we both felt. "You feel all wrong but you aren't." You're stronger than you know. You've been carrying someone else's shame for far too long. Time to unload all the junk. You're not a landfill; you are a beautiful garden. Cutting off the weeds on the ground never made them go away. We have to tend to the garden & pull out all the stuff that doesn't belong there from the roots. The little tiny soldier within me let out a long loud sigh, as if she had never exhaled before. I trembled & said "You're going to be ok, you're world isn't falling apart, it's actually falling into place. We will ride the waves together. It's time to shine light on that darkness. There's beauty & strength from this pain. We are survivors & warriors. Together with other warriors we will win this battle. We are not alone like we feel. Others have journeyed across before us and made it to shore. We will too. You're not alone.

Let your soul extend
Into mine
Never have I met a lady so fine
Pour your wine into mine
Give me that tinted shine
My stars aren't as bright
The sound of the comets keep me up at night
They're so far away
That's how I want it to stay
Like the peak period of the day
I want you be like that when you come my way
Bursting vivacious spirit
It's music if you try to hear it
If you grabbed lipstick and smeared it
I wouldn't change my tone
I wholeheartedly condone
You being yourself
With me, you could be on bookshelves
With your consent
Of course
Let's put the saddle on this horse
And pick off the gorse
In the fields
Yours would be goldfields
Close knit, organized
Unlike me
Messy and reckless
But you seem to ream me back together
That I appreciate the most
You have an issue
Lay it down
I'll take care of it
Nice guy in public
You start crying
I become a fierce warrior

They wield the button as a weapon of
their verse, throwing words like a glove.
But it was limp like there inconsistent verse,
like a lefty throwing, right handed but worse.

Your momentary time of the month, I gave
you an emoji tissue to wipe off the embarrassment
of sweaty words you opened up on now behave.
needing a little dignity, reverse on your disembarrassment.

Either that or been known for your CAPSLOCK stutter,
seeing you tripping over yourself amid ridiculed clutter.
now see that light on the side, click it speak respectably.
now calm your rage, and talk respect others expectedly.