Tequila kisses & ***** thoughts,
Hungover love shines through tired eyelids of mine
Drink, drank, drunk, on liquor, on each other.
Punch drunk love, is not real love.

I know you're my hangover love.

Hey you, yes you, with the razor in your hand and the tears in your eyes, I hope this has reached you in time

Don't drag that blade across your wrist, leg, hip or tummy

Hey you, yes you, with the  pills in your hand and death on your mind. I hope this has reached you in time

Don't swallow those pills. I actually care

Hey you, yes you, with the rope around your neck and ***** on your breath. I hope this has reached you in time

Don't jump don't hop just stop. Remove the rope climb off the chair, I care

hey you, yes you, with the horrid past and a bright future. I'm glad this reached you in time

Now you see that I care

on her wild nights,
she smells of
*****,
cigarettes,
and
delicious sweat.

I was drunk last night.
I made a sandwich at one in the morning
I hated the feeling of alcohol
Burning in my stomach,
But I was drunk last night,
I was alone.
I remembered how
I stood on the edge of the cliff,
I had no fear that time,
Because if I'd died, I wouldn't care.
The way my arm was torn and split,
So I could prove that I still feel,
I wasn't drunk then.
But I was drunk last night.
I wrote poetry about wristwatches
And watched music videos
Until I passed out in this bed.
I don't know why I did it.
But I feel sick today.

Baby I just wanna get drunk
A little something to get me outta this funk
Maybe get some smoke into these lungs
Laugh at terrible jokes and finger guns
Play some old records that I hate
While you tell me why they’re so great
Get freaked out at how fast time goes
I’ll fall asleep on the floor in my clothes
Just a chilled night, nothing crazy
I just wanna get drunk with you baby

12 | Heartbreak in Hatfield

I just wanted to create a few unforgettable memories.
Every night we mixed *****, love, ***, **** and Hennessy.
After all this time, I do not know why I am still longing for you.
Even after all the painful and senseless **** you put me through.
I turned my pain into poetry and I haven’t looked back ever since.
I wish you’d never ask about my love life because I could never love or be loved right.

After all this time, I do not know why I am still longing for you.
Even after all the painful and stressful **** you put me through.
I remember you from your beautiful brown eyes down to the empty promises you cursed me with.
I was a lost boy in my youth and I spent most of my precious time blowing smoke in my room.
I hope you have found a way to finally stop smoking cigarettes and drinking ***** like there’s a message in the bottle.
I hope you have finally found peace, love and happiness in this wonderful city called Pretoria.
Everyone in your life changed but I didn’t, I guess you were wrong about me.
It’s June now so while you find comfort in your complacency just know that I’ll be leaving soon.

9 | Heartbreak in Hatfield

Find me somewhere between old and cliché Tumblr poems and filtered Instagram pictures.
It was just yesterday when we were worlds apart when your ex-boyfriend broke your loving heart.
You eventually began smoking again and drank wine and ***** like there was a message in the bottle.
But I can’t judge you for all the things that you did because I was right there by your side comforting you.
I took an Uber from the CBD all the way to Hatfield just to find peace of mind and get some closure from you.
All this time I have been hoarding the memories we made like there is a black hole I’m trying to fill.
I wonder if I’ll ever be good enough in the eyes of the people who never appreciated my love.
Within your circle of friends someone knew that you were falling in love with someone new.
But you kept me waiting all this time just so you could let me down like gravity.
I should have realised this a long time ago that pain hurts more when you choose to ignore it.
If only it was so easy to let you go then I would’ve done that a long time ago.
I wanted you to fill my emptiness with requited love but I realised that you were a void too.

Tomorrow I turn eighteen.
I’ve been living my whole life hating the fact that I was born
And I could’ve sworn that I wasn’t gonna make it this far
I’ve done my fair share of harm
I’ve popped bars and I’ve let loose
I’ve downed my weight in ***** and juice
I feel as though I have tried it all,
I don’t have very far left to fall
I’m tired of the world making me feel so **** small
I think this might be my final call
Eighteen years have come and gone,
In a hell that went on for far too long
I don’t think this is where I belong,
And I don’t think I’ll be around to hear my birthday song

why do i like the pain
it's all the same
repeating nights
repeating days
repeating kisses
and repeating shame
feel no ways
***** bottles and a song by drake