I bought a mannequin for $65
it was used, just like you.
it has a stain on its chest
where our matching birthmarks lie
two skin toned islands, both yours.
I carried it home on a rainy evening,
like that wine buzzed night we shared,
baked it your favorite cake,
chocolate, dulce de leche, strawberry.
it was vegan, just for you.
I dressed it up in the clothes you left:
yoga pants, leopard print bralette, black scarf.
your parting gifts.
I'm sure it's cold,
I'll put the space heater on high,
like I always did for you.
it doesn't talk much, it just sits
eyes vacant, without breath,
empty.
like you were at the end.
a fine replacement.
it was used,
just like you.

A naked man stood in front of me.

He wasn't naked in the way I needed him to be.

I saw everything and I saw nothing.

I felt everything and I felt nothing.

I touched everything and I touched nothing.

We used protection but I was unprotected.

The bond of my mind and body neglected.

My body is satisfied while my mind is infected.

I tell myself "no more", lest I regret it.

You carved and shaped me to your liking
and then threw me away
when there was nothing left of me

You dined off my demons
My flaws are what kept you afloat
You sipped on wine
As you absorbed all of the blood
Out of my raw corpse
You left me
Unsteady, powerless
On the cold, hard ground
Without me
You would have
Perished...
As you move onto your next victim
I pray that you have an allergic reaction
To her blood

you can’t keep chewing me up and spitting me out until you get the flavor you want.

All your fears come true,
  you were just there in lieu.
A body to warm his bed,
  a soundboard to ease his head.
You always were a placeholder,
  again forced to grow colder.
Soon there will be nothing there,
  no words or love to show you care

I used to tell myself that I was never a pretty girl
I allowed someone's opinion clout my world
I doubted everything I could do
I allowed someone's thought influence me too
Only now:
I am confident wearing my flaws
From head to toe, I know I have it all
I know I'm not perfect but, I indeed have great skills
To all those before, you no longer have the power of my wills

I am too nice,
My strongest point makes me the weakest,
Regardless of my height, being too kind is where the peak ends
I don't mean by being respectful is where I've lost the fight
The scraps and bruises come from those beneath my mighty branches, those who keep taking chances
The one I constantly provide for, the one that see my bark as supplies, my shade as protection, my time as what I only provide

And I'm way too nice,
She knows all my secrets, how to pick at my wounds
How to get me to leak information, how to deepen past feuds
With more ammunition that I never planed for because I am not the type to protrude and push someone down when their lost or confused
See there's a big difference between helping someone who actually needs it,
And someone taking advantage of the help you give

It's hard to see the difference,
Like a misspelled word in the dictionary
Is that truth or fiction?
Is is reality or a depiction of what is being preconceived..
Those are thoughts I now think about as the text is being received
Her words and phone calls I can't tell why I feel so relieved
When I speak to her, even if I am being deceived.