I preached the name
that I made vain.
I lived against
what I spoke for.
Now every choice
leaves a biased blame
that questions my core.

How can I live
to know I was fake?
How can I speak
when I know it's too late?
I tended my thoughts
with my own escape,
and looked as the light
darkened in my dismay.

I loose my grip
to the hope i created.
It's a lost feeling
when I know it was
anticipated.

So in this state of knowing
I'm just a failure,
I need to accept
I need a savior.
Just too many times
I became my own
traitor.

Lord please,

lead my choices
to purify my stains.
So I won't just live
to walk in vain.

Forgive me world,
for my selfishness.
Forgive me Lord,
please direct my
selflessness.

All my hope is gone,
Demolished, obliterated, corrupted
Its not my fault, but your's
Its not my flaws or negativity
But your carelessness and selfishness
Because I,
No,
You made a mistake
I am stained and broken
I will take my anger out on everyone
I will make them cry
I will hear them scream
I will watch them corrupt themselves,
As did I.

I am justified.

My love is destructive, vile ,and bitter to the taste
It will drag you in and under.
It's sporadic and vicious, a damaging fate
Run, before I need you most.
My love is jealous, selfish, an unforgiving gate
It will resent all you do wrong.
It's needy and bloodthirsty, forcing your affection
To where Infatuation is all you can hope for
My love is a scary, passionate, unjustifiable thing that will break under  its own pressure
It was not nurtured, comforted, or taught to stand straight
It is an evil, inhumane, alien trait
Run, please, please, get away.

So long have I been filled with doubt,
Too afraid to let pour out.
But tonight, in the midst of the storm in my spirit,

I curse your name and all that you are.

Hollow and fake.
You're no "give" and all "take".
When you speak of your life,
I can feel my hair turning gray.
I despise what you are.
I loathe what you say.
But what disgusts me the most is what you do everyday.

Liar. Sham.
You were all along.
You'd cut your own arm off before admitting you're wrong.
Prideful. Ungrateful.
You reek of greed.
Unable to distinguish what you want from what you need.

Selfish. Vain.
Quick to point a finger.
But when you are selfish,
You're the last one to linger.

Continue your fascade. Maintain the charade.

Karma's almost here and you're in the way.

Love is beautiful
Love is inevitable
Love is power
Love is destruction
Love brings strength
Love allows weakness
Love is nothing if you're selfish.

Desperate limbs drape themselves in the exact same shade of undiluted greengreengreen that we've seen in stagnant pools and empty hearts. A tiny verdant forest of lichens and moss to mask the barren grey of a self inflicted winter. Fingers cast out towards the sky grow thin and wretched with the desperate, exhaustive need need need to ****** the light from the sky. Forgotten are the mouldering piles of discarded stars laying around its feet. I think of that girl as I pick up a damp leaf and carefully press it between love poems and silent reveries.

The crooked tooth was just a tooth
Which sat like a worn-down moth
It dreamed for a free-hug booth
Though it never managed to go on forth

The crooked tooth was just a tooth
Which waited like a crippled witch
And always wished for its tiptoe path
While it knew that was just myth

The crooked tooth was just a tooth
Yet it kept a daydream to breathe
And to have a sparkle bath
Drenched between life and death

The crooked tooth was just a tooth, though
Which cared only about its growth
And shall only be a single tooth
Which then stood still at the end of birth

The crooked tooth was just a tooth
And it stood alone among the row
Of skull preserved by merciful death
Unaware of the dreams it had dreamed

But,
Ah,
Yes,
Never mind that.

For the crooked tooth
Was just a tooth
A worn-down moth
A selfish tooth.

As we all have someone in our lifes we love or hate... vengeance is bittersweet. Id love to go bust down the door of her house. And not **** her, but her family... to hurt her soul, like shes done mine. Have her stand there alone with nothing left but emptiness... but I cant. It would destroy me,  take my "heaven". **** maybe hell wouldnt be so bad if I got in with the right people. But im scared. I love life and my biggest fear is death. For a man with nothing, I feel I have the most to lose... myself in bitter sweet nothingness...

Make poor decisions
like eating too much ice cream
after a long day

Be selfish
when things are going wrong
and you just need a nap

Put others down
in a different chart
so you do not compare your successes
to theirs

Be greedy
and want the best
for yourself