I want to be able to look at you and know
That I could have you
If I wanted to
when I wanted to
And no one else would be allowed to touch you
Because you  are  **mine

Live each day as though it were your last,
That's a good advice to take,
Too bad I'm still fixing up my past,
The miles I've got to go, all that's at stake.

Sound advice, a troubled life.

And your face, is it really you?
You see, I've met dozens in my
Life who seem legitimate friends,
But most of them all turn out the
Same, eccentric hating, self centered,
Abusive hypocrites and liars to the end.

Sound advice, a troubled life.

Why did I not take their advice?
I could make ends meet if I had a wife,
Don't know why I have to live in spite,
Did I ever say I wanted marriage in my life?*

Sound advice, a troubled life.

You say that you can't do it
I reply that I know why
I name the reasons that I assume
But you tell me something new

My heart shifts

Do you mean to say
That you're not going to try
Simply because it'd  be too hard?
Is that the only reason why?

Do you understand
How upset I can get?
How much I can cry?
"And it's hard for me to admit that,
As a man"

But I can cry

And maybe I wouldn't have to
Maybe I wouldn't quite so much
If you would just try

It's funny how you can be
So ******* heartless
So ******* dismissive
So ******* selfish

Without even trying
If you only knew
Why I was crying
When you said you love me

Maybe you don't know me

Maybe you love your daughter
Maybe you're losing her
Maybe you should just try
A little ******* harder
Next time.

We were having a good time
Or at least I was.
Then she said she lost her confidence
Not just one area
She said in every field
Even the fields she used to excel
And she thinks I am responsible
Some way or other I made her lose her confidence
Self-belief and self-worth.
I demean her all the time.
And it was there from a long time
She even had to consult her sister.
But she dare not talk with me
Am I that fearsome?
Did I not make her feel comfortable?
Everyone else could see it clearly happening in her
Except I who happens to her boyfriend
Unfortunately for her.
Do I need to change something?
Or is it something that can’t be fixed?
‘Cause it is just the way I am.
But I won’t be the reason of her downfall.
If it does not work, I will probably leave her for good.
I want her to flourish and live her dreams.
I can’t be selfish with her.

I Am A Selfish Lover
I love you in my own selfish ways.
Like other guys I don't claim to love you unconditionally.
I love you on a condition that you're going love me back.
I want you to be happy.
But I want you to be happy with me.
Yeah I'm overprotective sometime.
Sometimes "irrational" too.
But that has got a reason.
I can't lose you.
Because mere thoughts of spending the rest of my life without you
Gives me nightmares.

I'm a player, I'm the best.
I've played you, her and the rest.
That's what you thought.
I proved you wrong when I opened my chest.
You saw me with depth, an open heart.
You gave me yours.
It was open from the start.
A heart hurt too many times.
You told me you can't take another.
A heart held together with vines.
This was the tricky part.
The first time in my life.
I saw a future of treasure.
A glimpse of this lady, my wife.
I felt safe like I was where I needed to be.
I promised my self I'd do you no harm.
To cause you pain would be to cut off my own limb.
I've been waiting all my life to find someone worthy to commit my life to.
So I committed myself to you and you threw me away.
You told me honestly what you wanted and needed.
I gave it to you and more.
But you were after what you had before.
Cling to him with guilt.
Cling to him till you rott.
Cling to him lifelessly.
Cling to him lovelessly.
Cling to him endlessly.
Until one day it all falls apart.
You've proven untrustworthy.
You've proven betrayal.
You've proven sly words.
You've used tears to get your way.
You've promoted falses so fake.
Gemini construct you might break.
You've cheated.
Me, him and your self from happiness.

I've been writing.
I rarely ever stop.
These words are feelings that I had forgot.
Like ideas not recorded.
These poems I'll not be rewarded.

Thoughts of pain
Love and lust.
Take little comfort in me.
As I do not trust.

Myself I'm selfish.
Like you or the next.
Bleed out like this.
That will be the test.

I've gone round and round.
Felt the ups the downs.
But never guilty you've been found.

Take me a way from this.
Take me far into the abyss.
Where no mortal walks.
No demon flies.
We'll stay forever and attest the tides.

He thought about his goals all too often
Sometimes he drove right by them
He never seemed to know where he was
Except his dreams that always waited for him

Nothing mattered as long as he believed
He had faith that his desires were worthwhile
It was the life that he decided to live for himself
But he couldn’t decide if it was a foot or a mile

He finally realized accepting reality was life
Trying to impress strangers could never last
The people that he knew always felt left out
He won not by winning but by accepting his past

Ignoring his mistakes sustained him for years
Pretending to be different is easier than it seems
But he decided he measured with the wrong cup
Loving a woman was harder than chasing dreams

I want to be drugged. Not by any chemical or medicine. But, by a person. Like an addiction.
I want to be assured of them never leaving.
I want to be assured of them understanding.
I want to be assured of them never taking advantage of the fact that I would reciprocate.
I want them to believe me.
I want them to trust me.
Accept me. Still love me.
I want someone to be sad when I am gone for good. Like the kind of sad that could **** a person. That is what I want.
I want them to appreciate little things.
I want them to do stuff for me.
I want them to share everything with me. Everything.
I want them to be there when I need them.
I want to give them sweet kisses in places no one's but they've seen. I want them to argue with me. For as long as it's me they're fighting with.
I want to kiss them, hold them and cherish them.
I want them to be drunk and drugged on me.
Because somehow I end up doing the same.
I want to be selfish.
I want them to bump into me someday.
I want them to exist.
I want them to be mine.
I want them.
**- Aks, //All I Want.

i want to mix you
take a part from each
rock your genes
sculpt my own peach

a perfect fruit
a pretty pink
******* insides
my own peach kink

and then i'd taste you
your pinkish flesh
you'd fit my crave
no more, no less