He fell from heavens high
Back down to this miserable Earth
All in the interest of loving me.
He was a guardian
So pure of soul
But all I saw
Were his wings.
He promised to protect me
And kept his word
Treating me better than anyone had
In a very long time.
He lived a second time just for me
Always there to rescue his favorite broken soul.
He was the one
To drag me out of dark alleys
Take the bottle from my hands
Tell me who not to call back
Place a hand on my heart
Just when I thought I couldn't feel anything good anymore.
He danced with me to my favorite records
Taught me how to laugh again
Sang me to sleep
Offered the gentlest kiss
Without asking for anything more.
He pried me open
To see into my soul.
I found true desire
In staring at his wings.
As the days passed
Disenchantment crept back in.
Finally, I asked him
What it was like to fly.
He smiled at me
So beautifully otherworldly
And told me that
As long as I was there with him
He wouldn't dream of doing it again.
It was then that I asked him the million dollar question:
"If you don't want to fly again
Would you mind giving just one of your feathers to me?"
He stayed silent for a while
Considering
Before he reached out
And tore a single sparkling plume
From one lovely white wing.
He dropped it into my outstretched palm
Before meeting my gaze
With watering eyes.
"My love," he said.
"Never doubt that I am yours."
For a while
That one feather was all that I needed.
Alas, like all things
The passing of days
Dulled its shine.
A few nights later
I asked my angel for another
Sure he wouldn't mind.
"Please," I begged.
"Just one more."
He hesitated for only a moment
Before plucking out another.
With a smile
I took it from him
To join the previous one.
There was a sick thrill
In seeing them side-by-side
One for him
One for me.
Of course
Two wasn't good enough for long.
I plead to him on one of my hopeless nights
Dropping to my knees
Choking on tears.
"Please," I said once more.
"If you really love me, do this for me. Give me more of you."
His own eyes glistening
He ripped out a handful of glittering ivory
Shoving them into my hands.
I barely even heard his groan of agony
Over my own cries of anguish.
As my collection of feathers grew
Along with my longing for more
I hardly noticed my angel grow gaunt
Glowing skin going dull gray
Radiant smile fading away
Retreating into himself
As I stripped him
Of the badge that stated his purpose.
He gave and gave
And I took and took
Never offering anything back
Never worrying
Figuring that this --
Making me happy --
Was his job.
Not once did it occur to me
That every small sacrifice caused him so much pain
That I had changed him from a guardian angel
To a caged, flightless bird.
So I never pressed him.
Besides
How do you ask someone
If they're tearing themselves apart
To give you a piece of them?
I didn't expect it
When my angel fell into my arms
The light already leaving his beautiful eyes.
"I'm so sorry," he whispered.
"But I have to go now.
Please take care of yourself when I'm gone.
And, when you look at the feathers
Think of me."
The least I could do
Was hold him
As he faded away.
Now, I walk this miserable world alone
Two angel feathers
Hanging from my neck.
I stay away from dark alleys
Seek solace in the bottle
Screen every call
Clutch a hand to my chest
Wishing my heart would freeze back over.
I've put away the records I once loved
Muted my laugh
Let every tear dry on its own
Stay up all night
Blaming myself
Vowing to never let anyone kiss these selfish lips again.
Now, I fall to my knees
Pleading with the heavens
To let him come back to me
Save me again
Reclaim the things I took from him.
Oh, angel
Please don't do this for your next girl.