I see you
Staggering
Your breath smells like a bar

I rush to your side
You push me away
You don’t want help

Your wasted lips
Clumsily dumping words
“I’m fine... I’m good... I’m great...”
They slur
You stumble

I steady you gently
I sit you down
I gaze into your drooping eyes

“I know you’re in pain
But, my darling,
This’ll only make it worse
I see you
I see your suffering
You’re not alone
Don’t run from your grief
You’ll never outrun yourself
No matter how many
Memories you drown”

You stare me dead in the eyes

“I’m not running.

I’m just numbing the pain

Until it puts me in the grave.”


And then I fear
I’ve lost you,
My love.

Sometimes want to close my eyes
Let the blackness in
Surrender to peace of death
Allowing reaper to win

Sometimes want to lay my head down
In a permanent sleep
Lips will never part again to sing
Or make another peep

Sometimes darkness pulls me in
At 2am resting in bed
If I have not slept when the clock strikes four
Usually say "**** it" and stay up instead

And more reckless when I drive to work
Than can admit out loud
Remembering times before I was so ******* up
Sometimes I wish I still made my parents proud

Reckless Love-Cory Asbury

Before I spoke a word, You were singing over me
You have been so, so good to me
Before I took a breath, You breathed Your life in me
You have been so, so kind to me

Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God
Oh, it chases me down, fights 'til I'm found, leaves the ninety-nine
I couldn't earn it, and I don't deserve it, still, You give Yourself away
Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God, yeah

When I was Your foe, still Your love fought for me
You have been so, so good to me
When I felt no worth, You paid it all for me
You have been so, so kind to me

And oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God
Oh, it chases me down, fights 'til I'm found, leaves the ninety-nine
And I couldn't earn it, and I don't deserve it, still, You give Yourself away
Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God, yeah

There's no shadow You won't light up
Mountain You won't climb up
Coming after me

There's no wall You won't kick down
Lie You won't tear down
Coming after me

There's no shadow You won't light up
Mountain You won't climb up
Coming after me

There's no wall You won't kick down
Lie You won't tear down
Coming after me

There's no shadow You won't light up
Mountain You won't climb up
Coming after me

There's no wall You won't kick down
Lie You won't tear down
Coming after me

There's no shadow You won't light up
Mountain You won't climb up
Coming after me

There's no wall You won't kick down
Lie You won't tear down
Coming after me

Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God
Oh, it chases me down, fights 'til I'm found, leaves the ninety-nine
And I couldn't earn it, I don't deserve it, still, You give Yourself away
Oh, the overwhelming, never-ending, reckless love of God, yeah

You are my best mistake
and if I could go back in time
I’d still choose you.

All was wrong
but felt so right,

following you down,
struggling to lift you up.

I’d make the same mistake
all over again

over anything,
over anyone,

I'd always choose you.

(for loved ones lost over Tehran)

The sound of shovel against snow
in a distant Canadian town

Same here as there

Knee deep in the harsh clarity of
stark white,
thoughts turn to lost life
over Tehran

Same here as there.

Above us muted Moon
veiled in winter's cloak
and blind to our divisions,
wears a mournful glow

Same here as there.

Screaming in my ear the sound of a mother’s panicked cries clutching child
in those terrifying last moments
over Tehran

Same here as there.

The howl of a father’s anguish oceans away,
beloveds lost over Tehran,
Rings helpless

Same here as there.

another in despair,
with shaking voice
confesses his pain is as big as the sky his son loved to fly

Same here as there.

the sound of recklessness and
twisted minds in high places targeting nations, peoples and someone else's hero

Same here as there

the sound of innocent blood on ***** hands

Same here as there

the muzzling, the blame game, the smoke and mirrors

Same here as there

the agony of he who pulled the trigger

Same here as there

the tragic moment the mistake was made
  
Same here as there

Despair in light of truth

Same here as there

the wailing sounds of a nation grieving

THE SAME HERE AS THERE.

Dedicated to those aboard the tragic flight of Ukranian Airlines 752 -  and to their loved ones
January 2020.

Why would you smoke cigarettes
And only smoke a half ?

"Our cigarette butts leave tracks,
I threw it halfway
To let others know
I can control my habits."

Maybe the same way
You left me
Halfway our dreams and goals
Only to find out
I loved you reckless
While you left
With halfway love