I needed a heart and my kind mother gave me one, while caring me on her shoulders through the midnight light, telling me to be brave and that it will serve me well.

I believed with her heart resting in my chest I'll never feel pain, but the pain is there up to now burning grief and regret. I am questioning in tears “Is this pain born from love, or is this love born from pain?”

How can I know?
When I am the child that took Mother’s heart and departed for the promised land without looking back at the baskets of black grapes we picked in our vineyard before me leaving, Mother’s hands squeezing the grapes all alone making the red wine that was served with everyone, but me, at her funeral.
She did the impossible to protect me from grieving. Right now, I wish I can find something I could blame her for.

Mother,
you gave me your heart,
and it serves me well. I want you to know,
I never had so much pain,
and I never had so much patience.

You gave me your heart, and it serves me well.

Hope nowadays resembles the wind.

One second people have it,

And the next it’s gone like the wind.

When an obstacle greater than you presents itself and stares you down.

Don’t coward away and forget about hope.

Being obedient to retaining hope pays;

People who are obedient,
Who remain faithful,
Who hold onto hope without hesitation,

Will see obstacles,
No matter how great or small,
be conquered by the divine.

You see when an obstacle seems too big for you, or too complicated and the how just won’t present itself .. it’s because you’re not supposed to be fighting that battle.

It’s God’s battle.

Give him his FIGHT BACK!

He called and asked to have his fight back.

He wants you to return it.

Give it BACK,
Let go and Let God.

Everything happens in divine timing.

Don’t let your hope dissolve,

Don’t let hope escape from your grasp like the wind, instead hold onto it with both hands and stand witness to how OUR God will conquer the fight.

Because he is the king of kings,
There is no obstacle greater than him
And he will succeed.

If you like your fruit soft
and sweet
You need simply segment it
with patience.
However
if you prefer
the earlier bite of hurry
the bitter crunch of
'time is money'
then pick it early
because you know
we don't all have all the time
in the world
but we do have better things to do
with our time,
which as you know
is of the essence.

But if you like your fruit
soft and sweet,
then sit in the shade of the tree.
Sit at his pieced feet
and listen to his patience.

-Bad news.

Before my very own brown eyes,
My sweet beloved took her life.

With her elegant gold pistol,
She with haste, blew out her temple.

Ah me, i know not what to do,
My love, you cut my heart in two.

Everytime i stare at the mirror
Admiring my own image
You pop on my mind
Imagining magically a day
Will come that
The mirror will
not only reflect my image
But also your tall dark
Figure on the door.

I just can't seem to ever let
You go