Isn't it a funny feeling; guilt
And the things we feel it for

I'm not sure which is harder; being unloved
Or being taught love is what it isn't

But both leave you robbed

And angry.

"
It took me two decades to understand,
You never knew how;
Yours came with strings of compliance attached

And obligatory love is a **** poor excuse for it.

"
I left, I left
And still the guilt came;

That unwanted visitor who refuses to leave.

My puffed chest, full of (your) breath
Yet I Choke, yet I Suffocate.

Your hand in my hand, worlds entwined
Yet I Dream, yet I Fear.

Everything forgotten, in your embrace
Yet I Wander, yet I Fail.

Four meters destiny, clock tickling straight
Yet I Ignore, yet I Wait.

Everything's Dark, everything's great
Yet I see, yet I Bait.

I see It coming, I Run away
Yet It chases, yet It Wins.

Clutch my arm, and "me" above Fate
Oh my Darling, I Suffocate.

By the good grace of the gods, those who have dared to taint my face with a welt, shall receive divine punishment - and not by those who are deemed mighty high above or the denounced who dwell at a plane below mantle and core. But by me, solely me, without maledictions or the intangible, me. Smote by my might. I am not a dictator, nor a man filled with ill-intent, though my words will be carved upon stone and actions dignified in blood. For me to be assaulted in such a haphazardly manner. As a conclusion to you actions know that death is your prometheus, death to your people, death to your land, death to your cattle. My violence exceeds the confines of your cranium, in a similar fashion my anguish extends across the lands; it will agonisingly, crucifying in arduity, mundane if it has to chase and chastise you to the proverbial end of the world. So, to whatever omnipotence you pray to (or do not), it is futile, you will be reprimanded and dealt with promptly, death to all those you love, death to the vermin you shelter in your home by the vignette oil-lit-lamp and the capacious pillow you so pompously lay your head. -

death to you.

You and I are just ghosts,
can't influence any hosts
Its hard to accept as truth,
but its never like we knew.

We have to watch the rivers bleed red,
families each time as they continue to flee
I know it breaks your heart, mine too,
but we can't holler or touch, like hopeless fools

We have to watch or turn our eyes to when,
a father abuses his young child to undress,
or the mother smashing with no maternal protect,
In the end we can just shut our eyes and deflect.....

There is no letting go, our conscious has to flow,
its breaking your heart, its losing our glow,
but there's no escape from tragedy of life,
its causing you misery and I too feel the strife

We took the pills together but sadly still here,
at least we have each other during the fears,
but there's no escape from this hellish land
at least we can be buried in concrete lies.

The breeze, carries fallen new leaf,
so full of vibrantly green,
into the middle of this park,
and it will change to coldly crisp,

I felt your beats when I asked you,
the rhythm got faster so I knew,
your passion was like my own,
we were two roses fully grown.

Now, its been 25 years,
and I just have a question,
will you pierce my heart,
if I ask this of you.

I'm over it and lived past my average,
of my family's male heritage
We are normally dead by the age of forty two,
but I keep going and I don't wish to pursue,

Will you plunge that butcher's knife,
into my chest as I am ready,
I'm tired and over this forsaken life,
and I should already be dead.

And its not like our romance,
now has any chemistry.
You will be free of my burden,
I know is causing your hurt

Myths used to portray how
Eve possessed the original sin
Along with her overripe
Pain, passed down to all of kin
Confess, tell me now
Is this the reason why
Women get born with shame
Stamped on our skin, shame
Buried within, shame
Dragged for decades
Like that tree in Eden
This shame shall never die
Banished, barely forgiven
As soon as you leave
Your mother’s ribs
You are subjected to laws
Of your father’s rage
The world where men
Decides on who I am
Should have been
Left as a myth

Fallen winds are scheming, as the biting cold was teething –
and in season, you could never forget the warmth of love,
when you’ve had that first feeling. But as your eyes start
to look like home, they gave me a welcome by the mat
at your door – where every kiss you, felt sunk deep
into your pores.

The result of a heart, is keeping score of how many times
it broke apart – criminals do fall in love, as they were
the ones who stole your heart. Warm in their innocence
as they court you with a smile; but when that love faces
a trial, don’t we start to judge our place in this love?

Your lips in their warmish water, now boils the joy out
of my smile – I’m a bit steamed when you bring your ex
around.

But I must have loved you as a vowel; even when
you became my X, I still love the pieces of U. And I
sometimes think about you more than I should; for
when we still love someone who doesn’t love you
back, don't we wonder sometimes Y?