She will sit at 1am
Thinking of what she did wrong
And draw absurd conclusions that
She just wasn’t good enough for you

She will
Toss and turn at 2am
Asking herself why you
Let her go so easily

She will cry at 3am
Thinking of how you
Let her fall
Knowing well
You never intended
Of catching her

She will want to
Hate you at 4am
But instead find herself
Scrolling through
Your pictures

She will want you
To hold her tight at 5am
And tell her you miss her
Whilst you kiss her forehead so gently

She will catch herself at 6am
Sleeping at the thought of you
Telling her you love her
And how you never want
To let go

She will wake up at 7am
To a wet pillow
Because you let her sleep
Wondering if you ever cared
About her the way you claimed you did

She will start her day
Trying to find a piece of you
In the men she offers herself to
Only to find disappointment waiting for her

She will drown her wild thoughts with drugs
Just to numb the pain
She will call, cry and scream out your name
With a heavy heart;
That is yearning to be with you..
Your touch was like silk dripping in honey,
But now all I feel is ice shredding my flesh like broken knives.
Your breath was the only atmosphere I wanted to live in,
But now it’s the gas that gags me.
Your smile was the velveteen rabbits dancing in circles inside my mind,
But now it’s the vines choking my alabaster bones.
You were the one thing in this world that I wanted,
But now...


  I don’t know what I want.
Heartbreak can really take a toll on someone, I know it did for me. *Remember I am still pretty new at this so bear with me! Positive and constructive comments welcome!*
solfang 6h
how can I envision the future,
when I'm stuck in the present,
dwelling on my past.
I find it hard to plan or foresee my future because I can't handle the things on my hand now. I blame my past memories for all of this
Can't help it cry
Thinking why you had to die
Before you could fly
So young and bright...
Your life gave me hope now
Your death gives me power
To do more than I can
Knowing one can die
In the blink of an eye
But death is painful
Only to the living
The leaving are being set free
From the burdensome world
Filled with strife
And very few moments of glee
Pain is hard to ignore but it's good to know because it makes you a better version of you!

Follow me and I will follow you back. Let's interact and socialise!
I keep my distance
Because sometimes
The space between us
is all
I have
Ayana 7h
Nostalgia

Similar ways , similar game,  similar pain ... you said you were different but you're definitely just the same....

Familiar ways , familiar pain , familiar place, familiar shame....

You know my name ..you know my face..... you claimed that you knew me.. but you obviously Don't....

Guess I must be crazy ... crazy to think  that things were just a little hazy......or you must be crazy ....or are we both crazy....

A. Jackman
Thanks for reading ..much like I have someone to talk to ...
Do you ever stop and think
I'm not just trying to be cheap
with these words that I speak?

They're everything that I wanted to say
but you stole them away.

And I know I can't stay
but how do I leave
the girl of my dreams
alone?

Do you ever stop and think of me?
Well I've been thinking of you
with everything that I do.

And all the words I wanted to say
you'd just throw them away.

And I know I can't stay
but how do I leave
the girl of my dreams
alone?

Jellybean
you know you make me scream
but I'll be crying out in vain
forever.

Jellybean
you know you'll make me sing
the song without a name
forever.

Burst out in a curse at the wind.
Do you know how it feels
to be the only one to see?
Forever really is
the longest time.

Now I know
I've gotta live a life alone.
But it's not what I wanted.
You've gotta know that I wanted

Jellybean.
we have to give it a name
but i don't want to get attached
let's give it a name i don't like
i don't like jelly beans
lets name it jellybean
Needles?
They don't cut
They only leave a sting

For about a moment there
I was content meeting
The chills

And so,
What dies will soon
Become what is known
As the pain that separates
The heart from the soul

It's a pain that doesn't
Understand why it's there
Never have I loved so much
And never did you care.
the soul is forever. and ever.
Painlessly I paved my way
through this life
Till fear came and brought it’s knife
(Or a dagger, may it be?)
And paved its scar inside of me

And so I, kept this walking
into blinding paths, unseen
And twisted trails and trials
that turned my dream

And though the scar I hide
was healing inside
I could not hide
it’s seam
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