As a child growing,
time was my loyal companion,
Holidays coming in the perfect moment
Annual Birthdays never failing
Weekends always showing up.
But.
As an adult growing,
time has become an antagonistic companion
Never allowing me
To recover from
The past or
The present.
now there is another year gone
that includes
moments in which
I was drowning in mistakes
and seconds in which
I was floating in euphoria.
I want time to stop
For the ability to process
the gulps of bitter water
or sweet sensation of hovering in joy
as they happen,
Not when the ball drops
and we all scream,
For time has not ceased,
to show the world,
to show us,
to show me,
who is in charge.

past in time
too unaware
before looking
down on
myself

now in time
crystal clear
bias unbound
conclusions come
I’m faulty
of something I
could correct

self reflection
to be aware
keeps me
up at night
playing back
events in time
I could’ve
done right

She hums in quiet desolation,
wishing that I would stay.
Or maybe she thinks
the song is really catchy,
in which case
I’m the pathetic one.

Lovin you is like chasing a ghost,
I'm freaked out n in darkness i've lost.
Your love was ma sun,now ma heart is frost,
Liftin up ma drink,but without a toast.
I promise myself i'll never love someone again,
Because i've so tired from all of its pain.
Maybe i did wrong,there's noone i can blame,
I thought i forgot,then i hear your name.
Silence sounds better with the time,without you,
Spending ma time with u,feels like i do something true.
Truth or dare,tears n fear are only things i ever knew,
I was good boy with bad life,hatin someone is new.

Just because it didn't last forever,
Doesn't mean it was a mistake.

I tried to find my reflection in the glass
But all I ever saw were the things I lack

all the smudges in the mirror
made me go insane

all I ever thought I was
was a mistake