In my late hunger I listen to the swirl of night traffic, until
it dies around the curb— recedes into remembrance,

to that melting space inside— the sound
matching the tempo of my lowest need,

getting lost in the evening’s reflection—
ice memories melting to water,

everything moving to my traffic flow—
to the single track of my inside voice.

The cup of tea
sat cold on the table,
I waited for her,
but the chair remained empty.

Another sunrise and sunset,
another pair of eyes filled with regret.
Who’s waiting for hope and luck to arrive at their front door,
but even if it came who’s to say they wouldn’t still expect more?
And would we even cast any blame,
if you’re angry that tomorrow came?

Time is cruel and time is no friend;
half were in school; the rest trying to meet an end.
As a sun will set a newborn life will fade,
with moments you can’t forget
and one’s you would never trade.
It’s hard not to feel the same;
to be angry that tomorrow came.

He said take a note and give me five
“no one gets out of here alive.”
Who do you want to be for the rest of your life?
“Just a reminder, you don’t live twice.”
They tell me to grin my teeth and bear it
soft demeanor but eyes like a knife.
It’s clear they don’t want me to share it;
my collection of troubles and strife.
They’ve got closed eyes and plugged ears,
talking over each word I try to speak.
While it all feels like endless years,
in truth it’s only been one week.
And the reality of it is actually quite tame
but still you get angry that tomorrow came.

It’s a hazy afternoon with the sun in the sky
and I’m standing in the gloom of someone else’s goodbye.
And I could paint a thousand pictures
and never get the landscape quite right,
just like adjusting and fixing the fixtures
but never obtaining the perfect light.
It seems so insanely mundane,
but I’m trying to not be angry, that tomorrow came.

You can’t cleanse the bad from the good
there will always be residue permanently,
and it’s not so simple to gain some wood
you’re always going to have to cut down a tree, eventually.
Make sure the earth will burn, with an untamed flame
The world continues to turn, regretful that tomorrow came.

I didn't know longing until I couldn't find words anymore in a poem, my heart was once a vessel, it carries the abundance of love and death, but now it is an animosity of a futile hollow bearing the long gone memory of my craft.

it's like I wake up on the other side of the bed, it feels like it's someone else's now; the warmth, the scent, and on how their body leaves a mark, an indentation to it.

I've been a different person now, I didn't stay in the bookshop like I used to do, I just watch the people passed by through coffee shops like it's their routine or it's just the time continuously goes by without us knowing, everybody left. I seek shed in the slow burn moment love than to a fervent storm of it, that crashes all the halls I've long built; It's a deep shame to take what's mine.

it's 3am and all I can think about is the way you touched me and looked into my eyes as you moved a single strand of hair from my face and told me "don't look at me like that" so I responded, "the eyes never lie"

it's 3am and all I can think about is the way you picked me up to carry me over the puddles in the parking lot because it rained

it's 3am and I can hear your laugh

it's 3am and no one tonight even came close to being better than you. they were all losers. no one looked at me the way you do

it's 3am and I haven't heard from you in over a week

it's 3am, will I ever hear from you

it's 3am, probably not

it's 3am and I feel like a psychopath

10-7-24   1:07pm

certain sounds
and certain movies
certain shows
with certain scents

you're engraved
in my memory


my heart still beats
so fast
when you come
to mind
it goes back in time
it remembers your touch
your smile
your kiss
your laugh
your passion
your eyes
those eyes
filled with wonder
and curiosity

you don't find many people
like that
few and far
in between



perhaps you're also thinking of me
as much as I am about you

maybe not

so many maybes
so many questions
left
unanswered