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Nayana Nair Mar 2018
There were pieces of you
that were not mine.
I tried to make you my picture,
tried to get rid of the part
where I could see reflection
of loves that could have almost stayed for life.
I wanted you for me
and that’s where I went wrong.
krm Mar 2018
I envied the cadavers haunting my nightmares,
watching those before me
spread upon a metal slab
bodies are hand-me-downs of regurgitated poetry,
with wretched closets in which I take their place.

This ventilator called "loved ones"
forcing breath into anguished lungs-
tragedies belonging to these poets meant something,
a desire to save the words written,
but never the one who becomes a eulogy.

Agony burrows inside of me,
conversations with my mother's ghost
still,
the living are possessed by
the dead's shortened tomorrows.

To die by suicide wouldn't give,
authenticity to hurt.

I am learning the autopsy of a soul:
extracting a heart from the chest,
as it's sense of belonging was never there.
An inability to weigh the words bleeding from valves,
aside lungs I'm unable to breathe through.

How ungrateful is it of sorrow to ask for hope?
placed in a pill divider to swallow,
muscles within my throat so tight.
Wondering,
How many times did I diminish my voice?

Inside the brain,
schematics of labyrinths with no end to betterment.
Surgeons reach for a soul,
an iridescence small enough
held in a gloved palm,
watching it writhe.
Placed upon a slide,
but even a microscope
cannot perceive the pain a soul hides.

Once more,
stitched with needle and thread.

Wilting of my own garden,
comes one day-
an incision is made opening me up.
My heart showed the same
blood-red ink, writing apologies
on the marble floor.

They opened my arm,
displaying a noose of veins.
In this moment,
they removed my soul
only to gift it to another
birthed from torment
ripped out of the arm's of their mother
& into the embrace of woe.

—V.H.
Hopefully, it makes sense.
our Love
could never
be
shOVed

try on
an
other hug
we are never
lost
in
our
LovE
?







...
..
.
here
hold my
...
..
.
Danial John Feb 2018
To get her
Together

Eyes
Mesmerize
Realize
Lies

******* **** to get her
******* **** together

Tethered
Fettered
Tar and feathers
Wrecker

To get her
Together
It don’t mean **** to me, I think
trf Feb 2018
Prior to our divorce, the echo chamber,
a blazed path of scorched earth where a mistletoe once grew;
I will admit, my mate was a sheep in wolf's clothing and I the opposite, an inside out porcupine.
We use to joke about it over a couple glasses of wine,
until our second therapy session, the grapes smelled sullen
and the joke was pronounced dead on arrival.  

I am one to never quit: a job, a duty, yet the car was totaled,
having just installed our toddler's seat, my hand was forced.
Holidays apart, a decade of predetermined calendars,
"every others", now omnipresent words
scrolled into our patchwork speech patterns.

It was a Thursday morning, extra early, for me at least,
when I discovered my wife's "extramarital affair".
Something the lawyers like to call it, doesn't soften the blow though,
it's not like say, taking steroids, counting cards or
drinking vinegar to pass a **** test.

Merely thinking back renders my breath useless, vision impaired,
while that car wrecks at the same high speed as my heart thumps.
Allstate, just write the entire ******* check out to cash, I'm bare,
this fate was All my fault; apparently I lost her along the way.

Easier to do nowadays with what, say everything nowadays.
Haven't gotten to the part where I,
"allegedly attempted assault", on her new lover.
I must wait for two inks to dry before divulging that burnt dirt:
one on our old divorce decree, but more importantly,
the other on her new marriage license.
FIN to be CONTINUED.
"Wolves were just like sheep, for they gambled and frisked, and every day was fete day in Wolfland"
"Don't get it right, just get it written" ~ A lesson in life from mr. James Thurber.
off
her
feathered pillow

he trapped three
scoff blurr
weather
ed
willow

rhyme for me
with out reason
we will
know
the
reason

it may not be for me
she knew we wouldn't
slap her
so
she
slapped me
?


















...
..
.
how far over it
could you
...
..
.
all the while you wait
past complication s implications still remain

each line i have composed
which one minus me
thrown math
tunnels

he forgot
how to read
into simplicity
harvard
un
i
versity

time me
as
you
bathe
your puddle

this poetry seeped for me
it came in through the cellar window
edges on the wall
corners
felt
in
se
cure

read me less i sayd myself
this memory you have blown
their pale perceptions
cast
on
you

has dust not been shaken
have your boots not tread paths
what choke hold have you
grips
of
hand


your touch means what to me
hands on self momentarily
head in hands
for
security


see me here
in
this
corner
approach
me for your
final kiss
my fist
or my
lips
i
am
angers smile
worth of while
?
























...
..
.
note to self
wait
an
minute
let me
go
...
..
.
I hit rock bottom,
and then I start again.

I don't let the bad times take away the positive things I've done.

I take a deep breath,
I get up,
I continue walking down the road.

There are so many things I would like to do before I'm gone,
I'm not letting a little wind take away my opportunities.

I hit rock bottom,
and then I start again.

Even when it seems like everything is lost.
Even when my head hurts for crying.
When my eyes burn because of the tears.
Even when my knees are red for being on the floor,
and my body can't hold itself straight anymore.

I wake up to a better day, every day.

I put on my jacket,
my favorite pair of boots,
the nice beanie my mom knit for me,

and I go out.

I keep on dreaming.
I keep on smiling.
I keep on breathing.

I live.
A reminder to stay strong, never give up, and always keep fighting.
From me, to you ::and me::
Tate Feb 2018
Throwing silk sheets over a worn mattress
I cannot fathom the idea of you sleeping here
you accidentally pulling a corner off and seeing the stains beneath.
This hotel has been vacant for months.
But that doesn’t mean the guests before you
Were kind to it.
They said ‘**** it’
Left the mess for house keeping,
Blood stained walls
Feathers from ripped pillows
A maid sighs and shakes her head
Ten dollar tip for wasted effort
Have to put the pieces back together again
Vacancy sign illuminated again.
Do not do this to me again.
Cleaning supplies are expensive.
And this business has made me so poor
hello bellvadear
are you still bald
we seen
an
picture


of
you


this letter may seem to read









rather weird




you see
we think
you gots
man
am
i
hands


listen to my head
you are in here
with
us

we have stripped you naked
just look
at







yourself



now
i
am
naked to

don't try to touch me
you don't know me
like this
i
am




not
an
child





but





i
am






tell your husband you layrd with me naked
tell him you thought about me while putting on your *******



yes
you
tell him
all these things


see our pressure relief valve
might need to be checked
as well as your
reference
to
people guide

we seen you hiding in corners
we felt your hate behind screens
all the names you have taken
the names we have taken
draw me closer to me
what are you
being drawn
into


our user names never tried to catch any one
tell me beyond your version of learning to read
what are branded glaciers in your mind



if all in love was obvious would you still be in it

see we know your after our thoughts
is your husband an writer to
does he wash his own vehicle
has he ever got you stranded in the snow
have you eaten by candle light
does he zip your dress just right
does he write you love letters
tell me all
of
these things

tell me nothing at all
doesn't matter if your screaming
ive been past
the
point



of
catching an fall

just pretend your image wont smear
please write me an letter
titled
letter for
bellvadear
?














...
..
.
trapped rats
in
the
corner
...
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