Can you miss something you never had?

You can only miss something if you had it because

If you never felt how it was to have it and then proceed to like it,

Is it even possible to miss it?

Can you miss something you never felt?

I feel a sense of adhuri

Why do I not feel complete?

I’m missing something

My lover is an artist
She won't look back
Her experience has told her stories
She looks at people in white and black

Her words can the strangers away
As her friends are put to peace
She can turn night into daytime
Just like that
Bring the light out of black
But, she chooses her colors wisely as her facts

The stars turn into bright streetlights
When she walks by
The moon plays a symphony just for her smile
The sun is already in her eyes
The night looks in them for some life
Or some mode of surprise
That you just won't find

My lover speaks like silence
Neither argues nor judges
As she sleeps in the skies

I felt things,
but I didn't want to look weak in front of you.
I didn't ever tell you,
but I thought you'd just know.

I felt things.
I felt like I was at home.
I felt like all of the places I'd gone
led me here.
Here. Or I mean there.

The breeze was indecisive.
The mosquitoes were ever present.
There were people, as always, watching.
Watching, waiting. Ready and alert.
But we didn't care.

The world could wait.

In those moments,
I knew that our hearts were made of the same.
The same emptiness.
The same hopeless hopefulness.
The same visions of the future.
But also the same tangled knot.

The knot.
The knot that couldn't be untied.

The world could wait.

Our hands weren't meant to hold each others.
We held them anyway.
This feeling was an accident,
but it seemed impossible not to try it.

The world could wait.

I knew by the way you hugged me,
you wished for the same miracle I did.
The miracle that this might accidentally work.

Do you ever accidentally remember when:
The seats were back.
We were nervous and we knew the truth.
But we accidentally held each other anyway.

I tried to tell you
what had happened to me,
why I was scared.
You didn't notice, so I thought that

The world could wait.

You felt like home. You said something.
I couldn't hear over the sound
of both of our hearts.
I didn't want to ask.

The world could wait.

You probably didn't notice
the day I fell in love with you.
I never could tell you.
But I thought it could wait.

After all, we had the rest of our lives.
Except, you forgot to call.
You forgot to remember.
My days weren't your days anymore.
It was okay.

The world couldn't always wait.

We still had the same.
Your smile was still mine.
Our future was still ours.
But your time wasn't mine.

Could the world wait?

I wasn't worried.
We were stronger than that.
The days were a little bit longer, though.

Until one day, I felt a few strings
being torn from the knot.
But it wasn't from my heart.
What happened to hopelessly hopeful?

The world didn't wait.

My heart is still somewhere back there.
It may be lost in the park
or in the passenger seat next to you.
Yours is somewhere I can't reach.

I still feel things.
I'm still feeling the breeze.
I'm still annoyed by the mosquitoes.
I'm still waiting for you.

You are light when suns hide
like the smile on your face
You are gorgeous
like wind I cannot see
you gravitate me
like all planets when I’m not around
you are genesis
like the way I felt when I first saw you

love is a lifetime of examples of how we can overcome our fears, worries, and doubts.
It is invisible but can be seen, it is intangible but can be felt,
it is inaudible but you know it when you hear it.
at times it can seem to be extinct, and others make you as euphoric as the most powerful drug.
in the end it is only you who can choose to let it in, push it away, or accept it

I didn't want to let go...
of all of our memories
of the long lost nights talking
of the dreams we'd share to one another
of the interest that was once mutual.

I didn't want it to change...
at least not into this
i liked you so much
i couldn't tell you what this feeling is.

But you let me go, and I fell on your shallow ground...
i wasn't the prettiest, so you didn't want me
i wasn't the funniest, not entertaining
i'm not the most colorful, so you didn't see me
but you used to...what happened?

Yet, after I told you that I couldn't watch you disappear...
and although you didn't seem to care
somehow, i felt relieved.

Because it wasn't you that I was going to lose...
but just another part of me.
i saved my self, and i got away.
i truly cared for you
after all the things telling me not to...
and you let me get away.
thank you