All I
Am
And
Who
Ill
Be
B
a
  l
   a
    n
     c
      e
       d
      On a
    C h a i r  

Hung   in   space

       Silence
          And
Tranquil Peace

       Frozen

    In the air




Then a
       Shift
A slight
  Movement
     From the
L
  e
    g

And my, me, myself, I,
Ends-up-turned
On the floor, ego dead.

Nerves are running wild,
my breath is slightly hitched.
Anxiety's creeping up on me,
I can barely think.

Afraid of disappointment.
Afraid to disappoint.
One step before the other,
prepared for someone new.

He charms me with a smile,
then extends a hand.
My palms are getting clammy,
and my pulse is racing too.

The breeze flows in from the door,
the sun is shining bright.
Currawong's singing in the trees,
With the aroma of bitter coffee.

We breeze through introductions,
sit and chat for a while.
There I thought it was going well,
until he developed a temper.

With no good reason he seemed to snap,
started causing a scene.
Sinked so low into my chair,
of course this happened to me.

Some time passed, he calmed himself,
but i think i'd made my decision.
got to the end and he turned to me,
"We should do this again".

"I don't think this is going to work",
I said sorry then took my leave.

You hide behind a curtain of insecurity,
blushing and allowing your eyes to fall
to the floor when they give you kind words
to follow and acknowledge. Deflection
is a skill so fine tuned and honed
that it's innate, a reflex built
into your body. Yet you never stopped
to think that they never had to say
those lovely things
and they chose to anyway because they truly
believed them. Perhaps it's time
for you to believe them too.

I stand there
I can feel the bass
Thumping
As everyone is dancing
I stand there
With my arms feeling too long
Too big for my body
Embarrassed and uncomfortable
Something odd happens within
And a darkness bursts out
Of the light and cheery
That is always within me

And just like that
Goes my good mood

I want to kiss you.
It sometimes physically hurts not to kiss you.
I don't want to look into your eyes,
because I don't want to see the confusion in them.
I don't want to explain myself.
I just want to feel your breathing on my face as
my lips fit onto yours.
I want to slip my thumb
under the line of your jaw,
and tip your head back,
to expose your beautiful, long neck.
I want to run the tip of my nose along it
and to hear nothing but our breathing.
Sometimes I look at that face and
it's like I've been hypnotized,
my greatest desires want to come out.
I want to kiss you sweet god in another life
I would kiss you.
And then afterward,
press a soft hand to your lovely head
and wash the memory from it.

the sky blushes at the sight of you
while the wind can't keep its hands away,
caressing
feeling
kneading/needing every inch of your delicate frame and together you dance through the dawn in an intricate waltz to music only you can hear

the sky blushes at the sight of you
while the clouds whisper sweet things about you,
gossiping
admiring
lusting over the concept that someone as beautiful as you might be able to one day love them too, but knowing you wont they disperse and clear your view to leave only the blushing sky in their wake with nothing left to hide behind

the sky blushes at the sight of you
while the moon attempts to catch one last glimpse of you
sneaking
stretching
peeking over the horizon to see just how beautiful a creature you are, but it can't stay long so it settles for the scrapes on your knees and the bruises on your knuckles and can't help but think that they only add to your unsurpassable beauty

the sky blushes at the sight of you
while you stare at the stars that are rapidly and seemingly altogether
fading
melting
disintegrating because the sky cannot help but stare back at the lovely soul that gazes above to make the sky wonder if it's pretty enough, so the sky goes through every colour to please you, black, blue, grey, purple, orange, before finally giving up in a fit of embarrassment that you always seem to find prettiest

the sky blushes at the sight of you
while you can't help to blush back